No one ever claimed that raising a child was easy. Babies are completely reliant on you and need a lot of care all the time. It's stressful! Debates on techniques and methods cause divides in many a relationship.
That's why discussions are so important. Even then, though, they're imperfect. One couple made a compromise regarding changing diapers before they had their first child, but when one half started taking that compromise for granted, it resulted in quite the fight.
That doesn't mean it's all sunshine and rainbows, though. It's filled with hardships and, especially when the child is still young, some pretty nasty moments.
In a post she made on Reddit, user asiam46433 explained that her husband is a "hardcore germophobe." Before the birth of their son, they had agreed that she would handle all the diaper changes as he knew he wouldn't be able to do so with his fear.
It's not an easy job, and the smell would cause her to make some faces.
"[...] every time when I'm in the middle of changing [diapers]. My husband would show up out of nowhere like he busted me or something and tell me that the faces I keep making have an 'impact' on our son's emotional state and [that I] should smile. He'd motion with his hand and be like smiiiiiiiile."
However, he didn't listen, and interrupted her once more.
"He came into the room [...] and once again commented on how my face looked [and reminded] me to smile and 'show love' and stop causing harm to our son's emotional health. I snapped!!!! I walked up to him and told him that he ran out of [chances] to stop his annoying behavior and he should start handling diaper change from now on and we'll see how big his smile will be."
"He's germaphope, yes. But he's also a PARENT. What type of parent never changes their baby's diaper? [...] It took him forever and as I expected he made all types of disgusted, grossed out faces and for a minute I thought he was going to throw up.
"I said he lost the smiling contest with those faces he made. He was pissed and rushed to wash his hands complaining about how I'm trying to get him to do everything."
With the two now mad at each other, she sought out the second opinion of the internet to see who was in the right.
"He's a parent. He is going to have to learn to deal," wrote one user. "Taunting you? That's extremely immature, callous, and arrogant behavior. Nobody is harming a [2-month-old] who can barely register a face by making a face when cleaning up feces."
Another commenter added, "If it was a genuine phobia, he wouldn't have been able to handle it just making faces and retching a little, even that one time. Refusing to help with that particular (essential) aspect of parenting is one thing, judging and [criticizing] how you do it, is another entirely. He sounds absolutely exhausting... [...]."
"He needs to deal with his irrational phobia so that he can more fully participate in parenting and family. If he was agoraphobic, would you allow him to stay at home for your child’s entire life, miss school recitals and soccer games and family vacations, or would you expect him to actually seek therapy?"
Her putting her foot down was likely the best course of action, even if it did cause a rift between her and her husband. That sort of behavior is just unacceptable, especially when raising a child, and hopefully he learned that lesson.
What do you think of the situation? Let us know in the comments!
