Sometimes, it’s easier to complain or do stupid things because it’s what makes life fun.
Like, the worst thing is when someone tries to offer their two cents to help when it’s like, I’m a broken person who really enjoys being broken and having unsolvable problems that make me relatable, so just let me be, OKAY?!?!?!
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1. Shh, literally no one asked you for actual solutions to my problems!!!
So just let me sit here and wallow in my sadness and anger without doing anything about it because it’s just way easier to complain than to actually do something about my problems, okay?!
2. Shh, literally no one asked you to judge my poor decisions and inability to stay away from toxic men and bad relationships!!!
It’s like, no matter how many times I promise myself I’ll do better and make better decisions, nothing ever changes, so just let me live, okay?!
3. Shh, literally no one asked you to ruin this beautiful Pixar animated masterpiece that you best believe makes me ball my eyes out like a baby every single time I watch it.
Remy from Ratatouille is the hero we all need and deserve, so just let me enjoy it without bringing capitalism into this again, please!!!!
4. Shh, literally no one asked for your input, you Gemini!!!
It’s like, yes, actually, my horoscope says that Venus is in its third revolution around the sun, which means, as a Virgo, that YES I should be getting mood swings, okay? It’s so typical for Geminis to be this dismissive.
5. Shh, literally no one asked for these extra anniversaries, dammit!!
It’s just more work and more unnecessary money spent on gifts. It’s like, no, thank you, but I will not participate in this.
6. Shh, literally no one asked you to make me worry about the problems of dog actors, okay?!
I’ve already got my own problems to worry about, and I refuse to add to my plate!!
7. Shh, literally no one asked you to concern me with someone else’s universe, when I can’t even handle the universe I’m currently in…
Same with that last dog actors tweet. Like, I’ve got my own problems to worry about without worrying about no gummy bears…
8. Shh, literally no one asked you to ruin my favorite childhood cartoon dog!!
I’d rather leave the sweet memories of me watching Scooby-Doo and his dysfunctional friends untouched by your analysis, k thanks!
9. Shh, literally no one asked how I got here, but oooops, I did it again ?
I just got here and I don’t know how. I swear, it was Siri. I’m the victim in this whole situation. I’m BEING FRAMED!!!
10. Shh, literally no one asked you to explain how amazing your 4K screen is. Can you just let me and my not-water-resistant iPhone live in PEACE?!
Like, PLEASE, we didn’t asked to be attacked like this!
11. Shh, literally no one asked you to attack my food choices, so please, just let me eat my food in peace!!!!!
I’m gonna die anyway, so you can’t stop me from enjoying a large fry with my Big Mac!!!!
12. Shh, literally no one asked but oh god…you’re…using that… Wait, never mind.
I just hope I don’t somehow end up in the same bathroom as this person ever, because damn.
13. Shh, literally no one asked for what’s on the other side of that plate, sooo…
Technically, you’re not totally lying, because that is part of the snack, and it’s the healthy part, sooo I don’t see an issue here…
14. Shh, literally no one asked you for your weird food combinations, Joshua…
I love a good food combination that I’ve never thought of before. It truly excites my taste buds so much. But NO, we are not about to try this.
15. Shh, literally no one asked what I’m doing, so I’ll just bang my head against the wall and disappear, I guess.
You’re acting like I’m not here anyway, so I’ll just disappear. BYE.
16. Shh, literally no one asked for this much information!!!
Like, I just came in to smell some bath bombs and maybe get some free samples, but DAMN GIRL CAN I LIVE?!?!?
17. Shh, literally no one asked what you’re into in your spare time…
I’ve never watched those movies, but I heard great things. Live your most authentic life and do you, boo boo.
18. Shh, literally no one asked what’s going on here, but let me just cry in Italian and call it a day…
I won’t ask for the recipe or how this tastes. I’m gonna pick my battles. Good bye.
19. Shh, literally no one asked what’s in the recipe, but I think I’m too scarred by this to eat spaghetti ever again…
Again, not gonna ask how this tastes. I just hope she has a long, prosperous marriage.
20. Shh, literally no one asked ‘cuz y’all look v cute and age is just a number anyway.
Imagine all the wisdom and stories they share together. True relationship goals, tbh.
