Imagine having to face your childhood bully at every family gathering. That’s the reality for one woman (31F) who married her middle school bully’s younger brother. Now, her sister-in-law (31F) isn’t speaking to her or any other family members because she refuses to consider her bully-turned-brother-in-law (31M) as family. Despite everyone urging her to move on from the past, she remains firm in her stance. Let’s dive into the story that has everyone talking.
The Bullying Begins

High School and Beyond

Fate Intervenes

BIL’s Reaction

Years Later

BIL Moves In

Family Dinners

Awkward Interactions

Sister-in-Law’s Outburst

Standing Her Ground

Family Fallout

Moving On?

Her Stance

Unresolved Issues

A Surprising Response

Forgive and Forget? Not So Fast!
This woman is caught in a tough spot. She’s married into a family where her brother-in-law is her former middle school bully, and now everyone expects her to forgive and forget. Despite the pressure, she remains firm in her stance that she doesn’t need to consider him family. With no apology or acknowledgment of the past from her brother-in-law, it’s no wonder she’s holding her ground. But what do people think about this complicated family dynamic? Let’s explore some of the top reactions…
Brother-in-law never apologized for bullying, NTA for not forgiving.

BIL bullies OP as an adult, refuses to apologize. NTA

Brother-in-law is a bully and husband should intervene. NTA

Woman refuses to call bully brother-in-law ‘family’ , but defends marrying his brother.

SIL caused the drama, NTA for not calling BIL ‘family’

Unaddressed bullying by BIL, husband supportive but avoiding confrontation.

Commenter acknowledges everyone is at fault, suggests therapy.

Stand your ground! Family isn’t just blood

NTA. Time doesn’t fix everything. Congrats on keeping it classy

Commenters discuss options for OP’s relationship with her in-laws.

Bullying is not a permanent trait, but empathy can develop

Apology or not, refusing to call bully BIL ‘family’

Woman refuses to call her bully brother-in-law ‘family’

Stand your ground and define your own family

Bullying trauma is no joke, NTA for not forgiving him

Standing up to family bullies: NTA and no fixing needed

Curious about husband’s feelings, but NTA regardless

Bullying scars can last a lifetime, NTA for keeping distance.

Surviving bullying is hard, but marrying your bully’s brother? Epic revenge!

Victim-blaming won’t make the bully brother-in-law family

Commenter defends woman’s choice to not call bully BIL ‘family’

Standing up to family bullies is always NTA

Bully brother-in-law gets what he deserves, not family material

Woman stands up to bully brother-in-law, internet approves
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Bullying’s trauma lasts a lifetime. NTA for not forgiving.

Bully brother-in-law consistently garbage for 2 decades

Commenter supports OP’s decision to not call brother-in-law ‘family’

Forgiveness is a personal choice. Being cordial is enough

Don’t let bullies off the hook, even if they’re family

Navigating family conflict, boundaries, and expectations.

Navigating family dynamics when married to a bully’s sibling ♀️

NTA. Empathizing with OP’s bullying experience and supporting her decision.

NTA. Family reconciliation requires apology. BIL lacks remorse ♀️

Commenter hopes bully doctor works in pathology to avoid people.
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Choosing not to associate with a bully BIL is NTA
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Commenter calls out bully doctor and supports OP.

No apologies, no effort, no family. Cordial is enough

Family drama: NTA, but what about husband’s relationship with brother?

NTA – Brother-in-law bullied her, won’t apologize. In-laws silent.

NTA. Family drama avoided with a solid relationship foundation.

Demanding apology and amends from bully brother-in-law. NTA

Demanding an apology before calling him family.
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No apology, no family. NTA stands firm

Forgiveness is overrated, bullies rarely change. NTA

NTA – In-laws need to acknowledge your valid feelings and BIL’s actions.

NTA. SIL’s expectations for relationship with bully BIL are unrealistic.

Brother-in-law is still a bully, NTA for not accepting him

Bullying survivor stands with OP, NTA!

Choosing to be cordial with a bully is not petty

Sibling-in-law drama: NTA refuses to call bully BIL ‘family’

Brother-in-law excluded her from family, NTA for not reciprocating.

Respectful relationship with BIL, entitled to feelings about family status

Standing up to family bullies. NTA

No obligation to play happy families with unapologetic bully

Forgiving past bullying, but drawing the line at hurtful comments

Standing up to family bullies is never easy

NTA stands up to bully brother-in-law, demands apology

Blood doesn’t make you family, marriage sure as hell doesn’t either

Bullying’s long-term effects are real. NTA for setting boundaries.

Simple and clear judgement: Not the a**hole!

No apology, no family. NTA stands their ground

Facing the past can be tough, but it’s necessary #NTA

Polite but distant: Dealing with an unapologetic bully brother-in-law

Commenter is not the a**hole in this situation
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/850afaba-160a-4590-81f5-0fcc54dff2c0.png)
NTA stands up against family bully, demands apology

BIL bullied her, never apologized. Cordial is best he gets.

NTA stands up to bullying brother-in-law, sets healthy boundaries

Forgiveness is earned, not demanded. NTA for setting boundaries.

Family ties strained by unapologetic bully brother-in-law. NTA.

Bully brother-in-law? Not family. NTA for cutting ties.
![Image credit: [deleted] | [deleted]](https://static.diply.com/16ca8d51-2249-4dcc-b741-327f99808973.png)
Commenter defends NTA’s decision to not call bully BIL ‘family’

Validating NTA comment, acknowledging difficulty of situation

Dealing with a bully brother-in-law, stay cordial?

Medical professional should know better. NTA, demand apology.

Bully brother-in-law causes family feud, NTA stands her ground

Brother-in-law’s bullying backfires, sister-in-law stands her ground. NTA

Bullying leaves deep scars, NTA for not calling him family

BIL hasn’t changed, family toxic, move or avoid interactions.

NTA, family should hold bully accountable for his actions.

Standing up to family bullies: Hard NTA

Forgiveness is possible, but not without reconciliation and effort ✌️

No apology, no family. NTA stands her ground
