A teenager is asking for judgement after refusing to play happy family with her mother who is coping with childhood trauma and the effects of a divorce. The daughter says she is tired of pretending to be a happy family when her mother decides to come over for dinner, and wants to set boundaries. The situation is complicated by the fact that the mother is a medical practitioner and works long hours. The daughter's decision has upset her father and she is wondering if she is the a**hole. Read on to find out more about this family's drama.
Unsplash | Unsplash
Strained relationship with overworked, insecure mother due to childhood trauma.
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When pretending to be a happy family gets exhausting 😩
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Teen navigates parents' separation and mother's insecurities
Growing up, the poster's father constantly reminded them and their sister to check on their mother, who suffered from depression and anxiety. Now, with their parents separated, the mother expects the family to play happy every time she decides to drop by for dinner, and the poster is tired of pretending. They refuse to entertain her whims and are now questioning their decision. The situation brings to light the effects of a separation on a family and how it can impact mental health. In this post, we dive into the complexities of familial relationships and the challenges of supporting loved ones through mental health issues. The post also highlights the importance of boundaries and the need for individuals to prioritize their own mental wellbeing. Let's discuss this post and share our thoughts on how to navigate tough family dynamics.
NTA. Don't be your mom's therapist. Change your locks 🔑
GangGang_Gang | GangGang_Gang
Supportive comment advises teenager on dealing with immature parents 👍
Dramatic-Dish8009 | Dramatic-Dish8009
Setting boundaries with a parent post-divorce. 🤔
NotMyCircus170 | NotMyCircus170
Putting your emotional needs first is not selfish, NTA 👏
exul_noctis | exul_noctis
Sibling struggles in parent's separation, living situation not ideal 😔
lady_wildcat | lady_wildcat
Setting boundaries with emotionally immature parent, recommended book and article 📚
allexgrace | allexgrace
Teen struggles to prioritize her and her sister's needs. NTA ❤️
throwawayj38sld | throwawayj38sld
NTA child of emotionally abusive parents gets support and advice.
Whitestaunton | Whitestaunton
Teen forced into parental role, shows maturity and self-awareness. 🧑👧
Proud_World_6241 | Proud_World_6241
Support for a teen dealing with a narcissistic parent 🙏
nanya_Business_b00 | nanya_Business_b00
Teen rightfully prioritizes own needs over selfish mother's after separation 💪
wkendwench | wkendwench
Drawing boundaries after parents' separation. Therapy recommended. Good luck! 🤞
del901 | del901
Parent demanding child to parent is unacceptable. NTA. 👌
ArundelvalEstar | ArundelvalEstar
Choose what's best for you, but be polite and firm 💪
felinestrong | felinestrong
Cutting off toxic family members is tough but relieving. 💪
Orangesunset98 | Orangesunset98
Protecting yourself from a toxic parent? NTA 🙌
Lurkingentropy | Lurkingentropy
NTA. Dealing with a narcissistic parent is tough 😢
jojozabadu | jojozabadu
Encourage counseling for mom and protect your own mental health 💪
Babsgarcia | Babsgarcia
Neglectful parents force 14yo to fend for herself - NTA ❤️
microscopig | microscopig
Support is a two-way street. NTA for standing up.
TheSciFiGuy80 | TheSciFiGuy80
Prioritizing mental health as a parent 👏
rightobobo | rightobobo
Commenter calls out mom's victim mentality and enabling behavior.
AsuraRathalos | AsuraRathalos
Don't let mom have a monopoly on selfish behavior 🙅♀️
DiTrastevere | DiTrastevere
Being a child of separated parents is tough. Mental health matters.
Momster404 | Momster404
Put your mental health first. You don't owe anyone anything 💪
GreenDutchman | GreenDutchman
Divorce is hard enough without being forced to play happy families 😕
B_S_C | B_S_C
Mother's selfish behavior after separation leaves child in shock 😳
mustytomato | mustytomato
Commenter empathizes with OP's struggle with their mother's actions.
Icy_Conversation_612 | Icy_Conversation_612
Prioritizing your mental health is not selfish. 👏
AirenAshura | AirenAshura
Children are not emotional support animals 🙅♀️
I_Suggest_Therapy | I_Suggest_Therapy
Teen stands up to neglectful mother after parents' separation 👏
Vitalicize | Vitalicize
Teen stands up to selfish mother, earns NTA judgement 👏
Ahsoka88 | Ahsoka88
Setting boundaries with a bi-polar parent. NTA 👏
awkwrdaccountant | awkwrdaccountant
Childhood trauma takes a toll on mental health. #NTA
Knittingfairy09113 | Knittingfairy09113
Self-centered mom gets what she deserves. You go, OP! 🙌
Stompin_At_The_Savoy | Stompin_At_The_Savoy
Parental depression and burdening children = unhealthy. NTA.
trarecar1 | trarecar1
Commenter empathizes with OP's situation and calls out parents' behavior. 💔
that_fork_is_mine | that_fork_is_mine
Advice for setting boundaries with a needy parent 🚫👩👧
Comfortable-Side-757 | Comfortable-Side-757
Protecting emotional well-being: Mom's selfishness hurts everyone involved 💔
zealous-grasschoice | zealous-grasschoice
Suggest family therapy to deal with mother's unhealthy coping mechanisms. 🧐♀️
Sea_Requirement_9839 | Sea_Requirement_9839
Seek professional help for family's separation and well-being 💬
NeverRarelySometimes | NeverRarelySometimes
Parenting is a full-time job, not a part-time hobby. 👨🏻👦🏻
Master_Cave | Master_Cave
Putting your trauma on kids? Not cool. 🙅♀️ #NTA
BackhandSlapper | BackhandSlapper
Being a parent means putting your children first ↑👍
tcrhs | tcrhs
OP's mom expecting too much post separation 🤔
thesaturnalien | thesaturnalien
Curious about the reason for separation, NTA supports teen's decision.
[deleted] | [deleted]
Parents' responsibility to make kids happy, not other way around. 👍
ADHDLifer | ADHDLifer
Commenter takes a clear stance on parents' separation with NTA 👍
That_Contribution720 | That_Contribution720
Kids deserve peace too. NTA for setting boundaries with mom.
DazzlingAssistant342 | DazzlingAssistant342
Taking a stand for what you want and need. 🙌
[deleted] | [deleted]
Commenter supports teen's decision to not coddle mom. 👍
whatshedo | whatshedo
Validating the daughter's feelings and recommending family counseling 💔💼
Fragrant_Lobster_518 | Fragrant_Lobster_518
Don't be her emotional crutch. NTA 👏
daemoss227 | daemoss227
Be selfish sometimes, NTA. Your mom needs to support you 🙌
flyingcactus2047 | flyingcactus2047
Commenter suggests tough love for estranged mother. 💪
QueenCloneBone | QueenCloneBone
Empathize with the child's emotions and condemn the parents' actions 😔
Gullible-Attorney360 | Gullible-Attorney360
Teen struggles with mom's selfishness and parents' separation, NTA. 😡
miamimely | miamimely
NTA, mom's selfishness is damaging her children. She needs therapy. 💔
immadriftersbody | immadriftersbody
Choose yourself first! 🙌 You're not the a**hole. NTA
the_anonymous_gal | the_anonymous_gal
Therapy needed all around. NTA for refusing fake happiness 🧘♀️
emaji33 | emaji33
Reach out to mom's therapist and express your concern ❤️
Queen_Sized_Beauty | Queen_Sized_Beauty
Setting boundaries with parents after divorce: a difficult but necessary step 💪
practiceallthethings | practiceallthethings
Teen struggles with mom's selfish behaviour after parents' separation 🤔
slendermanismydad | slendermanismydad
Teen stands up for herself and sets boundaries with mom 👏
Ihateyou1975 | Ihateyou1975
Teen stands up to unfair family expectations after parents' separation 🙌
VibrantIndigo | VibrantIndigo
Supportive comment suggests therapy and challenges parent's decisions 👍
savvyblackbird | savvyblackbird
Questionable parenting and support for independent youths. 🤔
Neko4tsume | Neko4tsume
Teen won't fake happy family. NTA's reply celebrates self-care.
Obtuse-Angel | Obtuse-Angel
NTA for refusing to play happy family with absent parents.
MrsT381 | MrsT381
User sympathizes with teen and questions parents' motives for separation.
NoeticSkeptic | NoeticSkeptic
Standing up to mom's issues. NTA 🙌
Valerina13 | Valerina13
Validating the commenter's feelings and suggesting therapy for the mom 💙
Triona01 | Triona01
Commenter relates to OP's struggle with mother's denial, suggests therapy.
uwu_tears | uwu_tears
