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Expectant Mom Faces Off with Mother-in-Law Over Childcare Plans

by Diply Social Team
1 year ago
in Family
Reading Time: 16 mins read
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Picture this: you’re a 25-year-old woman, newly pregnant with your first child, and your boyfriend’s mother has never liked you. She’s always been rude and cold, even going as far as calling your family ‘white trash’ because they’re lower-income than her son’s family. Now, you’re trying to plan for the future, balancing work, school, and a baby on the way. But instead of support, you’re faced with your mother-in-law’s unsolicited opinions and a ‘sacrificial’ offer that you just can’t accept. What would you do? Read on to find out how our protagonist handled this tricky situation!

Unexpected Pregnancy Announcement!

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Future Engagement Plans

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Mother-in-Law’s Disapproval

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

️ Covid’s Impact on Life

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Pursuing a Degree

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Planning for the Future

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Taking Time Off for Baby

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Supportive Boyfriend

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Unwanted Calls from Mother-in-Law

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Grandmother’s ‘Sacrificial’ Offer

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Rejecting the Offer

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

University Daycare Option

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

Boyfriend’s Reaction

Image credit: Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840
Various-Category-840 | Various-Category-840

‍♀️ Choosing Daycare over Grandma: Right or Wrong?

Our 25-year-old mom-to-be is caught in a dilemma. She’s working hard to finish her degree while pregnant and plans to take a semester off after the baby is born. But her boyfriend’s mother, who’s never been a fan of her, swoops in with an offer to move to their city and watch the baby for free so her son doesn’t have to pay for daycare. Our protagonist doesn’t want this woman, who’s always been unkind to her, to be so involved in their daily lives. So, she politely declines the offer, explaining that her university has an affordable daycare option. This doesn’t sit well with the mother-in-law, who accuses her of wanting to ‘ride off her boyfriend’s income for as long as possible.’ The boyfriend agrees his mom’s words were unacceptable but thinks our protagonist should have at least considered the offer. Now, she’s left feeling awful about the whole situation. Let’s see what the internet thinks of this situation…

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Don’t let her control YOUR baby. Good luck!

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Refuse verbal conversation, use texts to have proof; set boundaries.

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Moving in-laws may lead to guilt trips. NTA.

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Cutting off toxic in-laws and trusting college daycare. Good luck!

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Stand your ground and shut her down

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Standing up to toxic mother-in-law with honesty and boundaries

Image credit: ChinaCatSunflower44 | ChinaCatSunflower44
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Stand your ground, MIL would make a horrible babysitter

Image credit: askashleythatsme8 | askashleythatsme8
askashleythatsme8 | askashleythatsme8

Stand firm and don’t let the witch bulldoze your family

Image credit: Top-Bit85 | Top-Bit85
Top-Bit85 | Top-Bit85

Setting boundaries with in-laws can be tough

Image credit: Silver-Reserve-1482 | Silver-Reserve-1482
Silver-Reserve-1482 | Silver-Reserve-1482

Expectant mother-in-law drama: NTA suggests calling out rude behavior

Image credit: BorderAcceptable6416 | BorderAcceptable6416
BorderAcceptable6416 | BorderAcceptable6416

NTA stands up to mother-in-law with fiery response

Image credit: MyRedditUserName428 | MyRedditUserName428
MyRedditUserName428 | MyRedditUserName428

Stand your ground, Mama! Cow MIL has no power here

Image credit: Laquila | Laquila
Laquila | Laquila

BF needs to handle atrocious MIL behavior now or it’ll escalate

Image credit: Knittingfairy09113 | Knittingfairy09113
Knittingfairy09113 | Knittingfairy09113

Stand up for yourself and your child. Don’t tolerate disrespect.

Image credit: pulledporktaco | pulledporktaco
pulledporktaco | pulledporktaco

NTA. Daycare is great for socializing and learning boundaries. Watch boyfriend’s actions towards family.

Image credit: wishiwasyou333 | wishiwasyou333
wishiwasyou333 | wishiwasyou333

Set boundaries with boyfriend’s mom to protect your baby

Image credit: FlipRoot | FlipRoot
FlipRoot | FlipRoot

Expectant mom gets support for cutting off toxic mother-in-law

Image credit: MedievalWoman | MedievalWoman
MedievalWoman | MedievalWoman

Mother-in-law wanted baby aborted, now wants to babysit? NTA.

Image credit: rshni67 | rshni67
rshni67 | rshni67

Free childcare from relatives is rarely ever free

Image credit: whtsnnm | whtsnnm
whtsnnm | whtsnnm

NTA. Have a real discussion with your partner and set boundaries

Image credit: emptynest_nana | emptynest_nana
emptynest_nana | emptynest_nana

Consider daycare instead of involving mother-in-law in childcare decisions

Image credit: D_Mom | D_Mom
D_Mom | D_Mom

Joint decision on post-partum leave and daycare – NTA

Image credit: LiveOutlandishness44 | LiveOutlandishness44
LiveOutlandishness44 | LiveOutlandishness44

Choosing daycare over MIL due to neglectful babysitting. Yikes.

Image credit: what-are-they-saying | what-are-they-saying
what-are-they-saying | what-are-they-saying

Set boundaries and exclude grandma until a genuine apology is made.

Image credit: chevelle71 | chevelle71
chevelle71 | chevelle71

Stand your ground! Your BF’s mother can kick rocks!

Image credit: cx4444 | cx4444
cx4444 | cx4444

Protect your baby from MIL , stick to your plan

Image credit: Every-Requirement-13 | Every-Requirement-13
Every-Requirement-13 | Every-Requirement-13

Protect your child. Don’t let her babysit NTA

Image credit: OutlawPixieStick | OutlawPixieStick
OutlawPixieStick | OutlawPixieStick

Communication is key with partner before baby arrives

Image credit: lowkeyhobi | lowkeyhobi
lowkeyhobi | lowkeyhobi

Supportive Reddit communities for dealing with overbearing in-laws. Congrats!

Image credit: Efficient-Cupcake247 | Efficient-Cupcake247
Efficient-Cupcake247 | Efficient-Cupcake247

Stand your ground and don’t take her bad mouthing you!

Image credit: Snoo-32071 | Snoo-32071
Snoo-32071 | Snoo-32071

Setting boundaries with in-laws is important for a healthy relationship

Image credit: Venus_Cat_Roars | Venus_Cat_Roars
Venus_Cat_Roars | Venus_Cat_Roars

Grandma’s childcare vs daycare debate results in snarky comment.

Image credit: BewilderedToBeHere | BewilderedToBeHere
BewilderedToBeHere | BewilderedToBeHere

Boyfriend needs to stand up to his mother before it’s too late

Image credit: TicoSoon | TicoSoon
TicoSoon | TicoSoon

Boyfriend’s mother is a viper, NTA for not letting her babysit

Image credit: Assia_Penryn | Assia_Penryn
Assia_Penryn | Assia_Penryn

Boyfriend needs to stand up to his mean mother. NTA

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Choose daycare over a mother-in-law who despises you.

Image credit: bickets | bickets
bickets | bickets

BF needs to step up ASAP or MIL will make life hell

Image credit: MissAnono | MissAnono
MissAnono | MissAnono

College daycare was a great option for my kids

Image credit: njdevil956 | njdevil956
njdevil956 | njdevil956

Be firm with your partner and MIL about childcare decisions

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Protect yourself and your child from toxic in-laws.

Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]
[deleted] | [deleted]

Standing up to toxic in-laws for baby’s safety

Image credit: shenanigansco34 | shenanigansco34
shenanigansco34 | shenanigansco34

Working mom defends daycare, says not everyone enjoys staying home.

Image credit: Masonriley | Masonriley
Masonriley | Masonriley

NTA, communicate thoughtfully and stand your ground with BF’s input

Image credit: Apprehensive_teapot | Apprehensive_teapot
Apprehensive_teapot | Apprehensive_teapot

Protect your child & family from toxic MIL. NTA

Image credit: Own_Log9691 | Own_Log9691
Own_Log9691 | Own_Log9691

Inspiring story of overcoming obstacles and pursuing education despite challenges

Image credit: Top-Pangolin-4253 | Top-Pangolin-4253
Top-Pangolin-4253 | Top-Pangolin-4253

Avoiding the MIL’s offers might be the best decision. NTA

Image credit: No-Session5955 | No-Session5955
No-Session5955 | No-Session5955

Stand up for yourself and reconsider marrying into disrespectful family

Image credit: Physical_Internet292 | Physical_Internet292
Physical_Internet292 | Physical_Internet292

Don’t let toxic in-laws babysit your child.

Image credit: ShelyChelle | ShelyChelle
ShelyChelle | ShelyChelle

User dislikes daycare and disapproves boyfriend’s mother’s behavior

Image credit: loeloebee | loeloebee
loeloebee | loeloebee

Cutting off MIL? ‍♀️

Image credit: MooseWorldly4627 | MooseWorldly4627
MooseWorldly4627 | MooseWorldly4627

Set boundaries with toxic mother-in-law to avoid parenting criticism. NTA

Image credit: Money-Bear7166 | Money-Bear7166
Money-Bear7166 | Money-Bear7166

Set boundaries with firm kindness to avoid unwanted advice and visits

Image credit: Ipso-Pacto-Facto | Ipso-Pacto-Facto
Ipso-Pacto-Facto | Ipso-Pacto-Facto

Get on the same page with BF before grandma debacle

Image credit: Dachshundmom5 | Dachshundmom5
Dachshundmom5 | Dachshundmom5

NTA suggests confronting MIL about past behavior and setting boundaries

Image credit: Valkyriemome | Valkyriemome
Valkyriemome | Valkyriemome

Setting boundaries early is key. NTA.

Image credit: Traditional_Age_9110 | Traditional_Age_9110
Traditional_Age_9110 | Traditional_Age_9110

NTA stands up to overbearing mother-in-law with boyfriend’s support

Image credit: This_Statistician_39 | This_Statistician_39
This_Statistician_39 | This_Statistician_39

Cutting off toxic MIL: a victory for self-care

Image credit: Iamno-one23 | Iamno-one23
Iamno-one23 | Iamno-one23

Beware of toxic grandparents poisoning your relationship with your child

Image credit: Slytherin_2tonez | Slytherin_2tonez
Slytherin_2tonez | Slytherin_2tonez

Stand up to toxic family members, even if it’s hard

Image credit: AngleObjective8350 | AngleObjective8350
AngleObjective8350 | AngleObjective8350

Suggest daycare at school or limit contact with disrespectful MIL

Image credit: naughtyzoot | naughtyzoot
naughtyzoot | naughtyzoot

Stand your ground and set firm boundaries with your boyfriend’s mother.

Image credit: EconomyVoice7358 | EconomyVoice7358
EconomyVoice7358 | EconomyVoice7358

Set FIRM boundaries with BF’s mother for new baby arrival

Image credit: SilentCounter6750 | SilentCounter6750
SilentCounter6750 | SilentCounter6750

Encouraging comment on standing up to mother-in-law, supporting family choices

Image credit: halfpint991 | halfpint991
halfpint991 | halfpint991

University daycare with education PhDs helped my kids excel. NTA.

Image credit: wvtarheel | wvtarheel
wvtarheel | wvtarheel

Mother-in-law’s toxic behavior towards expectant mom warrants a big NO

Image credit: DamnitGravity | DamnitGravity
DamnitGravity | DamnitGravity

Suggests college daycare with student interns for best childcare. Advises not to engage with mother-in-law and stand up against her bullying behavior.

Image credit: Schlemiel_Schlemazel | Schlemiel_Schlemazel
Schlemiel_Schlemazel | Schlemiel_Schlemazel

User supports OP and calls out mother-in-law’s behavior.

Image credit: Paddogirl | Paddogirl
Paddogirl | Paddogirl

University daycare programs are great for early childhood development

Image credit: zohrzohr | zohrzohr
zohrzohr | zohrzohr

Establish firm boundaries with MIL or risk minimal grandchild time

Image credit: No_Pepper_3676 | No_Pepper_3676
No_Pepper_3676 | No_Pepper_3676

Don’t entertain toxic family, it’s not their decision

Image credit: PeraLLC | PeraLLC
PeraLLC | PeraLLC

Navigating mother-in-law drama with communication tips. Good luck!

Image credit: meradiostalker | meradiostalker
meradiostalker | meradiostalker

NTA. Follow your instincts and set boundaries with your MIL.

Image credit: IntentionNo3217 | IntentionNo3217
IntentionNo3217 | IntentionNo3217

Supportive commenter congratulates and advises against mother-in-law babysitting.

Image credit: purplenotebook1 | purplenotebook1
purplenotebook1 | purplenotebook1

Stand your ground and don’t let her bully you

Image credit: sdbinnl | sdbinnl
sdbinnl | sdbinnl

NTA – Supportive advice to handle overbearing mother-in-law

Image credit: Enviest0 | Enviest0
Enviest0 | Enviest0

Choosing professional daycare instead of MIL, and taking courses with baby.

Image credit: Cam515278 | Cam515278
Cam515278 | Cam515278

Grandmother’s relocation for grandkids vs. daughter-in-law’s approach ‍♀️

Image credit: Nerdso77 | Nerdso77
Nerdso77 | Nerdso77

Standing up to toxic MIL, putting baby’s well-being first

Image credit: spookybitch321 | spookybitch321
spookybitch321 | spookybitch321

NTA. MIL issues often stem from SO not standing up.

Image credit: ExpensivelyMundane | ExpensivelyMundane
ExpensivelyMundane | ExpensivelyMundane

Single mom’s inspiring success story

Image credit: NoNameForMetoUse | NoNameForMetoUse
NoNameForMetoUse | NoNameForMetoUse

Facing off against a toxic mother-in-law. NTA, stick to your plan

Image credit: Temporary-King3339 | Temporary-King3339
Temporary-King3339 | Temporary-King3339

Navigating mother-in-law conflicts with empathy and communication. NTA

Image credit: LhasaApsoSmile | LhasaApsoSmile
LhasaApsoSmile | LhasaApsoSmile

Mother-in-law’s racist behavior causes family tension. NTA.

Image credit: Inlovewithkoalas | Inlovewithkoalas
Inlovewithkoalas | Inlovewithkoalas

Boyfriend needs to set boundaries with controlling mother-in-law

Image credit: ElegantBon | ElegantBon
ElegantBon | ElegantBon

NTA accused of getting pregnant to avoid school and job.

Image credit: SunshineShoulders87 | SunshineShoulders87
SunshineShoulders87 | SunshineShoulders87

Stand your ground politely, it’s your baby and your decision

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