Quotes Showing How Much I'd Much Rather Be Eating

I love eating so much, it's practically become one of my favorite pastimes. Without fail, there's almost nothing I'd rather be doing. Simply put, food feeds the soul and brings us together with the people we love.

For those of you who happen to feel the same way, you're my kind of people. So much so that I've compiled a short list of quotes that truly exemplify just how much I'd rather be eating.

This raises an excellent question.

This is one of the great paradoxes of human existence. It's further proof of the Buddhist's mantra that all life is suffering.

Why do the things we aren't supposed to eat taste the best? It just isn't fair.

Can't a guy just eat some carrots without causing a commotion?

I was eating some baby carrots with ranch dressing the other night and my fiancee legitimately became concerned. She was convinced I'd received bad news from my doctor and that I was dieting for health reasons.

Live life without regrets.

Don't look back in anger and don't live a life of regret — these are two life principles that I try to adhere to without fail. Am I going to keep myself up all night over my indecision to have an extra piece of cake? No, I am not.

How do I love thee?

Chocolate is patient, chocolate is kind. It's never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude. Chocolate bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things — endures all things. It is the essence of life, the fountain of youth, and the best damn thing there is on this planet.