There comes a point in every young girl’s life when she transitions from being a “little girl” to a “young woman.” Usually, this happens around the teenage years, and it’s when Mother Nature delivers a very “special” present to her for the very first time. As if getting your period wasn’t stressful enough, some girls feel embarrassed and uncomfortable about having to use products for it, too.
Girls who grow up in homes with male siblings often go through some struggles when it comes to that “time of the month.”
Sometimes, brothers will tease their sisters when their time of the month comes around. The moment they see pad or tampon boxes, the jokes come pouring out of them.
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While brothers often tease sisters for things like this, in the end, it usually comes from a place of love.
Most siblings know that the jokes come from a place of love. But, how would you feel if your sons said that your daughter’s use of feminine hygiene products made them “uncomfortable”?
Recently, one father wrote into Reddit’s popular ‘Am I The A**hole (AITA)?’ thread asking if he was ‘wrong’ for his approach on this matter.
The father posed the question to the thread asking, “AITA for telling my stepdaughter to stop using period products in the bathroom she shares with my teenage sons?”
The father started off with some background information on his life with his three sons.
“I have been living with my new wife and stepdaughter for about 6 months now. She’s 19, almost 20, and I have three sons aged 18, 16 and 15. She’s a really good kid and she’s a good influence on my sons, I really enjoy having her around. My wife and her daughter moved into my house and sold theirs. My stepdaughter’s father isn’t present in her life, nor is my sons’ mother. All four children share a bathroom,” he said.
For his sons, this is their first time living with women.
“My sons have never lived for a long period of time with a woman, nor have any of them had long-term girlfriends. They had short visitation periods when they were younger but never longer than an hour, so living with two women has been unusual for them,” he said.
He shared that recently, his 18-year-old son came to him about his “discomfort” with his stepdaughter’s disposal of certain feminine products.
“My eldest son, 18, came to me last week and told me that his stepsister disposes of her used sanitary products in the trash can they share, but doesn’t use toilet roll or sandwich bags to disguise what they are, and it makes him uncomfortable which I think is reasonable. My sons are teenage boys and don’t want to see their stepsister’s period products on full display,” he wrote.
Even though the garbage can has a lid and his stepdaughter was using the products’ wrappers to conceal them, it wasn’t enough.
Apparently, he wanted his stepdaughter to flush the used products or wrap them in a diaper bag instead.
The father decided to talk to both his stepdaughter and his wife. He agreed with his sons that the products shouldn’t be on ‘full display’.
“[My stepdaughter] went on to lecture me about how tampons can’t be flushed and that it’s bad for the environment if she uses diaper bags for every one, which I think is just an excuse. I called her a scruff and told her that this was my house and that what I say goes,” he said.
Even his wife thought he was being ridiculous.
“I later asked my wife if she could have a word with her and she told me I was being ridiculous and that her daughter has had her period for 10 years and knows what she’s doing. When I told her it was making my sons uncomfortable she said my sons needed to get a grip and turned over and went to sleep,” he said.
That’s when he decided to get Reddit’s opinion on the matter.
On the “Am I The A**hole (AITA)?” subreddit, users write in with their problems and community members vote the original poster (OP) into one of three categories: A—hole, Not The A—hole, or Everyone Sucks Here (i.e. a bad situation with no clear winners or losers).
He asked the website’s community if he was wrong for taking this approach and for asking his stepdaughter to change her ways.
Many people on the website said, yes, the stepdad was definitely in the wrong here.
“Sorry but what? I’m a guy and realize this is ridiculous. You need to help yourself and your sons become better men and accept that it’s a natural process.
Are you uncomfortable with your wife’s use of the same? I assume not so teach your sons to be better,” one person wrote in response to the stepdad’s post.
Other people said he is showing his sons the “wrong way” to behave.
“… [Your sons] should be more understanding of her throwing away sanitary products in a place she’s lived in without you for years, you doubled down on the sexism,” one commenter wrote.
After receiving countless comments, the stepdad posted an update.
Ultimately, he did change his tune after reading some of the replies and agreed that he and his sons took the wrong approach to the whole situation.
In fact, it sounds like the whole family got some much-needed period education.
“Not even two hours after I posted this, my wife and stepdaughter gathered my sons and I and gave us a full intensive ‘periods for pr–ks’ course, Powerpoint and all. It was a hoot, they made an interactive quiz and everything. My sons and I learned a lot and apologized to my stepdaughter. Thank you for your input,” he added.
What do you think, was he wrong? It’s nice to know that it seems that this family was able to work things out.
