Overusing ‘I Love You’ May Be Hurting Your Relationship, Expert Says

Relationships are important and putting effort into maintaining them is even more essential. There are common things you shouldn’t say to your partner but to find an expert saying “I love you” is one of them is an unexpected turn of events.

Relationship coach Jon Dillow recommended on TikTok that you think twice before saying those three words, and he explains why.

Why you shouldn’t say “I love you”

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Dillow said in his video “If you frequently tell your partner ‘I love you’ I want you to stop.” It’s not because the phrase is bad but because with repetition, the phrase loses its meaning.

You can say it for the first time or during a significant gesture but not after every time you hang up the phone or greet each other, there are other things you can say instead.

The magnitude of the phrase “I love you”

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The first time saying the three-word phrase is a huge step. You are putting yourself out there and you’re being vulnerable in front of somebody you have feelings for, and that person can make you or break you. If all goes well, it’ll be a special memory, the first of many to come.

Dillow has the solution

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Dillow suggested some phrases you can use instead of the universally known three words. The aim here is to express how much this person means to you and how much you appreciate them instead of a general “I love you.”

“I’m looking forward to seeing you”

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Saying “I love you” is all fun and games but saying “I’m looking forward to seeing you” shows the enthusiasm you have to see and spend time with that person. It’s not just about loving them, but also about wanting to spend time with that person whenever possible.

“I so enjoy doing life together”

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Here, it is just not about spending time together, but more about life. This means you love this person so much that you’re willing to share every aspect of your life with them. This phrase is one that has a more profound meaning than the overused “I love you.”

“I’m so thankful to have a partner who – fill in the blank – I hope you know that”

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This one is more about showing appreciation and gratitude. Relationships require love, yes, but they also require respect and appreciation. Letting your significant other know that their efforts don’t go unnoticed elates them and makes them want to give you more.

“I probably don’t tell you this enough but you really make my life better, I’m so thankful to be with you”

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Another way to show gratitude and love is to hit two birds with one stone. This one may be longer, but it is more expressive of how one feels when one’s in love. Such phrases are unique and unconventional, and they can re-ignite the spark in your relationship.

This is not to say that “I love you” is bad

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Dillow goes on to explain that what he says doesn’t mean that the phrase “I love you” is bad, he’s just trying to show everyone more profound alternatives that won’t make the three-word phrase lose its beautiful meaning with time.

The public begged to differ

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Dillow faced some backlash as some people didn’t agree with him, with one saying, “You never know when it will be the last time,” and another saying, “If the person really loves you, they never get tired of hearing the words.”

Follow your heart

@what_healthy_couples_do

Here’s a few more examples of what you could say in place of “I love you.” ? You look gorgeous/handsome in that outfit. I’m looking forward to seeing you tonight (Flirtatious wink) ? When you say/do that it reminds me why I fell in love with you. ? I feel lucky to have you in my life. ? I believe in you. Now it’s your turn. Help us all out and put some of your ideas in the comments. What else could we say to our partners in place of a rote “I love you”? #healthyrelationships #marriageadvice #gottman #datingtips #relationshipcoach #couples #healthycouple #couplesgoals #marriage #relationships #relationshipadvice #relationshipgoals #relationshipproblems #relationshiptips #emotionalintelligence #growthmindset #relationship #change #breakup

♬ original sound – jondillow246

Whether you want to say “I love you” or want to say something else is totally up to you and your significant other. Everyone has their own preferences and humans don’t have a catalogue. In addition, life is short, so live it however you want and do and say what will make you and your partner happy.