A Redditor ran into a bit of family drama recently and asked her fellow Redditors whether she was in the right or wrong.
OP found her daughter crying. She asked why, and it turns out OP’s sister had done something quite bizarre.
“Am I the [jerk] for insulting my sister after she Photoshopped my daughter’s pictures?”
Here ‘s the thread. To keep things straight, we’ll call OP’s 14-year-old daughter “Lucy”, and OP’s sister “Valerie.” We’ll call OP…uh, OP.
Anyway, Valerie took her daughter and Lucy to the mall recently. OP notes that Lucy has become much more self-conscious as she navigates the difficult teen years.
Lucy had a good time… at first.
“When Lucy got back home, I asked her how her day went,” writes OP. “She smiled and said that she had a good time.”
But then, three hours later, things changed. OP found Lucy in her bed, crying.
Valerie had posted some altered photos of their mall outing.
“Lucy… pointed out that Valerie had obviously photoshopped her. She made her complexion clearer, her teeth whiter and even slimmed her waist,” writes OP. “Lucy also pointed out that Valerie only Photoshopped her in the pics. Lucy dropped her phone on the ground and cried her eyes out.”
OP went on the offensive.
“I called her and demanded to know why she would alter Lucy’s image,” OP reported.
Valerie shot back, “Last time I checked, I could post whatever I want on my account.”
She went on to defend her actions, saying she just wanted to make Lucy look ‘better.’ Things concluded with Valerie calling OP a drama queen, hanging up and blocking her.
Yikes.
It’s one thing to photoshop yourself, even if this can contribute to body issues in and of itself. But photoshopping someone else, and only that person, seems to send a message that they don’t meet your beauty standards. It’s especially bad when that person is already at a tough age.
Let’s get the dissent out of the way.
One commenter blamed both OP and Valerie.
“Valerie’s behavior is toxic to Lucy, and you do need to stop that,” they wrote. “Hollering and insulting [are] childish. You didn’t get Valerie to hear you. You just made her defensive. How might you have accomplished what you wanted?
Photoshopping the pics sends a clear message.
As many commenters noted, the message is loud and clear: this 14-year-old, the one with body issues, is not good enough and not slim enough for her aunt’s liking. I feel really bad for the poor girl.
Is it even legal?
Laws probably vary, but at the very least, posting a pic of a minor without their consent certainly seems unethical.
“Report the pictures for posting images of a minor without consent, or whatever option is available to get them taken down,” recommended one commenter.
Overall, the verdict was clear.
After a few days, the post was awarded a ‘not the a-hole’ badge, which is the closest thing the Reddit jury has to a verdict.
“Your sister apparently has no problem giving a child body image issues,” read the top-upvoted comment . “Keep being a great mom and reaffirming your daughter’s beauty.”
How would you handle this?
Going zero to a hundred in an argument might not be the best option, but when it’s over something that involves your kid, it’s fairly understandable.
Parents, how would you handle this predicament? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below!
