Your wedding day or any other important events in your life are moments where you want to have those closest to you present and there to celebrate alongside you. While many people are afforded this opportunity and are blessed enough to have someone be there to celebrate alongside them, not everyone is so lucky.
There are many people in the LGBTQ community who, after coming out and living their truth, have unfortunately lost relationships with families and loved ones who do not “agree” with their life choices.
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Coming out is a very brave and oftentimes, scary experience for many individuals.
Across the United States, 4.3% of adult Americans openly identify as being part of the LGBTQ community. This adds up to being more than 10.7 million members of the LGBTQ community in the U.S.—and, that’s just counting the adults. And, while the community is quite large and receives a ton of love and support, not everyone supports members of this community, unfortunately.
There are many members who, after coming out, become isolated from those closest to them.
For many individuals, coming out is something very personal and scary because not all of their friends and family support members of the LGBTQ community. There are those who lose relationships with people, including their own parents, simply for living their truths and following the path they feel is destined for them. This can be a terrible experience, as many individuals want their parents by their side for special days, like their own wedding day.
Getting married and having your parents “refuse” to come can be heartbreaking.
Finding your soulmate and choosing to marry them is a huge, big deal in an individual’s life. And, getting married and celebrating this joyous occasion is something that people look forward to for their entire lives. Not many people imagine that they would be walking down the aisle or even getting married without their parents there. The situation, in itself, is heartbreaking.
Knowing that many people go through this, one dad on TikTok started a trend that has since gone viral.
Dan Blevins, a dad from Tennessee, began a trend on TikTok as a “stand-in family member” for individuals in the LGBTQ community who may not have someone there to celebrate with them on a very special day, like their wedding day or another special event. Blevins states he doesn’t want people to feel “alone” as though they have no “family there to support them.”
In a viral video posted in 2021, Blevins shared he will “gladly come out and support.”
The video posted on his TikTok channel, @the_zombie_dan, showcased that Blevins wants to be there for couples who may not have their biological parents there to support them. Understanding that many couples do indeed go through this situation, he said to “let him know” so he can come and support the couple on their special day.
Blevins said that they have an entire “network” of people who want to be there.
Of course, Blevins is only one person and can’t be at every single person’s wedding. So, he decided to take this and run with it. Now, Blevins has created a network of “TikTok Stand In Families” full of “moms and dads” who want to be there and support all members of the LGBTQ community. So many, that one of them will surely be able to come, as they are spread far and wide across the world.
Currently, their Facebook page is thriving.
Blevins started a private Facebook community called “TikTok Stand In Families” that has over 35,000 members in it currently. The group is able to share stories, reach out to each other, and even arrange for carpooling, trips, and event travel together as a group. If Blevins hears of a couple who is getting married and he cannot attend, he can reach out to his community and find another stand-in mom or dad for that special day.
The video that Blevins originally posted has since gone viral on the social media app.
Many people in the comments thanked Blevins for all he is doing and for this “wonderful” idea, stating that their own parents turned on them and abandoned them due to their coming out. One commenter said that their parents “turned on them” since they came out as trans and think what Blevins is doing is a “gift.”
Many began to volunteer to join Blevins’ network.
Commenters from all over were sharing their locations and asking Blevins to “sign them up” on his list of “stand-in parents.” Hundreds of commenters supported Blevins’ mission and also wanted to be there to support those that feel most alone during the happiest moments of their lives.
And, others on TikTok volunteered, as well.
Some commenters shared that they may not be old enough to be a “stand-in parent,” but they will be more than happy to be a stand-in auntie or even a cousin to those who need support and love.
It’s so incredible to see what a little bit of love and support on social media can do to bring people together!
