There are a lot of wonderful things about starting a family and becoming a parent , but kids can also come with their own share of stressful scenarios!
One Redditor tried to get the low-down on the strangest reasons why people’s toddlers had a breakdown, and the responses they got ranged from the hilarious to the downright worrying! And, you’ll be glad to know that we have gathered the most outrageous of them all down below!
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The Existential Child!
“One of my toddlers is very upset about mortality. She keeps melting down saying ‘I don’t want to die. How will I talk? How will I eat?’ And then the screaming. But I guess it’s pretty logical, mortality sucks.” — gallopingwalloper
Sounds like this kid has a bright future of doing a Philosophy or English degree ahead of them! Things never change either, kid!
A Tantrum About Missing A Tantrum…
“My son was basically upset I missed the tantrum he had started to throw for grandpa… He was doing his face in the carpet, kicking feet, over the top fake crying when I guess he realized he was missing something.
“So he came upstairs, grabbed my hand, huffed and puffed angrily while walking me directly next to Grandpa, totally positioned me for the show, and got right back into meltdown mode. Looking up every so often to make sure we were still watching it. I asked my dad what initially set him off though. He said he shut off his own show and didn’t know what else to do.” — Danniixsaurr
This is the sort of behavior you expect from Premier League footballers, not kids! Have some self-respect children!
An Argument With The Cat…
“The cat cheated in a game they were playing.” — johnyann
Cats are always cheating, they’re not to be trusted! Also, they’re especially bad cheats if you’re playing Mousetrap with them!
Not My House!
“I’m a nanny, we are driving home from preschool. Enter his neighborhood, [Him:] ‘YOU SAID WE WERE GOING HOME..’ [Me:] ‘we are’ [Him:] ‘NO THIS IS NOT MY HOUSE’ [Me:] ‘I know but we are driving there.’ [Him:] ‘THIS ISN’T THE WAY TO MY HOUSE!’ *pulls up to house. [Me:] ‘see child we are here.’ [Him:] ‘THIS IS NOT MY HOUSE!’
“He repeats screaming and crying for about 15 minutes as I try to prove it’s his house via his animals and room and toys. Nothing worked. I actually became paranoid that this was not his house and I was in some strangers house with the same pets. The child got to my head.” — wet_lasagna
One person pointed out that they would have been very anxious that they had got the right house, but the wrong child!
Forcing Them To Work As A Postman
“My daughter said I was going to work at the post office with her when she grows up. I told her I’d be a teacher by then and couldn’t work at the post office.
“I spent 45 minutes consoling her and now I’m obligated to work for the post office in 15 years.” — SpaceAceMathews
What an absolute scoundrel, destroying their child’s dreams like that by not committing to a life as a postman! This is what parenting is all about!
The Imaginary Conundrum
“Because the imaginary door on his imaginary fire truck wouldn’t open, so he was stuck inside.” — [Deleted]
I hate it when you get locked inside your imaginary firetruck after leaving the imaginary keys in your other imaginary trousers!
Stick To Your Own Window!
“The enraged, sobbing wail from the back seat of my car ‘He’s looking out my window!’
“My youngest was mad because his brother was looking out of “his” window instead of the other one.” — RavnNite
Apparently, this one isn’t as bizarre as I thought it was as a lot of other people said that they used to have the same arguments with their siblings, with one person writing, “I was just about to say this! My sister is five years younger than me and we used to do a lot of road trips and it was always upsetting her!”
“Wasn’t exactly a full blown tantrum but still nonsensical…”
“Three-year-old: ‘Why do doctors have eyes?’
“Me: ‘Eyes? Or ice?’ (Thinking maybe it was going to make sense, silly me!)
“Three: ‘EYES!!!!’ (Like I’m the idiot)
“Me: ‘Because they are human beings?’
“Three: ‘No! Why do they have eyes!?!?’
“Me: ‘So they can see?’
“Three: ‘No! Why?!?!’
“Like, what answer do you want man? The question doesn’t even make sense! I don’t even want to admit how long this went on.” — Charliebeagle
The Cookie Ultimatum
“My two-year-old son heard my wife crumble up a receipt in the car tonight and for the next hour lost his mind that we had a cookie we were holding out on him. No amount of explaining could fix the situation.” — flypaper1001
The fact that he is so suspicious of you suggests that you have form in the cookie-withholding department! Give up your cookies old man!
A Deceptively Simple One…
“His tongue ‘wouldn’t stop sweating.'” — carlydoo
This one had me in absolute hysterics, and I’m not sure why. It is one of the grossest sentences I have read for a while, but I cannot help but laugh at it.
The Ultimate Regret
“My girlfriend-at-the-time texted me when she was looking after her 3 year old brother, [saying:] ‘Josh is crying because he doesn’t want an ice-cream. He already finished eating it. This was 15 minutes go.'” — KingGumboot
I mean, if I’m honest, this is something that I have done many times as an adult, just staring at an empty tub of ice-cream with nothing but regret and brain freeze.
The Tragedy Of The Star!
“My brother used to watch a show where one of the episodes was about a baby star being lost and away from its mom, I am pretty sure it ends with the star getting back to its mom. But once or twice we still found him quietly crying in bed because he felt bad for the baby star.” —correctmywritingpls
This one is absolutely adorable! I also remember one of my first meltdowns being when the Snowman melts in The Snowman. I wasn’t prepared for that!
Ruining Their Birthday
“She just started crying and said I broke her heart. After a few times of asking and calming her down, she told me it was because I ruined her birthday. Her birthday had been like 8 months before.
“I tried asking her how I ruined her birthday, but those were the only two sentences she would say.” — ClearBunnie
One other person, having faced a similar situation also added:
“I teach English as a second language to mostly very young children. Their parents are usually present while we work. I asked one of my five year olds when her birthday was. She said, and I quote, ‘December. And I’m NOT HAPPY.’ Apparently her cake was too small. I think she might have had cupcakes instead of a regular cake. Judging by how hard her dad started laughing as soon as she said it, they’d been hearing about it regularly for the past month and a half.”
The Twin Debacle…
“Because she wanted a twin sister (she has a twin sister).” — notsostepfordwife
Maybe she just wanted a better twin sister?! I mean, siblings can be incredibly annoying so this isn’t out of the realm of possibility!
The Mother’s Mother Problem
“That my mom was not my mom but her grandma.” — ApplesPeaches
Another long-suffering parent replied to this particular one, adding:
“Spent a year where my youngest would get mad when we explained how any family members were related in a way different than how they were related to her, as if she was born and everyone else sprung into existence to serve as her relatives. She would get mad because she thought we were making it all up to trick her.” — ButGravityAlwaysWins
A Time-Travelling Nightmare
“Crying because she didn’t get to go to her parent’s wedding – 7 years before she was born.” — LaziestGirl
This one is quite a classic one as it turns out, with countless people also saying that they had kids who had the exact same meltdown or even admitting to having it themselves when they were kids.
The Apple Juice Bath!
“Yesterday, our youngest son (1.5-years-old) had a meltdown because I wouldn’t let him pour his apple juice on the cat.
“I saw him start to, grabbed his cup, he just looked at me with a mixture of anger and sadness and cried ‘bath’ for about 10 minutes. Our cat is amazing with children but even she wouldn’t appreciate an apple juice bath.” — BrittanyBallistic
No matter how chill a cat may seem to be, pouring apple juice on it will turn it into an, understandably, furious hurricane of claws.
Ruining A Fart
“He loved being tickled so I was tickling him one day. He let out a huge fart and suddenly started crying and screaming. I ask him why he’s screaming and he replies with – I was saving that for later. How and why would you save a fart?” — ShutTheFrontDoor__
I don’t know what devious plans that toddler had for that fart, but I think you did yourself a favor by scuppering them!
“Elevators…”
“My kid thinks people get on them to die! I have shown her that it’s okay, even ridden one up and down with her (while she screamed the entire time). I just don’t get it. She yells at people not to get on the elevator! Screeches and is terrified if someone she loves gets on one…” — Tassidar
There are a lot more adults who are scared of elevators than you may think! I could never be one of them though, as the alternative is taking the stairs like a health-nut-nerd.
In Utero Cheez-Its…
“When my nephew was a toddler he asked my sister if she drank soda while she was pregnant with him. She said that she did have a glass or two and he freaked out and cried for and hour because ‘babies can’t drink Dr. Pepper it’s not healthy! Only milk!’
“They got him settled down and he asked if she ate Cheez-its when she was pregnant. She said ‘oh,no. Babies only drink milk so I didn’t eat cheez-its.’ He cried harder because ‘I would have probably liked to have some cheez-its!’ Melt down for another hour.” — De_La_Bodega
And yes, before you ask I shall indeed be starting a satirical post-punk band called “In Utero Cheez-Its.” I mean, it’s too good not to use.
h/t: Reddit
