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Quotes For Those Of Us Who Aren't Kidding Ourselves

I'm not the kind of person who likes to lie to themselves... Well, not very often, that is.

Maybe sometimes I'll look in the mirror and try to convince myself that my roots aren't that noticeable, and sure, I've been living in denial about just how badly I need to buy a new bra for awhile now.

But for the most part, I don't like to kid myself, especially when it comes to my love of food. If I listen closely, I can actually hear my body begging for Doritos and cheese, maybe even cheese melted over Doritos. And who am I to ignore those kind of cravings?

If you're also the kind of person who is super transparent about their obsession with food, I think you're really going to enjoy these quotes.

Let's be realistic here.

I'm sure men are great and all, but no guy has ever given me the same feeling I get when I confirm the waiter I've been watching since he left the kitchen is definitely carrying my dinner on his little platter.

Nothing compares to that.

Even if the answer is "yes", I'm still saying "nope!"

My love language is food, so if you really want to sneak your way into my heart, you'll take me out for pizza and suggest we get a side of cheesy bread.

With dipping sauce, of course. This is a date after all.

Facts.

Look, I'm not saying I would turn down Jason Momoa is he showed up on my doorstep tomorrow with a diamond ring.

But can we all agree marrying Jason Momoa would be like, ten times better if we know with absolute certainty that he can cook?

Better give it what it wants.

I also heard it asking me for chocolate cake so I better go fetch some of that real quick before it accuses me of always ignoring it.

Communication is key, right?

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