We’ve all heard stories of parents who believe that tough love is the key to raising successful children. But when does tough love cross the line into emotional abuse? In this story, our protagonist, who is childfree herself, becomes friends with Lily, a mother of three. Lily’s husband, Rob, is a firm believer in the ‘bully your kids to success’ approach. After witnessing Rob’s harsh treatment of their children, our protagonist decides to confront Lily about her enabling behavior. But is it her place to intervene? Let’s dive into the story and find out.
Meet Lily and Rob
Rob’s Parenting Style
No Affection, Just Fear
A Painful Incident
Rob’s Harsh Response
Confronting Lily ️
Lily’s Tearful Response
A Bold Accusation
Awkward Exit
Advocating for Kids
Tough Love or Emotional Abuse?
Our protagonist finds herself in a difficult situation, witnessing her friend Lily’s husband, Rob, emotionally bullying their children. Unable to hold her tongue any longer, she confronts Lily about her enabling behavior. Lily tearfully admits she doesn’t know how to change Rob, but doesn’t want to interfere as she doesn’t see it as abuse. Our protagonist, a survivor of an abusive home herself, warns Lily that her children may cut ties with her if she continues to enable Rob’s behavior. The conversation ends on an awkward note, but the question remains: is it tough love or emotional abuse? And was it our protagonist’s place to intervene? Let’s see what the internet thinks of this situation…
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“NTA. Emotional abuse is just as damaging as physical abuse.”
NTA, but OP- have you asked if her husband scares her?
NTA. Enabling a dad who makes his kids miserable? Not cool
Empathetic friend offers support to scared mom in abusive situation.
NTA: Standing up to a bully dad for the kids
ESH, Approach with empathy and empower, not shame. Parenting is hard
NTA. Speaking up for the kids, breaking the cycle
NTA. Stop the chain of abuse. Consider involving CPS for help.
“YTA. You crapped all over your friend because of your own triggers then just left her there alone and crying because it was…awkward…for you. If you really cared, you have had ample opportunity to say something to the person that really needed to hear it. Did you offer her an out? Did you tell her you had her back? No, after spewing negativity all over her, after you saw how much your words distressed her and you just walked away. Wow.”
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Supportive friend offers advice and help for abusive relationship
Kids remember when a parent doesn’t have their back
Commenter criticizes mom for being blamed; highlights sexism.
Parenting debate: Preparing kids for the world without tearing them down.
Engaging comment defending enabling mom’s fear of seeking help.
NTA: Friend concerned about potential abuse, advises open communication
Friend confronts enabling mom about concerning behavior. Awkward tension ensues.
“Emotional abuse: A silent but harmful form of parental behavior.”
NTA: Recognizing the different forms of abuse
“NTA. Abuse has lasting effects. I relate to this so much! “
Supportive friend offers help in abusive relationship.
Empathetic support for a friend in an abusive relationship.
Concerned friend questions enabling mom’s behavior. What’s really happening?
NTA- Stand up for kids, help friend recognize abuse
Concerned friend wants to help abuse victims.
Friend defends mom, suspects friend is also being abused.
Calling out an abuser: NTA, Rob is plain wrong.
Enabling mom, abusive husband, and a friend caught in between
Child’s negative experience with enabling parent leads to resentment
NTA, but have a heart-to-heart about seeking professional help.
“NTA: Rob needs a reality check about friendship! “
