Sometimes, life can really feel like the ever omnipresent “man” is beating you down. Things just keep happening in all the wrong ways , you’re hardly able to catch a break, and there seems to be no end in sight!
While I can’t offer advice, what I can offer is solace and the knowledge that you’re not alone. Check this list of people with some majorly tough luck , and know you don’t walk this path on your own.
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A sudden trip.
“Welp, I almost fell into a sinkhole under my porch. I caught myself on the edge of the hole, from my chest down was just dangling beneath me. Below the opening the hole is about 10’ wide and 15’ deep. Fun fact I watched the movie Journey to the Center of the Earth yesterday.”
“Made the mistake of going to McDonald’s for lunch. I did NOT order the McTartare. Hope I don’t die.”
Seeing as you already ate what looks like half that burger, there’s definitely a chance you might die. I’m not a doctor, though, nor am I a meat expert, so take my opinion with a grain of salt and at medium rare at least.
“Down to my last $20, and now I need to fix this.”
What even is that? Can it be fixed? This might be a replace-or-bust situation, in which case, you’ll have to stretch that $20 out about ten times to fix this little problem.
At least you’ll be safe from this happening again for a while!
“Trash can 1, Tiny car -1.”
Your tiny car being at negative one leads us to believe that this has happened before. Is this not your car’s first time losing to a garbage can? It might be getting bullied; if this is happening so often, you should talk to it.
“A lovely note. Happened to me once, so I can relate.”
Yeah, this is a more than acceptable bout of rage for this act of pure evil. I wouldn’t even blame them if they went angrier. I do appreciate the elegance of it though, a simple “try it” at the end is threat enough for this person to know you mean business.
“The coffee I ordered didn’t have any packaging between the glass jars.”
I was going to suggest you just pour the contents of the box into another jar, but then I realized that might mean tiny shards of glass in your next cup of coffee, so maybe don’t listen to me at all.
“Bought a bag of Doritos. All I got was 4 chips and a bunch of the dust compressed into a Dorito nuggets.”
This is an easy situation to turn around. You grind up the flavor nuggets into a powder, put it in a seasoning jar, and boom! Your own shaker full of pure, concentrated Dorito cheese dust! I have no idea what you’d put that on, but you have it now.
“Infected [wisdom] tooth decided to be a bigger pain: four roots vs two. Consult 3 weeks out.”
My goodness, that’s one monstrous-looking x-ray. Not to mention having to sit for three whole weeks with an infected wisdom tooth sounds like hell on earth, but once it’s out, it’ll be the biggest relief you ever feel in your whole life.
“My glass coffee table just exploded.”
As someone whose whole computer setup is on a glass desk, every time I see a post like this I get a little bit more anxious and start to really consider buying myself a new, non-glass desk to help lower the risk of it spontaneously exploding.
“Cooking breakfast in my kitchen, when out of nowhere, a car drives into my living room […].”
Forget coffee, this is a real heart-pumping way to start the day! There’s no way you’ll feel tired after hearing and seeing a car run right into the front of your home. And, unlike caffeine, this energy rush has no crash! Well, there is a crash, but the car kind.
“[Went] outside for an hour on accutane.”
Accutane is one of those medications that, whenever I’ve heard of anyone being on it, they’ve had a different but equally extreme side effect. I’ve heard everything from intense mood swings, to this example right here.
I’m sure it works great for some people, but for the rest, is it really worth it?
“Found this on the street. Someone is going to be disappointed.”
I’d do what people who find lost keys on hiking trails do, surround it with nearby sticks and rocks to draw attention to it. Who knows, the frustrated puzzle-owner might go out to retrace their steps and find the piece still there!
“The handle of the cooler broke as I was carrying down all the drinks I had 20 min before my friends, I haven’t seen in months, arrived.”
My favorite part of this post were all the people in the comments absolutely roasting this guy about his weird stairs, which I was also about to do before I realized so many people beat me to the punch.
They do still look like plywood steps with velcro strips, though.
“End of a hard day.”
For you or the cat? I can’t tell if this was going to be a can of cat food or human food.
On the bright side, a great way to release the stress of a bad day would be to bash on this thing with a hammer, which you’ll now need to get it open.
“My tire fell off with no warning while driving home last night.”
Yeah, that’s generally not something you want happening. As with any employee quitting a workplace, a two weeks’ notice is always appreciated, but not everyone can stand an increasingly-toxic workplace for that long. Maybe see if you can catch him and ask why he left.
A little redecorating.
“My house got hit by a tornado yesterday, it’s heavily damaged but still standing, and nobody is injured. I have no idea how to get the grill out of my pool’s deep end though.”
A never-ending cycle.
“My throat got very big 3 weeks ago and we went to the doctors for it. turns out i have a pretty rare disease that lasts for 4-6 weeks. I got a whole lot of medication for the pain, but i also got some for sleeping. turns out I’m very allergic to it. This is over my entire body…”
“My pop tart was almost half crust.”
Not to mention the icing that is on it looks to be the blandest icing I’ve ever seen on a Pop-Tart. What, is it plain dough flavored? Porridge? Grout, maybe? And the filling, I presumt it’s ground-up bricks?
“So cold in my garage fridge that my milk turned slushy.”
Okay, am I wrong for saying slushie milk is actually kind of good? I’ve had similar situations happen, and every time it’s turned out pretty great. Mix that with some coffee and you’ve got yourself an at-home frappuccino.
“Well, the cat is just rubbing it in, I think.”
You think the cat is just being a jerk, I think the cat is who arrested him in the first place. An animal is the perfect type of undercover cop, especially when said animal isn’t a dog. No one suspects the feline ops unit.
