Thanks to The Millionaire Matchmaker , we’ve gotten a taste of what the job of a professional cupid is like — minus the diaper.
It’s a lot of finding desirable clients, talking with them to find out what they like, and then setting them up on a date and waiting for the sparks to fly .
This, however, is only the tip of the iceberg. Thanks to matchmakers revealing their secrets , we’ve learned more about the job — including things we didn’t want to know.
They play favorites
A professional matchmaker on Reddit admitted that they prefer average, interesting people the most.
“A lot of the attractive/rich people are assholes and totally terrible to date,” they shared. This means that it pays to be nice to your matchmaker if you want good dates!
Butterflies are a red flag
“Most of the time, when we hear about clients coming home from a first date where they felt fireworks and butterflies, it usually crashes and burns. The most successful relationships start with a slow burn.” —Erika Kaplan, Senior Matchmaker at Three Day Rule
They take physical appearance into account
If you aren’t active, the matchmaker on Reddit wrote that she’s not going to set you up with the girl who runs daily and plays volleyball. She puts in the effort to make sure both parties are at least somewhat satisfied.
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Core values are more important than shared interests
“You don’t have to share the same hobbies or like all the activities your partner does. Do you want to date yourself? The truth is, you need time apart to grow. And having your own individuality is attractive.” —Linda Prescott, Chief Matchmaker at Ideal Introductions
If you’re unattractive, you might get gouged for money
The matchmaker on Redditor wrote that there are some consultants who will gouge unattractive people for money simply because they would be harder to match.
Those who are good-looking, have a good job, etc, are taken on for less money because they’re less work to match.
Some clients go behind their matchmaker’s back
“When I send anonymous profiles to clients for consideration, they often reverse image search the profile photo and slide into the person’s DMs on their own. They say they ‘don’t count that’ as a match I found for them!” —Anonymous
They try not to find their clients attractive
If they were to fall in love with their clients, that would defeat the whole purpose (and basically be the plot of The Wedding Planner) . Instead, the Redditor wrote that the uncomfortableness of the situation stops them.
Women need to be in the right mental space to date
“If you’re a woman looking for a relationship, you need to be in a positive mental place. If you’re in a negative bubble, have dramas with your ex-partner or job, it’s not the right time to date. You’ve got to be happy first. Being positive is attractive.” —Linda Prescott, Chief Matchmaker at Ideal Introductions
They have clients who complain about disaster dates
Not every match, is, well, a match. The Redditor admitted that this usually happens because their client didn’t tell them or something, or because they didn’t know them well enough. When it happens, they reassess them and their profile.
They have celebrity clients
“I had an amazing client — she was literally from a royal family; a princess. She wanted a specific type of guy and had her eye on an NFL player. My assistant thought it was too far-fetched, but I knew I could do it. I ended up connecting with his agent and got them set up on a date.” —Anonymous
They’ve also had some weird clients
The matchmaker on Reddit wrote that the weirdest client they’ve ever had was a homeless man. A sweet woman agreed to go on a date with him in an effort to help him “get his feet wet” in the dating world again. Aww!
There’s no typical time frame
“It really depends on the individual, what type of person they are looking for, and their dating attitude. We had one couple who recently married — he met his match on his first date, while his date had been here 11 months. Some clients stay longer if they feel they want to keep searching and meeting new people, but some find a match on a first date.” —Linda Prescott, Chief Matchmaker at Ideal Introductions
They have to recruit some women
When it comes to dating apps, there are considerably more men on there than there are women. The same applies to matchmaking services, which is why the Redditor wrote that they find females from singles events.
Clients fail when they set the bar too high
“If you have your bar too high, you’ll set yourself up for failure. If the way you picked your partner or the personalities that you explored did not work in the past, we need to take you in the right direction. Some people are less open to our suggestions, but we have to tell them that they need to trust us. The bigger the wish list, the smaller the dating pool.” —Linda Prescott, Chief Matchmaker at Ideal Introductions
They have a pretty good success rate
“We got FOUR engagements this month! I love matchmaking. I have been doing it for 15 years. When the right match clicks, it’s the most magical feeling in the world.”
—Amy Van Doran, The Modern Love Club
