We’re not so different , you and I. In fact, there are a number of shared experiences that nearly every human being goes through in their life.
But for some reason , they’re seldom talked about. So in an effort to bring us closer together, let’s hash out some specific situations that we’ve all come to experience.
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Why are we afraid of the security sensors at store checkouts?
One time I forgot that I’d accidentally put a stick of deodorant in my back pocket because my basket was overflowing. Luckily the cashier caught my mistake after I’d already finished paying and was incredibly understanding.
I thought I was going to die from embarrassment.
All those times when you just weren’t quick enough.
“i[sic] should get in the shower 2 hours later someone else starts the shower me: oh my god [expletive] you i[sic] was JUST about to get in there.” – Twitter u/@Heissarcastic
Asking someone’s name and immediately forgetting it.
What’s worse is when you let too much time pass that it becomes totally inappropriate to ask the person to restate their name.
To avoid this, try repeating the person’s name immediately after they say it.
Overpacking for a trip.
I just got back from a two-day bachelor trip to a cottage up north, and let me tell you I brought enough clothes to last me two months. The only time I changed was to put on/take off my bathing suit.
A good driving soundtrack is essential.
When I used to have to commute for work, I loved trying to perfectly sync the end of a song with pulling into the driveway and shutting off the engine. It made me feel like Vin Diesel in The Fast and the Furious .
What time is it, again?
“Does anyone else ever pull their phone out to check the time but then have to do it again cuz they forgot to actually look at the clock or am I just stupid?” – Twitter u/@sarahmaloneyxx
A good cardboard box is hard to find these days.
I can actually relate to this so much. And even if you end up finding one at a store, they make you pay for them! A good trick to keep in mind is to head down to the liquor or beer store and ask them for their empty cases.
Flossing your teeth right before a dentist appointment.
I actually have a dentist appointment later on this afternoon and I’m embarrassed to say that I just flossed for the first time in months (don’t judge me). My sink now looks like a horror show and I’m so anxious about letting my dentist down…
When you have to laugh along with your boss’ bad jokes.
Disingenuine small talk is most definitely not one of my strengths. I used to hate my old job at the call center for this exact reason. Our GM thought he was Jerry Seinfeld, when in reality — he was more like Michael Scott.
Zoning out while driving.
Zoning out while driving is a terrifying sensation. I was recently driving up to Toronto to visit family and I flat out don’t remember passing through Kitchener/Waterloo.
I hate driving alone for this exact reason; it’s not safe.
Sharpening a pencil only to have the lead continuously break off every time you touch it to paper.
I always hated pencils. Those grade school years when you had to walk to the front of the class to use the 30-year-old mechanical crank-sharpener were the absolute worst. I was somehow always the kid who broke the lead immediately after spending five minutes sharpening the stupid thing.
When you realize you don’t know the words to your favorite song.
Does anyone remember when Eminem and D12 put out their Devil’s Night album? I was obsessed but I could never figure out why my older brother would always laugh whenever I would rap “Purple Hills.”
I soon realized that I’d been singing the censored version of the song the whole time without realizing it.
Repeatedly biting the inside of your lip/cheek.
The only thing more painful than biting your lip once is repeatedly biting it in the same spot, over and over again. I think we’ve all been Jim Halpert in The Office on at least more than one occasion.
When you don’t want the world to know how out of shape you really are.
Who hasn’t done this before? There’s a park around the corner from my house that has an incredibly steep entrance and in the summertime — it’s a real hike to get back up.
Running out of gas.
Why do people not listen to what their cars are trying to tell them? When the gas light comes on, it shouldn’t be taken as a suggestion. Just get yourself to a station!
Trust me when I say that nothing ruins your day faster than having to push your car to work.
