Some people excel at taking orders, and will not stop with a request until it is done to the very best of their ability.
However, there are also people who, whether through sheer idiocy or wilful ignorance, simply couldn’t give a rat’s ass about any task they are presented with, no matter how clear the instructions. So, please enjoy these 16+ people who don’t take orders well.
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“Slenderman is crying…”
“Sir, did you not read the sign?”
“But, I’m wearing a mask? I assumed that was a typo?”
“Nope. Now, hold still while I peel your face off with this knife.”
“Jesus Christ!”
“My girlfriend asked me to help with making cookies. I don’t know what got me fired so quick.”
I’d say what probably got him fired was that she spent ages making this precise phallic-shaped cookie and the boyfriend simply make a load of stars. Boring!
“Ask for Tyler…”
I think that this might just qualify as breaking the first rule of Fight Club. I know that they’ve tried to cunningly hide it, but that ain’t fooling anyone!
You’re Doing What Now?
I have so many questions about what was going through the head of whoever put this sign up. But, the main one is just…how?!
This Cat That Couldn’t Sit Still For A Single Panoramic Photo…
I hope that this was a panoramic photo gone wrong anyway, otherwise they really need to start feeding their cat more!
“It’s time for shcool!”
The only way that you could possibly salvage this is by putting quotation marks around it and then attributing it to Sean Connery underneath.
“Whose idea was it to put an elastic band around this…”
This was clearly done by someone who saw the “Please do not bend” message as more of a challenge than a request.
“Local newspaper not quite sure how hyperlinks work.”
This is the future of print media, paper where you can click a link and be transported to a web page.
“My wife doesn’t want our newborn son’s face posted on social media, so she asked me to censor over it. Needless to say, I won’t be asked to do that again.”
Another child tragically suffering from a case of Emoji Face. This is a real illness that the world needs to start taking very seriously!
“I’m pretty sure my mom will never again ask my help with putting away the nativity scene.”
I can’t see anything wrong with these names, aren’t these what the people at the nativity are referred to in the Bible? I’ve definitely read it, I’m just…struggling to remember.
“Or do, I don’t care!”
“So, these boxes think I can’t stack ’em eh! Well, I’ll show them!”
“Dave, please, for the love of God the boxes aren’t challenging you. You’ve already been fired by the post office can you really afford to lose another job?”
“That’s good to hear…”
Well, I would much rather that the spider infestation problem was completely resolved. How do you only “mostly” resolve a situation like this, you’d imagine it would be a pretty straightforward assessment.
“There’s always a loophole.”
All of this could have been avoided if they had just used a hyphen. But, make sure you remember to thank management for this mistake!
“That’s not a wrong idea.”
The beauty of this vague cake decoration is that you can give someone this cake whenever you want and it will never be wrong!
“Locked the door, boss!”
“So, you had a lock right there and yet you decided that this was the best course of action?”
“Have you tried getting that lock out of that packet, they’re impenetrable!”
“Fair point…”
I Think They Might Have Overlooked Something…
“So, to get inside you have to just climb through this window here.”
“But, what about the door right there?”
“Oh no, that’s just for opening if you want some air in. Think of it more of a window!”
“Task failed successfully.”
“That’ll be one dollar.”
“I…I thought it said the coffee was free?”
“Yes it is! Now that’ll be one dollar please.”
“I don’t think you know what ‘free’ means.”
“Door successfully installed.”
Never has there been a more telling example of measure twice, cut once! It’ll still work as a door though…sort of.
“Cursed cutting board…”
Ah yes, I can smell this image through the screen! I bet that this really added to the flavor of the garlic bread!
Dear God, Who Cut This Cake?
No one should ever cut a cake like this! What kind of animal does this to such a pure object?!
“Security gate for private property!”
“But…what if people just cut across the grass?”
“No one will walk on the grass, they’re not animals!”
What In God’s Name…?
“I’m here to paint the floor, not to move forklifts!”
“Seriously? That’s the rock you’re going to die on?”
“Printed the sign, Boss.”
“Dave, are you high?”
“No…?”
“Well why not?! Did you not see the sign?”
A Master Nest-Builder!
I like the way that they are looking at the camera as if to say, “Well, what the hell are you looking at? I’d like to see you do better!”
“Face that’s so handsome it doesn’t need a mask on.”
God damn it guy! Just because you have a smile that could light up a room doesn’t mean you’re above wearing a mask!
“Mom asked for some recent pictures of us for her new house. Naturally, I delivered.”
I’m sure that she will be over the moon with this…wonderful picture! The fact that he isn’t stood directly in the centre of the picture just makes it even more weird and unsettling!
“Saw this at Walmart…”
Just because they’re two bald men who look like they’re composed of a series of basketballs wrapped up in terrible clothing doesn’t mean they are the same!
“This door stopper at my school.”
This stopper had one very simple job, a job that it is failing at! I feel a sort of spiritual connection with this stopper at times…
“Needless to say, mom and dad weren’t too happy with this one.”
“I mean, if you wanted it spelling right then you should have paid extra.”
“There surely cannot be an additional fee for that?”
“There is now.”
“Built the crosswalk boss!”
This crossing is specifically designed for people who exclusively wear two-foot-tall platform shoes.
