It’s hard not to notice that mothers-in-law tend to get a bad rap since it seems they’ve been made the butt of jokes before many of us were even born.
And in a lot of cases, this can be pretty unfair as there are certainly moms who will go above and beyond for their daughters-in-law.
However, those jokes nonetheless started for a reason because there are no shortage of people who have used this position to intrude into the couple’s affairs and criticize their daughters-in-law under the veil of unsolicited advice . Unfortunately, this seems to be particularly common when it comes to how their grandchildren are raised.
And while it’s hardly uncommon for families to squabble over these matters, it’s not as often that we see someone take matters into their own hands like what unfolded in one story of family drama.
To explain how her situation came to be, the woman we’ll soon hear from said there are some significant cultural differences between her and her husband’s family.
As she wrote in a Reddit post, she tends to stay out of the way when it comes to his family’s traditions. However, one major exception is when one of those traditions involves her children.
For instance, the family seems to largely share the opinion that women are supposed to serve men and neither the woman nor her husband have any intention of bringing their four-year-old son or three-month-old daughter up with this expectation.
But while that’s a pretty major example, it’s not the only tradition involving children that she disagrees with.
The woman said that her mother-in-law has “pestered” her to get her daughter’s ears pierced since the child was born, but she has never been comfortable with this idea.
For her, it’s not because of any pain or because she thinks the resulting holes won’t close back up, but due to the child not getting any choice in the matter.
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In her words, “I’d rather her get to decide when or if she pierces them, when she’s older.”
Since her mother-in-law hadn’t intervened on this matter during the few times she’s babysat the daughter, the woman thought it was settled.
In her words, “I assumed we were safe and that maybe she was respecting our parenting.”
However, this would prove not to be the case one weekend as the baby unexpectedly came home with pierced ears courtesy of her husband’s sister. Although the couple later confirmed with a doctor that this didn’t result in an infection, both the woman and her husband felt their trust had been violated.
And while the woman is not banning her mother-in-law from seeing the child, she no longer feels as though she can leave her alone with her husband’s family.
With the family considering this disrespectful and the husband being on the fence but supportive of his wife, she now wonders if this is an overreaction.
And for the majority of commenters, the pierced ears weren’t the problem so much as the clear lack of respect for the couple’s boundaries.
As one user said , “Don’t feel guilty about this for a second. If she wants to babysit your kids she needs to respect your incredibly reasonable boundaries.”
Another was less sure that the effects of the piercing itself were so temporary, saying , “There’s no guarantees the holes will close up. Mine still haven’t and it’s already been a couple years.”
Some have gone as far as to suggest charging the family members involved with assault, but the woman ultimately considered this to be a waste of time and money.
h/t: Reddit | PatientEase
