A 20-year-old girl is torn between taking care of her four young siblings and pursuing her own life. She often feels like a single mother, and now she wants to move in with a friend and get her own place. But her mom insists she stays, calling her selfish and entitled. Who’s in the right here – should she put her own life on hold to take care of her family, or is it time for her to prioritize herself? Read on to find out more.
The burden of raising five siblings at 20.
Young adult struggles with caregiver guilt and seeks independence
20-year-old struggles with leaving siblings behind to move out
20-year-old wants to move out, mom calls her selfish
A young adult struggles with guilt and responsibility, seeking advice.
A 20-year-old girl wants to move out and stop raising her siblings
Being the oldest of five siblings by eleven years, a 20-year-old girl feels like a single mother as she does the lion’s share of child-rearing for her little siblings. She plans to move in with a friend and get a small flat together. However, her mother calls her selfish and says she can’t move out as she “Needs” her, and she won’t be able to cope alone. The girl feels worried sick about her siblings and how they will fare without her. She admits she lost it when her mother called her entitled and spoiled and told her little siblings how she’s going to be leaving them all behind. She feels like s**t and wonders if she is being selfish. Who’s the a**hole here? Read on for the comments and reactions.
RELATED STORIES
Escape the parentification and live your own life. NTA
20-year-old not the a**hole for not wanting to parent siblings.
Don’t sacrifice your freedom for your siblings. NTA
Divorced mom calls daughter ‘selfish’ for wanting to move out.
Breaking free from parentification. NTA
Breaking the cycle: Young woman chooses not to have kids.
NTA wants to move out, but mom calls her selfish ♀️
Commenter shames mother for neglecting her own child.
NTA. Commenter points out mother’s unfair expectations of OP’s parenting role.
Prioritizing yourself isn’t selfish, it’s necessary.
NTA. Moving out for the safety of her siblings.
Take control of your life and don’t let anyone hold you back!
Commenter describes OP’s mother as a ‘human vending machine’
Live your life Not the a**hole for wanting freedom.
Commenter advises calling social services to report child neglect/abuse ⚠️
Don’t let your mom guilt-trip you, take charge of your life
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/cb62972a-adb2-4805-a482-9727401e5845.png)
Escape servitude to an irresponsible, manipulative AH mother ♀️
An absent dad adds to the burden.
User shares struggles of raising siblings and working part-time.
Move out, stay in touch – NTA for escaping manipulative mother
Taking responsibility for siblings shouldn’t come at the cost of your dreams.
20-year-old forced to raise siblings, father absent. NTA.
Don’t put your life on hold for someone else’s.
Leaving home to stop raising siblings, NTA.
You’re NTA for wanting to move out and live your life
Mom calls her selfish for wanting to stop raising siblings? NTA!
Encouragement to prioritize self-care and pursue personal goals
Free nanny or responsible sibling? NTA wants freedom.
Siblings’ caregiver called selfish for wanting to move out
Commenter suggests involving other family members to help unfit mother
Be a responsible big sister, but don’t forget yourself. NTA
Self-care is not selfish. NTA.
Putting yourself first is not selfish, NTA
Leaving siblings behind, NTA but call CPS for their safety
Understanding the difference between NSPCC and CPS in UK/USA
No one should be a third parent . #NTA
Putting yourself first is not selfish. NTA.
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/045019da-f0de-4876-a09a-6dedc549261f.png)
NTA wants to stop raising siblings, suggests calling CPS.
Empowerment! Moving out to live your own life. #NTA
Facing the dilemma of raising siblings vs. having a personal life.
Taking on parental responsibilities, but NTA for wanting independence
You don’t owe your siblings anything, NTA.
Breaking free from the parentified role – a**hole-free edition
Advice for OP on moving out and safeguarding siblings.
Encouraging words! Don’t let guilt hold you back.
Savage yet funny response to NTA comment thread
Mother expects daughter to raise her siblings, she says no. NTA.
Standing up to an abusive parent and modeling healthy behavior.
Independence is not selfish. NTA for wanting to move out.
Leaving home? Don’t forget to protect your younger siblings ❤️
Leave the toxic environment behind and start a new life!
20-year-old seeks independence from mother’s child-rearing, how?
Commenter sympathizes with OP’s struggle against narcissistic mother.
Don’t let your mom guilt trip you. NTA
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/a1eb91f4-adaa-4528-beaa-b866f306db41.png)
Protecting younger siblings from parentification.
A powerful story of sacrifice and survival, NTA, save yourself
20-year-old being accused of being selfish for wanting to move out.
Take control of your life . Don’t let others bring you down. #NTA
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/3d6fd125-6394-4cc5-8d73-bd7b27a85893.png)
NTA. Moving out and stopping to raise your siblings. Tips included.
This commenter suggests a clever way to avoid raising siblings
Take control of your life and move out. NTA.
Go pursue your happiness, but still offer help for balance
Commenter calls out irresponsible breeding, declares poster NTA
Leaving home to take care of yourself and siblings
Escape the toxicity and start living for yourself
Escape the toxicity , leave and grow!
Parentification is abusive. Mom needs to parent her kids.
Standing up to toxic parenting. #NotTheA**hole
Last Updated on April 13, 2023 by Alfe Mercado
