You kind of have to admit, we’ve maybe let corporations go a little too far. In a world full of long, stressful workdays and blatant advertising literally everywhere, it’s hard to catch a break.
Whether you’ve noticed it yet or not, the corporate dystopia is here. These strange pics are nothing short of proof that we’re in a little too deep.
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Brands aren’t just brands, there collectors’ items, too!
So we’ve reached that stage of capitalism, huh? In all seriousness, though, is there even a market for this kind of thing? Especially when you could just, I dunno, get the regular versions of these products instead. They’d actually be usable, too.
Can’t afford a pizza upfront? Just pay for it in 6 easy installments!
These sorts of payment plans can be kind of dangerous if you’re not careful. But… you probably shouldn’t use one to buy a pizza. That seems totally unnecessary.
A new outfit? Maybe. But a pizza!?
“The beach at Minehead, Somerset in south west England, a couple of days after the government voted to allow the water companies to pump more raw sewage into rivers and coastal waters, so they wouldn’t have to invest in treating it first.”
My only hope is that this isn’t the source of anyone’s drinking water. Still, though, can’t swim, can’t take cute pics, and the wildlife is going to hate it! Fun.
“Before my grandad died years ago, he always said that they will find a way to sell you oxygen in a can.”
“I always brushed it off thinking no one would ever do such a thing. They really started selling oxygen in a can at Walgreens…”
On the plus side, they aren’t selling this because there’s no oxygen left in the atmosphere or anything. Still, it’s kind of weird to sell something you literally can’t live without and use constantly.
There are plenty of brands that advertise on shirts, but Costco? Really?
I can’t tell if this is clever advertisement or just plain hilarious. Like, you wouldn’t catch me dead in a Costco branded sweatshirt, but I kind of appreciate the fact that they exist.
“McDonald’s makes a McRib NFT.”
If you’re like me and don’t actually know what an NFT is, then you’re probably going to be confused by that headline. But just know that it’s a very corporate thing to do.
“Five Guys in France uses these chips to prevent you from getting refills like in America.”
Free refills is the American way. But I guess American chains play by different rules when they exist in other countries. Still, this is a bit of a sleazy way to keep people from getting free refills.
Fortune cookie fortunes: now with free advertising!
Imagine cracking open your fortune cookie expecting some vaguely wise line about how you should be saving your money, only to find an ad instead. That’s a crying shame, I tell you!
You need all these cables, plus a dongle to be able to actually use them.
I’m convinced that the amount of different cables we need to charge or plug in anything we use is just a ploy for companies to make more money. Why else would they all break so easily!?
“This tag on my Nike sweater.”
This seems like some kind of glitch in the matrix. Like, it’s the kind of thing Nike wouldn’t want the average person to see, but it got out of the factory anyway. Or something like that.
Forget buying things in stores anymore.
Is there any difference between this box of Quaker grits and one you’d be able to find in a brick and mortar store? Probably not. But I can’t help but feeling like this is some not-so-subtle hint for people to do more online shopping.
“These Duracell batteries failed before the guaranteed date.”
Oh, sure. It’s not like anyone wanted those batteries to last as long as they were supposed to. I swear, things aren’t made like they used to be (or so I’m told).
“Cleaning out an old apartment and found a 1982 Coca Cola screwdriver set.”
This just weirded me out. The Coca-Cola company wears so many hats as it is, it would be weird for it to seriously take a step into the hardware industry. But I wouldn’t put it passed them.
“Disneyland’s fountain show without the water.”
Something about this seems so wrong. Like, it makes the rest of the park look like some kind of abandoned wasteland. It may be more of a corporate apocalypse than a dystopia, but that’s, like, basically the same idea.
“My microwave can remind me of dentist appointments and hair cuts.”
This seems like the exact thing smartphone companies are going to come up with next. Your phone can already set reminders, make calls, play videos, and do all sorts of other things. Next, they’re going to be able to microwave food or something.
“The place I work at gives a ‘bonus’ as an incentive for higher production rates. Let me introduce you to my departments bonus.”
Look, free food is great and all. But when it comes to promising bonuses as free incentives for work, maybe don’t make it a single cookie. A restaurant gift card at the very least would work!
As it turns out, *Black Mirror* is predicting the future.
Remember when we first started watching Black Mirror and thought, “it’ll still be a long time before the world ends up like that.”? Well, it’s happening.
At the very least, I hope our corporate dystopian future skips a few of the episodes’ ideas.
Something about the new Pringles logo just doesn’t seem right.
It’s not just me, right? There’s something off about the new Pringles logo. It just seems so cold, like it lacks heart or something. Sometimes, simplifying a logo doesn’t make it any better.
“A stress booth to ‘shout out stress’ at the bus station I’m waiting at.”
Sure, there are plenty of things to stress out over that don’t involve work, but I can’t help but feeling like this kind of thing wouldn’t exist if work culture was a bit better. But hey, gotta make that money somehow.
The amount of people charging their phones at this station.
(Insert someone talking about how we’re slaves to our phones here). Because, you know, we’re slaves to our phones and all.
But you never really think about it until you see something like this. Like, yeesh.
“We have a self-driving bus in my city.”
The worst thing about a self-driving bus is that there’s no bus driver to thank when you get off. Also, there’s no bus driver, which could be a problem in a bunch of different ways when you think about it.
“Nutrition facts vary depending on the state…”
Yeah, this is super shady. How does that even work? I mean, a calorie isn’t quite a calorie, but that shouldn’t mean that the entire nutritional value of a thing should change by state. That’s just weird, man.
“The keys on my coworker’s keyboard aren’t labeled.”
Okay, maybe this one isn’t a sign of corporate dystopia. But I do find it really funny in any case. I can just picture some company trying to use unlabeled keyboards to boost productivity or something.
“When I took it to tills it cost 11.99. They said only the one XXL unit was 7.50. So why pack them together?”
Yeah, the detergent packages look a lot alike, even though one is an XXL pack and one is regular. It almost feels like they wanted people to pick the more expensive one thinking it was the one on sale. How shady…
“My neighbors drive identical blacked out Yukons.”
This probably isn’t anything to worry about… or, it could be a sign that your neighbors are corporate spies, trying to keep a low profile while out and about. How you can keep a low profile in such conspicuous cars is beyond me, though.
“While walking yesterday night around Tallinn, we saw this delivery robot under way to complete its mission.”
I still don’t trust those little delivery robots. They seem kind of shady. How do I even know they’re going to come to my door, and not get knocked off the street by a bike or something?
“This GameStop next to this Smashburger really highlight the similarities between both of their logos.”
This feels like a break in the simulation. The corporate logos are all blending in with one another. Pretty soon, there’s going to be one big corporation with a red and white logo that controls everything (I’m mostly joking).
“Just moved into a new apartment and happened upon what I thought was a piece of painted over tape stuck to a bookshelf. Peeled it up to find it was concealing a mystery.”
It might be better to leave that SIM card alone. There was a reason why the person who left it there didn’t want it to be found…
This banana is advertising for some new Netflix show.
Hey, if you’re hanging out on a weekend and you don’t know what you want to watch, just grab a banana! It’ll give you a Netflix recommendation, apparently.
For real, though, why is this a thing?
“Work pods in Tokyo Station to get those extra hours in.”
Technically, you aren’t taking your work home if you just bring it to the work pod.
Or you could just not bring your work home. We shouldn’t have to run ourselves to the ground for a paycheck.
