Meet our conflicted protagonist (F26) who’s been dating her boyfriend (M28) for a few years. He owns an apartment and has been urging her to move in with him. However, they can’t seem to agree on how to split the living costs. He wants a 50/50 split, but she feels that would be unfair since she’d be paying down his mortgage without gaining any equity. So, she’s proposed a different arrangement, but he’s not too happy about it. Let’s dive into the details and see if we can figure out who’s being reasonable here. ♀️
The Boyfriend’s Proposal

Her Counteroffer

His Response

Her Concerns

Clarifications

Current Living Situation

Landlord vs. Boyfriend

Her Stance

Current Expenses

Equity Agreement ❌

The Dispute ♀️

The Decision

Bank Session

Long-term Goals

To Live Together or Not: The Final Verdict
After much back-and-forth, our protagonist and her boyfriend have decided not to live together for now. She’ll continue living with her friends while saving up to buy a shared apartment in the future. They’ve even scheduled a meeting with their bank for further advice. While it’s clear they both have different views on finances, it’s essential to have these conversations early on to avoid major disputes down the line. So, what do you think? Is she being unreasonable, or is her stance justified? Let’s see what the internet has to say…
NAH. Comment suggests fair rent for girlfriend to pay.

NTA. Boyfriend benefits from equity, but also financial liability and risk.

Don’t let your boyfriend guilt you into unequal living expenses.

Protect yourself: Get a legal tenancy agreement written up.

NTA comment defends woman’s decision to not split living costs equally.

Smart approach to splitting payments, don’t back down

Consulted a lawyer who advised against paying boyfriend’s mortgage.

Splitting costs for his equity? No way! #NTA

Understanding the difference between principal and interest is crucial. NTA

Agreement on NTA comment, no further input needed.

Compromise offered, NTA for refusing 50/50 split.

NAH. Compromise and find a living situation that works for both.
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Sharing living costs without being included in the deed? NTA wins

Boyfriend’s refusal to split costs 50/50 is a red flag

Protect yourself! Sound advice for those moving in together.

Protecting oneself financially in a relationship is fair, NTA

Déjà vu? Redditors discuss the repetitiveness of this post.

Lawyer advises woman to focus on savings and hold off living together

Compromise is key for this NAH couple’s living arrangement
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NTA. OP wants to buy in, not be homeless.

Couple shared rent based on fair market value. NAH

Moving in together? Splitting costs 50/50 might not work.

Water pipe damage: Split 50/50? ‘Of course she won’t agree’

Fair to split bills 50/50 but not mortgage payment. NTA

Pay rent, not mortgage. Equity and fairness are complex issues.

Splitting living costs 50/50 vs paying ‘rent’ – NAH

Offering to pay current rent is fair and avoids misunderstandings.

NTA. Paying rent to a partner is a huge risk.

Fair or stingy? Discussion on splitting living costs in relationships.

Important considerations before splitting living costs with your partner

Boyfriend gaining equity while girlfriend gains nothing. NTA.

Couple disagrees on splitting living costs, seeks financial advice

NTA stands firm on not splitting living costs with boyfriend

A reasonable solution to a tricky financial situation

Protect your finances and don’t pay for what you don’t own

Protecting yourself is important . NTA for not paying mortgage.

Living with boyfriend to save money but not splitting costs fairly.

Balancing financial security and contribution in relationships.

Woman proposes fair mortgage split, boyfriend calls her a leech

Commenter calls out YTA for not wanting to split costs fairly

Commenter called out for misunderstanding OP’s proposal.

Commenter calls out OP for being selfish in relationship

NTA asserts equal expenses, but a reply disagrees

Suggests alternative payment method to YTA’s 50/50 mortgage proposal

Woman refuses to split costs equally with boyfriend. NTA.

Partner should aim for financial equity. YTA for not compromising.

Insightful comment about mortgage payments and equity distribution

Married commenter advises against paying boyfriend’s mortgage. Love and money.

Compromise and communication are key to successful cohabitation.

User thinks woman is the a**hole for not splitting rent 50/50 with boyfriend

Fair options presented for splitting living costs with boyfriend.

Splitting living costs: fair or stingy? It’s complicated

Fair market value rent split based on income is reasonable
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Compromise is key for this couple’s financial dilemma

Commenter thinks the system is messed up for everyone.

Commenter warns of potential abuse in 50/50 living cost split

Commenter called out for being stingy in living arrangement.
