Bride-To-Be Upset With SIL For Canceling Wedding Gift After Ceremony Called Off

Kasia Mikolajczak
wedding gifts on the table
Unsplash | Wijdan Mq

Weddings are sure a stressful time. I can attest to that, having just planned my own, haha. But there are do's and don'ts everyone should follow. For example, most people bring a gift, but if the wedding gets canceled, should you still have to give one? Hmm, I don't think so.

That's what this one guest thought too, but she got an earful from the bride-to-be. So she reached out to the Reddit community to find out is she was the mean one.

A woman recently posted on Reddit.

Reddit logo
Unsplash | Brett Jordan

She was supposed to attend her husband's sister's wedding. So she went ahead and ordered a gift from the woman's registry. But the bride-to-be accidentally chose the wrong thing. Therefore the two women were in touch about it.

Sadly, things quickly got awkward.

woman in a audience looking shocked
Giphy | Billboard Music Awards

You see, the wedding got canceled. So the woman decided to cancel the gift she ordered. But when the bride in question, didn't receive it she contacted the woman thinking that it must've gotten delivered to the wrong address.

"This past week she reached out to me about it," OP wrote. "Since she knew I was purchasing it and we live far away, she was concerned that it had been delivered but someone had stolen it. When I explained that I had canceled it, she was pretty upset."

That's the problem.

Reddit threat about bride upset with SIL
reddit | Reddit | u/Relative_Attempt6316

The woman informed the bride that since the wedding got canceled, she also canceled the planned gift delivery. And that's when the bride lost it, and got her mother involved, who called the woman to complain about it.

According to the MIL, it was unkind to cancel the gift.

man looking surprised
Unsplash | Ludovic Migneault

"She feels that since my SIL is clearly going through a difficult time, and the holidays are approaching, it would've been more appropriate to let the gift reach her anyway," OP wrote.

The woman spent way over what she considers a Christmas gift budget.

Lauren Conrad saying "whoa!"

"Obviously these are unfortunate circumstances, but this was a substantial gift ($700) and pretty well above the threshold of what I'd normally spend for a typical holiday gift," she wrote.

So, now she's asking people on Reddit if she did the right thing.

Not surprisingly, the folks on Reddit agreed with her.

wedding rings on a flower bouquet
Unsplash | Beatriz PĂ©rez Moya

Here's what one person said to her: "When a wedding is canceled, it would only be polite for the bride and groom to return the wedding gifts. That's the norm. ETA: Please do not feel guilty about canceling the gift."


Isn't that a normal practice anyway?

woman saying "You're absolutely right."
Giphy | VH1

I believe that it's polite for the couple who didn't get married to return the wedding gifts. After all, they got handed out for a purpose, and that event didn't actually happen. Am I alone in thinking this?

Actually, I'm not.

wedding gifts
Unsplash | Kadarius Seegars

Here's what another person said: "Actually, etiquette dictates that when wedding gifts are rec’d and the wedding is called off, gifts are required to be returned. Is a gift really going to soothe the jilted bride?"

What do you think of that?

Jimmy Fallon saying "This is ridiculous."
Giphy | The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

Are you team bride on this one, or do you side with the wedding guest here? I've already stated my position, but I'm curious to see what others think of this.

Plenty of people on Reddit said they didn't understand what the whole fuss was about anyway. The right thing is to return the gifts, period. So this whole incident didn't need to happen at all.