Meet our conflicted heroine, a 29-year-old woman who’s found herself in a complex love vs livelihood situation. She’s been with her boyfriend for seven years, and they’ve recently moved into a house she purchased. She’s working, but her boyfriend, plagued by anxiety and depression, hasn’t been able to start his work-from-home job. He’s feeling isolated, and their relationship is strained. Now, he’s asking her to take an extended leave from work to help him heal. She’s torn – should she sacrifice her job for love? Let’s delve into her story.
The Love Nest and the Unemployed Boyfriend
The Strain of One-Sided Contributions
Tension Rising: Arguments and Accusations
The Healing Power of Time Together ⏳
The Big Request: Extended Leave for Love
Accusations and Role Reversals
The Dilemma: Love vs Livelihood
The Aftermath: Reflection and Clarity
The Confrontation: Standing Her Ground
Rejection and Accusations: The Fallout
The Threat: Love or Leave?
The House: An Investment in Love?
The Breakup: Sell or Share?
Caught in a Love vs Livelihood Dilemma: What Would You Do?
Our heroine is grappling with a tough decision: should she quit her job to help her boyfriend overcome his anxiety and depression? Their relationship is strained, with frequent arguments and accusations. He believes her taking an extended leave from work could heal their relationship, but she’s not so sure. She’s offered alternative solutions, but he’s rejected them all, even hinting at leaving. As if that’s not enough, there’s the matter of the house they share. He’s invested in renovations, and if they break up, he wants his share. She’s left wondering, should she repay him? Or is there another solution? Let’s see what the internet has to say about this.
RELATED STORIES
NTA: Support him, but don’t become a co-dependent burden.
“Is he really depressed or just taking advantage of you? “
“NTA. Red flags: 32 yr old dating 22 yr old, financially abusive.”
NTA. Don’t be his therapist. Reevaluate this selfish relationship.
NTA – Don’t let his depression hold you back!
“NTA and I see several red flags here. The crazy thing is that it’s so easy for me to justify/ understand his actions but I would never accept those things in myself!”
She’s the breadwinner and maid? NTA, time for Peter Pan to grow up
Helping partner overcome depression: small steps, big impact.
Boyfriend’s manipulative behavior sparks concern.
Don’t quit your job. Focus on his mental health instead.
Commenter expresses concern about partner becoming too dependent.
NTA: Is he getting professional help? No, unfortunately.
Financially supporting boyfriend of 7 years? NTA!
Supportive comment and self-reflection in emotional situation.
NTA: You’re not responsible for his mental health
Therapist’s alternatives can save your boyfriend’s health. You’re NTA!
“NTA. You’re not a therapist or his mommy. You can’t light yourself on fire to keep him warm. He has responsibility too, you shouldn’t be required to suffer without an *equal partner*.”
Supportive comment: Encouraging therapy for partner’s well-being.
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/b3343102-c4b4-4492-ae57-01c6ade85a04.png)
Toxic relationship: NTA’s struggle with emotional abuse and manipulation
NTA: Is he a partner or a leech? Time for therapy!
Homeownership causing relationship strain?
“NTA. Loneliness is tough, but you can’t fix him. “
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/7c54722c-a68f-4482-8bc3-3ae81de2186e.png)
NTA – Don’t sacrifice your mental health for an unsupportive partner.
Age gap sparks laughter and concern in the comments.
Don’t be his therapist. He needs professional help.
NTA – Relationship isn’t a cure-all, encourage professional help.
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/30567991-4cf6-4f40-a729-2e22d6e64278.png)
Don’t drown yourself to save someone else. NTA.
Unbalanced relationship, mental health struggles, and a plea for freedom.
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/c95b4bd6-17c0-4aa3-80da-84fc756487da.png)
OP’s partner needs to grow up and seek help. NTA
A wise comment from a seasoned soul.
Red flags : Offer therapy or reconsider relationship with depressed partner.
Don’t let him stuff his pockets with YOUR hard-earned money!
“NTA. Consult a real estate lawyer to protect your interests! “
Cut the parasite loose and keep your house to yourself!
Curious about why the week off was ‘healing’ for him?
Supportive comment encourages woman to prioritize her own well-being ❤️
NTA. Don’t be his cure. Set boundaries and prioritize yourself.
Supportive comment encourages seeking professional help for partner’s mental health
Don’t be his emotional support animal! You deserve better.
Don’t sacrifice your happiness for someone else’s mental health struggles.
Don’t sacrifice your happiness for someone else’s comfort.
Supportive comment defends independence and calls out partner’s behavior.
NTA: Love or financial burden?
NTA. Mental illness doesn’t have a cure, but it can be managed.
NTA: Don’t let his mental illness control and manipulate you.
NTA tired of people expecting others to fix their problems.
Legal obligations and potential eviction – a tricky situation!
Escape the toxic relationship and find your own happiness.
>While I was the one who purchased the home, he did put in maybe $15-20k into renovations. He mentioned that if we were to break up that I should sell the house and we split the profits or I keep it and we just agree to share the profits from renting it out (I am not from the state we live in and would move back to my home state in a heartbeat)…there is no way I would sell this place, the right thing to do would be to pay him back for what he spent right??
He’s a leech.
Talk to a lawyer about what your (hopefully) ex is owed. He may have put that amount of money down in renovations it doesn’t mean he is necessarily entitled to it back since he was living there rent free and benefited from the renovations. (He is definitely not entitled to any profits you make from renting it out, that’s f**king crazy to even suggest).
Seriously talk to a lawyer from now what about what he is owed. He showed you his true colors, it’s about money for him.
Still NTA
Therapy is the key to fixing him, not your responsibility.
Partner’s confusion: solving vs postponing problems. NTA for prioritizing stability.
Don’t sacrifice your happiness for someone who doesn’t value you.
NTA. Quitting your job won’t cure his anxiety/depression. Be supportive
NTA. Support him, but don’t try to fix him.
Don’t quit your job, help him face his problems.
NTA. Your partner needs professional help for his depression
Don’t let his depression control and limit your life.
Fighting sexism at work while maintaining a loving relationship
Is her partner codependent? Find out in this engaging book!
NTA: Don’t let him undermine your independence and guilt-trip you.
Struggling with mental health, but can’t fix someone else’s problems.
Walking away from a codependent relationship for your own well-being
Don’t be his emotional support animal. Focus on yourself.
Supportive comment suggests mental health screening for partner.
NTA: Stand up for yourself and don’t let him drag you down.
Wishing you the best! Keep us posted!
Don’t be his mom or therapist! NTA
NTA. Partner’s refusal to help themselves can harm the relationship.
Age gap and financial concerns in relationship, but NTA.
Not the a**hole for choosing love over career.
NTA. Emotional support vs enabling: know the difference!
NTA. Mental health requires professional care, not dependence on others.
When love moves in, chores move out. NTA, what a coincidence!
NTA. It’s unfair for him to expect you to fix him
NTA. Protect yourself financially and consult a lawyer for advice.
NTA. Kick him out and live your best life!
Fair compensation for renovations and expenses in a tricky situation.
NTA: Don’t let him manipulate you! You owe him nothing!
“Be strong. You know what needs to be done.”
