Getting invited to a wedding is an exciting time for many people. Getting to celebrate the “best day” of a couple’s lives is something people hold near and dear. Celebrating a wedding is a truly moving and meaningful experience for many guests who receive invites.
However, not everyone is always invited to weddings. Today, many couples have been rather particular about invites and who is/isn’t invited to their special day, especially with Covid-19 restrictions in place for many places still.
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Smaller weddings have become extremely common across the country.
While big weddings are what many couples want, today, there are tons of couples who have opted to keep things more small and intimate. Smaller weddings have become increasingly popular, especially after the pandemic, where many couples were forced to have small weddings or even postpone their special day due to lockdowns and restrictions.
One thing couples have opted for are “child-free weddings.”
Couples have also begun making their weddings ” child-free .” Some couples worry that having small and young children at their wedding will make their wedding a bit crazy and chaotic. Some worry that kids will cry or run around, ruining photos or even the ceremony itself. Others want their guests to be able to drink, dance, and party, without having to worry about the music being too loud or people being too drunk.
However, some guests find “child-free weddings” to be an inconvenience.
Many guests who have children, but are invited to “child-free weddings” find it to be a major inconvenience to them. While they want to spend the day celebrating the couple, having to arrange for childcare and babysitters can be a really big hassle for some parents. If they don’t have someone who can step in and watch their kids, they have to opt to stay home from the wedding entirely.
One mom recently wrote into a popular parenting blog, seeking some advice on this issue.
One mom, JukEki, wrote into the website Mumsnet , seeking advice on two weddings she had been invited to. Both weddings are “child-free” and said so on the invitations, but in different ways. While she “understands” the couple’s decision, she said that one of the invitation’s wording was “especially irritating” to her.
The wedding invites each had different ways of explaining the “child-free” aspect.
One invite said, “Whilst we love your children please note this is an adult-only occasion.”
The other said, “Unfortunately bearing in mind we have limited guest numbers we cannot accommodate everyone’s children however this is a golden opportunity for parents to enjoy a night of relaxation and uninhibited revelry!”
The mother said the second invite annoyed her.
The mom said while she understands it’s the couple’s prerogative to not have children at their wedding, she hates that the couple won’t “own it.” Instead, the couple is passing it off as if they are “doing any parents a favor” and giving them a “night off,” when in reality, it is “very inconvenient and very expensive” to have to accommodate babysitters and childcare so that they can attend the wedding at all.
Many parents on the blog agreed with this mom.
Some moms on the blog completely agreed with the mom who posted this. They said that they, too, agree that couples can have “child-free weddings” if they choose, but it’s annoying that they want to pass it off as a “favor” to the parents.
“I’m all for child-free weddings, but as you say, just be frank about and don’t dress it up as a favor,” one person wrote.
Another said that they don’t feel bothered as much by the phrasing, as they do the inconvenience.
One mom said that the phrasing seems “tongue and cheek” rather than a jab, but they are more irritated by the inconvenience of “child-free weddings.”
“The hassle of going to a child-free wedding would, and has, bothered me more. Fine if it is close by, but when it means traveling long distances and staying overnight, it’s a pain in the bum,” the mom said.
However, some said that this would not bother them at all.
Some commenters said that they “have to disagree.” Some moms say that they wouldn’t be offended by the wording or phrasing at all, and that they understand some affairs and occasions are just not meant for kids, especially if a wedding is held pretty late at night. No one wants to lose their guests because they need to leave early due to kids’ bedtimes.
And, some said simply: “don’t go.”
Many people on the thread said it’s “silly” to complain about the wording and phrasing and that if going to a “child-free wedding” is such an inconvenience for parents, it’s the perfect excuse to not go at all.
There is nothing wrong with saying that it is “too hard” to make accommodations for your children and that you will not be able to attend because of that.
