It’s so tempting to go to the internet for medical advice. Haven’t we all given our symptoms a google in the wee hours, when the doctor’s office is closed and you can’t stop wondering what the heck is going on?
But there’s a good reason not to. A lot of what’s out there is hokum, baloney, and downright wrong. The best thing, always, is to listen to your doctor. They’ve been to medical school, and they know their stuff.
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It’s astonishing that it has to be said, but doctors are warning women that it’s not a good idea to put parsley in their vaginas.
Medical experts have been speaking out ever since the magazine Marie Claire published an article , since deleted, that suggested using parsley either as a tea or a “vaginal insert,” to stimulate or increase menstrual flow.
“Parsley can help to soften the cervix and level out hormonal imbalances that could be delaying your cycle, helping your period come faster,” the article read.
“If you’re struggling to find a dish based on parsley, don’t panic – the most effective forms are said to be parsley tea and parsley vaginal inserts.”
To be clear, putting parsley in your vagina is dangerous.
“It’s a bad idea to insert anything not prescribed by a practitioner inside your vagina. Your vagina has a natural healthy balance which can be upset by the introduction of foreign objects,” Karin O’Sullivan, Clinical Lead at FPA Charity, told The Sun .
In fact, back in August, a woman in Argentina died after inserting parsley into her vagina.
According to The Mirror , she was trying to induce a miscarriage rather than her period, and the resulting infection ended in tragedy.
What’s more, even if it doesn’t harm you, that parsley won’t do you any good whatsoever.
As Dr. Shazia Malik told The Independent , “There is no evidence of any benefit to a woman of doing this, and clear risk of significant harm as deaths have been reported. I would urge women not to insert anything unless they have taken proper medical advice.”
There is anecdotal evidence on the internet of people trying parsley for their periods.
It’s not promising, either. On the Love, Live, Grow blog, the writer tried to induce her period with parsley to avoid getting it at Burning Man. It didn’t go well. The tea resulted in diarrhea, and the vaginal insert didn’t work.
And just in case it needs to be said, it’s not just parsley that shouldn’t go up there.
“There are only a few things that should go in your vagina and vegetables generally aren’t one of them,” Dr Sheila Newman told The Independent .
“There are ways to manipulate your menstrual cycle and avoid having your period at certain times but they should be discussed with your gynecologist,” she continued.
Marie Claire did issue a statement, with a spokesperson telling The Independent that ” Marie Claire prides itself on well researched beauty and lifestyle stories, with advice sought from appropriate industry experts – sadly this feature does not reflect those standards and we have removed the article. It was misguided and we are sorry our usual care and stringency was not followed.”
h/t The Independent , The Mirror , The Sun
If you thought parsley was bad enough, an online retailer called Pretty Woman came under fire for selling vaginal glitter bombs.
According to their website, glitter bombs are a “unique, innovative new feminine product designed as an alternative to wearing the traditional panty liner.”
Their philosophical aim is to destigmatize vaginal discharge by making it glittery — but the product became a topic of controversy after a top Canadian gynecologist wrote a scathing review on her blog .
Regardless of warning against the glitter bombs, the product still shot out of stock.
Proof that even bad publicity is good publicity when it comes to viral product retailing.
“Could the plastic be a nidus for bacteria? Sure. I’ve seen a nasty inflammatory vaginal discharge from sand so this could be a similar set up.” she wrote.
“Could the vehicle be an irritant and cause a vaginal contact dermatitis? Yes and ouch. Think vaginal sunburn!” she continued.
The images she conjures by simply stating the facts of this product are frightening to say the least.
Marie Claire and Pretty Woman are not the first to make false health claims that have misled an audience targeting women.
In 2018, Gwyneth Paltrow’s company Goop, a health and lifestyle website, was forced to pay $145, 000 after a lawsuit against vaginal eggs was pushed against them.
Goop claimed its vaginal eggs, made of rose quartz, and jade, would cure depression and regulate the menstrual cycle.
However the California consumer’s protection office found otherwise, and won their case against Paltrow’s company.
With nearly a million followers on Goop’s Instagram, plus over five million following Gwyneth herself, pseudoscience and misinformation about women’s health inevitably have serious repercussions.
Between the bizarre nature of these trends, plus the element of virality online, uninformed pseudoscience can cause a lot of harm.
But with that same speed comes professional advice that can debunk trends as quickly as they come — though it seems like it’s up to the consumer of information like this to make the call on what they decide goes into their body, and what does not.
