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Man Refuses to House Unemployed Brother-in-Law: Heartless or Justified?

by Diply Social Team
2 years ago
in Family
Reading Time: 13 mins read
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Picture this: your brother-in-law has never held down a job, lived with his mother his whole life, and now he’s asking to move in with you and your family. What would you do? One man faced this dilemma and decided to put his foot down, refusing to let his unemployed brother-in-law move in. But with the family member now facing potential homelessness, the question remains: is he being heartless or simply protecting his family? Let’s dive into the story and find out.

The Brother-in-Law’s Situation

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

Mother-in-Law’s Decision

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

No One Wants Him

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Bold Request

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Reasoning Behind the Refusal

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Angry Response

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Truth About the Room

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

Attempts to Help

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Apologetic Texts

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

Couch Surfing and Family’s Stance ️

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

Family’s Prediction ️

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Bed He Made? ️

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Couple’s Stance

Image credit: astonmarten | astonmarten
astonmarten | astonmarten

The Ultimate Dilemma: Family Loyalty vs. Personal Boundaries

So, this man and his wife face a difficult situation: should they let their unemployed brother-in-law move in, or stand their ground and protect their family’s well-being? While they’ve tried to help him in the past, his lack of effort and entitled attitude have left them unwilling to budge. Now, with the brother-in-law couch surfing and the family predicting he’ll be homeless soon, it’s a moral dilemma that’s sure to spark heated debates. What do you think? Are they heartless for not letting him in, or should they prioritize their own family’s needs? Let’s see what the internet has to say about this situation…

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Hold your ground, NTA. He made his bed, let him lie.

Image credit: astronaut9999 | astronaut9999
astronaut9999 | astronaut9999

NTA for refusing to house unemployed brother-in-law. He needs motivation

Image credit: Caribooteh | Caribooteh
Caribooteh | Caribooteh

NTA – Brother-in-law’s responsibility lies with his parents, not you. ‍♀️

Image credit: carraigfraggle | carraigfraggle
carraigfraggle | carraigfraggle

NTA for refusing to house entitled and rude brother-in-law.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

NTA refuses to house brother-in-law after 14 years rent-free

Image credit: DialPlumeria | DialPlumeria
DialPlumeria | DialPlumeria

From unemployed to hotel manager: inspiring story of self-improvement

Image credit: WriteAnotherWoods | WriteAnotherWoods
WriteAnotherWoods | WriteAnotherWoods

BIL needs to take responsibility for his life.

Image credit: teresajs | teresajs
teresajs | teresajs

NTA. Commenters agree that BIL needs to get a job.

Image credit: Kitsumekat | Kitsumekat
Kitsumekat | Kitsumekat

NTA. The brother-in-law’s reaction shows why he shouldn’t move in

Image credit: PAUL_DNAP | PAUL_DNAP
PAUL_DNAP | PAUL_DNAP

Teaching responsibility to family can be heartbreaking.

Image credit: valathel | valathel
valathel | valathel

Don’t let family guilt you into housing them. NTA

Image credit: MotherOfMoggies | MotherOfMoggies
MotherOfMoggies | MotherOfMoggies

Commenters agree: unemployed brother-in-law won’t leave. NTA.

Image credit: BeletheDawn | BeletheDawn
BeletheDawn | BeletheDawn

NTA. BIL is lazy and entitled. Don’t enable his behavior

Image credit: Sunnymum93 | Sunnymum93
Sunnymum93 | Sunnymum93

Unemployment benefits in NZ don’t require consistent job history

Image credit: ArtemisCoco | ArtemisCoco
ArtemisCoco | ArtemisCoco

NTA. Refusing to house an unemployed brother-in-law with erratic behavior and potential danger to a child. Similar family experiences shared.

Image credit: FudgreaTheDestroyer | FudgreaTheDestroyer
FudgreaTheDestroyer | FudgreaTheDestroyer

NTA for refusing to house unemployed brother-in-law, AH are mother and brother-in-law.

Image credit: Ennah_Schemer | Ennah_Schemer
Ennah_Schemer | Ennah_Schemer

Sibling refuses to house jobless brother-in-law: reasonable or heartless?

Image credit: MortalSmile8631 | MortalSmile8631
MortalSmile8631 | MortalSmile8631

NTA for refusing to house unemployed brother-in-law. Unemployment system differs.

Image credit: Annual-Contract-115 | Annual-Contract-115
Annual-Contract-115 | Annual-Contract-115

NTA. You’ve done everything you can. Don’t enable him.

Image credit: yawnymac | yawnymac
yawnymac | yawnymac

Unemployed for 14 years? Professional leech. NTA, hold ground.

Image credit: CA1900 | CA1900
CA1900 | CA1900

NTA refuses to house unemployed brother-in-law, sparks debate.

Image credit: RamblingManUK | RamblingManUK
RamblingManUK | RamblingManUK

NTA for refusing to house entitled, unemployed brother-in-law

Image credit: nerothic | nerothic
nerothic | nerothic

No sympathy for lazy brother-in-law. NTA

Image credit: v2den | v2den
v2den | v2den

BIL is an alcoholic, jobless, and always scheming. NTA for refusing.

Image credit: MaiTai0427 | MaiTai0427
MaiTai0427 | MaiTai0427

BIL called a parasite, commenter says NTA.

Image credit: Mary_Misanthrope | Mary_Misanthrope
Mary_Misanthrope | Mary_Misanthrope

NTA, but family should still help each other out

Image credit: tifuwithmywife | tifuwithmywife
tifuwithmywife | tifuwithmywife

NTA. Commenter points out manipulative behavior and lack of independence.

Image credit: Dumbassahedratr0n | Dumbassahedratr0n
Dumbassahedratr0n | Dumbassahedratr0n

Clear NTA verdict with no further discussion

Image credit: roses_are_rachel | roses_are_rachel
roses_are_rachel | roses_are_rachel

NTA. You don’t owe anyone a free handout

Image credit: Demented-Alpaca | Demented-Alpaca
Demented-Alpaca | Demented-Alpaca

NTA, you worked hard for your home and owe him nothing.

Image credit: coolpiggie | coolpiggie
coolpiggie | coolpiggie

BIL needs to learn some tough life lessons. NTA!

Image credit: rusticgoblin | rusticgoblin
rusticgoblin | rusticgoblin

Family enabling unemployment? NTA tries to avoid homelessness.

Image credit: krlrk | krlrk
krlrk | krlrk

Sibling loyalty prevails: Wife not falling for brother’s manipulation.

Image credit: that_was_way_harsh | that_was_way_harsh
that_was_way_harsh | that_was_way_harsh

Don’t be a pet leach owner! NTA for setting boundaries.

Image credit: festybesty | festybesty
festybesty | festybesty

Letting him sink or swim is the best way to help.

Image credit: redpurplegreen22 | redpurplegreen22
redpurplegreen22 | redpurplegreen22

Family feud: NTA comment sparks drama with no replies.

Image credit: mtbgravelgirl | mtbgravelgirl
mtbgravelgirl | mtbgravelgirl

Supporting unemployed brother-in-law: obligation or not? NTA says no.

Image credit: JenninMiami | JenninMiami
JenninMiami | JenninMiami

Setting boundaries with family. NTA, tough love needed.

Image credit: KellyfromtheFuture | KellyfromtheFuture
KellyfromtheFuture | KellyfromtheFuture

NTA. Tough love may be the push he needs.

Image credit: cassowary32 | cassowary32
cassowary32 | cassowary32

NTA. Avoiding a potential burden on oneself

Image credit: River_Song47 | River_Song47
River_Song47 | River_Song47

Misunderstanding aside, brother-in-law’s situation justifies man’s refusal.

Image credit: cdp657 | cdp657
cdp657 | cdp657

Brother-in-law is entitled, but mom may also be an AH

Image credit: Binky390 | Binky390
Binky390 | Binky390

NTA commenter suggests alternative ways to help unemployed brother-in-law.

Image credit: PettyHonestThrowaway | PettyHonestThrowaway
PettyHonestThrowaway | PettyHonestThrowaway

Unemployed brother-in-law won’t change, NTA for not housing.

Image credit: sreno77 | sreno77
sreno77 | sreno77

Woman shares experience of being taken advantage of by unemployed BIL

Image credit: GGal43 | GGal43
GGal43 | GGal43

NTA refuses to enable brother-in-law’s couch surfing lifestyle.

Image credit: Snoo_68114 | Snoo_68114
Snoo_68114 | Snoo_68114

Not the a**hole: Entitlement is out of control.

Image credit: StellalunaStarr | StellalunaStarr
StellalunaStarr | StellalunaStarr

NTA refuses to house unemployed brother-in-law. Tough love?

Image credit: aquasaurex | aquasaurex
aquasaurex | aquasaurex

NTA, protecting your child and home comes first

Image credit: greenegret | greenegret
greenegret | greenegret

Don’t let him move in. NTA

Image credit: witch59 | witch59
witch59 | witch59

NTA, but maybe suggest charities for brother-in-law’s life skills

Image credit: wanderlustlost | wanderlustlost
wanderlustlost | wanderlustlost

NTA – Sometimes tough love is the only option

Image credit: twinings91 | twinings91
twinings91 | twinings91

NTA. Hilarious and savage way to put it.

Image credit: verminiusrex | verminiusrex
verminiusrex | verminiusrex

Friends suggest housing brother-in-law, but NTA stands firm.

Image credit: TeamChaos17 | TeamChaos17
TeamChaos17 | TeamChaos17

Commenter asks for more information about brother-in-law’s situation. Replies reveal he receives government support and lives with his mother.

Image credit: CarlowCarlo | CarlowCarlo
CarlowCarlo | CarlowCarlo

Don’t let him live with you or give him money.

Image credit: Asleep-Cry-7146 | Asleep-Cry-7146
Asleep-Cry-7146 | Asleep-Cry-7146

Mom’s fault? NTA thinks so. Unemployed for 14 years? ‍♂️

Image credit: Draigdwi | Draigdwi
Draigdwi | Draigdwi

Entitled brother-in-law won’t leave. NTA for refusing to house.

Image credit: Wise_Entertainer_970 | Wise_Entertainer_970
Wise_Entertainer_970 | Wise_Entertainer_970

Unemployed brother-in-law overstaying welcome? NTA made right call.

Image credit: OneTwoWee000 | OneTwoWee000
OneTwoWee000 | OneTwoWee000

Commenter expresses sympathy for BIL and suggests therapy options.

Image credit: agentninety8 | agentninety8
agentninety8 | agentninety8

Compassionate suggestion to help brother-in-law without housing him.

Image credit: Kahlessa | Kahlessa
Kahlessa | Kahlessa

Entitled brother-in-law called a leech, NTA for refusing.

Image credit: gwynhiblaidd | gwynhiblaidd
gwynhiblaidd | gwynhiblaidd

Commenter jokes about 14 years of unemployment, no replies.

Image credit: dcoleski | dcoleski
dcoleski | dcoleski

Living rent-free with conditions is fair. Enabling leach-like behavior? Not.

Image credit: oldt1mer | oldt1mer
oldt1mer | oldt1mer

NTA’s uncle overstayed his welcome for 30 years

Image credit: peace-monger | peace-monger
peace-monger | peace-monger

Sibling warns against housing lazy, entitled brother-in-law. NTA

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Brother-in-law asked rudely, NTA for refusing to house him.

Image credit: CleanAssociation9394 | CleanAssociation9394
CleanAssociation9394 | CleanAssociation9394

Commenter explains why enabling is not the solution

Image credit: Economind | Economind
Economind | Economind

Compassionate advice on housing unemployed family member.

Image credit: talithar1 | talithar1
talithar1 | talithar1
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