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Mom Invites School Principal To Take Her Daughter Shopping After Her Clothes Are Called A ‘Distraction’

by Lex Gabrielle
4 years ago
in Parenting
Reading Time: 5 mins read
A A
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Many schools across the world implement dress codes for their students. When it comes to female students, they’re usually the ones targeted the most by these rules.

Young girls are often told they are “too distracting” in schools simply because of what they wear.

Image credit: Unsplash | Brooke Cagle
Unsplash | Brooke Cagle

In today’s day and age, it can be offensive when girls are told that the way they dress takes priority over their education.

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Sometimes, girls are punished in school for “dressing too provocatively.”

Image credit: Unsplash | Feliphe Schiarolli
Unsplash | Feliphe Schiarolli

Many students are given detention or even taken out of class, causing them to miss valuable learning time.

One mom, Dr. Catherine Pearlman, is speaking out online against her daughter’s school’s biased dress code.

Image credit: Instagram l @catherinepearlman
Instagram l @catherinepearlman

Dr. Pearlman posted a photo of her daughter on Instagram, sharing the shorts she was wearing. As you can see, her daughter’s fingertips go past the length of her shorts which constituted a dress code violation.

Dr. Pearlman is also a licensed clinical social worker and the author of “Ignore It!”, a parenting advice book for dealing with certain behaviors.

She also runs a parenting advice website called The Family Coach , so it’s safe to say she knows what she’s talking about when it comes to issues that affect kids.

Here’s the real kicker of this whole situation: According to Dr. Pearlman, the school doesn’t even have an official dress code policy.

So even without a dress code in place, the school somehow decided her daughter was dressed inappropriately. Huh?

In her original post, she wrote a letter to her school’s principal.

Image credit: Unsplash | Lauren Mancke
Unsplash | Lauren Mancke

The letter said:

“Dear Middle School Principal: Thank you for sending a note home for the second day in a row to say my daughter was dressed inappropriately for school.”

Catherine asked the principal to possibly take her daughter shopping, to see the “selection” of clothing she has.

Image credit: Unsplash | Becca McHaffie
Unsplash | Becca McHaffie

“I’d like to offer an additional thank you for forcing her to change into large mesh shorts that have been worn by only god knows who and potentially never washed…To reward you for treating my daughter with such concern, I am cordially inviting you to take my daughter shopping,” she wrote in her post.

The letter soon went viral, as other parents understood the problems behind some dress code rules.

Image credit: Unsplash | Duy Hoang
Unsplash | Duy Hoang

Dr. Pearlman also asked the principal to help out with her daughter’s “body type.”

“Here are the specifications you have to work with. I wish you loads of luck. She is 5’7″ and 13 years old. Built more like her father, she has exceptionally long legs and arms,” she wrote.

Then, she went into some of her daughter’s clothing preferences.

Image credit: Unsplash | Artificial Photography
Unsplash | Artificial Photography

“She doesn’t like anything pink or purple or frilly. No item of clothing can have a logo visible because to her that’s not cool. She will, however, wear any type of superhero, Green Day or USFL T-shirt if you can find them,” Catherine said.

Let’s be clear: Shopping with teenagers is stressful enough.

The last thing parents need is a super strict dress code thrown in the mix.

After the letter went viral, many people realized how unfair it is to single out girls in schools for their clothes.

Image credit: Unsplash | freestocks.org
Unsplash | freestocks.org

Calling them a “distraction” in schools is problematic.

By speaking out, Catherine’s post encouraged others to share their own body-shaming experiences with school dress codes.

Image credit: Instagram | @sydneyfidhman_
Instagram | @sydneyfidhman_

It seems that no matter how parents and students try to accommodate dress codes, they still get in trouble.

Teenagers also shared their experiences of being dress coded.

Image credit: Instagram | @alexandra41105
Instagram | @alexandra41105

For female students who are growing and developing at a fast rate, a school’s dress code can be impossible to keep up with. Buying new clothes all the time can also put a strain on some families’ finances.

Others said it’s about time people stopped “sexualizing” girls.

Image credit: Unsplash | Daria Nepriakhina
Unsplash | Daria Nepriakhina

“People need to stop sexualizing women’s bodies I can’t wear what I want at school and my mum has no valid reason why showing skin is bad,” said one Instagram commenter.

Dr. Pearlman’s update on Instagram shared that her daughter’s school district has decided to make some changes.

Image credit: Unsplash | NeONBRAND
Unsplash | NeONBRAND

“Anyway as you may have seen the letter went viral. Since then our district (50k students) changed the code and it’s no longer acceptable to say girls are a distraction. The code is also more flexible in what can be worn,” she wrote.

Many commenters online felt that the mom had a very valid point.

Image credit: Unsplash | Brooke Cagle
Unsplash | Brooke Cagle

One person wrote:

“There is no justification for these kind of gender specific rules. It is body shame, period, and it teaches girls that they are responsible for other people’s independent actions.”

I call that a huge win!

Thanks to Dr. Pearlman speaking out, at least one school district has realized how problematic some of these rules are for students and their parents.

Overall, people were happy the school realized their mistakes.

Image credit: Unsplash | Element5 Digital
Unsplash | Element5 Digital

Not everything is meant to be for attention or for male consumption. It’s time for people to end the stigma against young girls.

Tags: Parenting

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