When couples begin to think about having kids together, they have tons of “dreams” of what their family will look like. Many begin to envision how many kids they will have, what their names will be, and how they will grow their family together. Sometimes, that means sharing preferences of your future children’s genders, and even the order in which you have each child.
Some women want to have daughters over sons.
There are many women in the world who dream of raising “their own little girl.” Of course, there are others who dream of having boys, too.
Then, there are parents who are happy with having either a boy or a girl.
Many couples also take the stance that they are happy if their child is “healthy” and well, no matter what gender they happen to be in the world.
Many women struggle trying to have children in the first place.
According to Mayo Clinic, “an estimated 10 to 18 percent of couples have trouble getting pregnant or having a successful delivery.”
And, even women who do get pregnant often struggle.
About 10 to 15 pregnancies out of every 100 pregnancies end in miscarriage for women, %20pregnancies.) which is a huge number.
Therefore, many women feel incredibly grateful to have any healthy pregnancy and delivery at all.
Knowing that pregnancy is incredibly difficult and can end in such painful ways, many women are happy knowing they are able to carry a baby to full term and healthy.
But, still, there are some people who feel very strongly about the gender of their children.
There are some mothers who are very disappointed when they find out the gender they had been hoping for isn’t what they will have.
Recently, one mom opened up on a popular forum about a close friend of hers who is “very upset.”
A fellow mom opened up on popular forum Mumsnet, saying that a close friend is having her first baby and found out she is having a boy.
However, the expectant mom is “devastated” over the news.
The woman shared that her pregnant friend is devastated over the news and that she “always wanted a girl.” The friend asked if she was wrong for not understanding the expectant mom’s disappointment, as when you have a baby, the chances are 50/50 when it comes to gender.
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Many people on the forum agreed with the woman who posted, saying that the “devastation” is a bit much.
“Even if they were your ‘preferred’ gender, who’s to say that it will be as you imagined? A lot of pressure for a little child to live up to. I don’t get the disappointment either,” one person commented.
Some said that it’s hard for women with fertility issues to see women with healthy babies “disappointed.”
“l don’t get it and never will. It’s petty and childish. We have fertility issues so we will be lucky if we ever get a baby, never mind getting worked up about a pink one or blue one,” one woman added.
Others said there are deeper gender issues to consider for some moms in the world.
“I don’t agree with gender [disappointment] for simple reasons like, ‘I saw myself with a girl’. That grinds my gears. But some gender disappointment is more deep-rooted for some. I’m pregnant (unplanned found out late) with a boy and really didn’t want a girl, why? Because I carry a rare genetic condition that passes onto girls,” one mom pointed out.
There were some who understood the “brief moment of disappointment.”
“I can kind of understand this, but surely it would just be a momentary ‘oh blimey another DS/DD!’ and then you just get on with your life and prepare for your new baby,” a user commented.
Another said that opening up to friends is supposed to be “safe” and normal.
“I think it is normal to have hopes and dreams and as long as we can come to accept reality then what’s the harm with a friend expressing her feelings to a friend,” one person said.
And, one user summed things up rather clearly.
“I will never understand it for a moment. Healthy baby is the name of the game and if you get that, you should thank your lucky stars,” they said.
How do you feel about this expectant mom’s reaction to gender preferences?
