Family Praises Deceased Uncle, But I Can't Pretend He Was a Good Guy

A tomb stone with flowers.
Unsplash | CA Creative

At my uncle's funeral, everyone was singing praises of his selflessness but I knew the truth. He had a habit of making his nieces feel uncomfortable and constantly pursued younger women. I shared my thoughts with the family, but they didn't take it well.

Was I in the wrong for exposing his true intentions, or was it important to speak up for the women he made uncomfortable? Read my story on AITA.

Uncomfortable truth: Uncle's creepy behavior towards nieces exposed 🤢

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

A finance guy who only surrounds himself with attractive women 🙄

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Uncle's behavior around young women is questionable and uncomfortable.

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Focusing on work achievements at a funeral 🤔

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Remembering a controversial figure: family praises deceased uncle

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Party invite leads to unexpected drama 👀🎉

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Reluctantly invited to party by deceased uncle's naive daughter 🎉

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Unwanted uncle crashes party and ruins the vibe 🤦‍♀️

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Uncle offered to help host with interior design, but why? 🤔

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Uncle's true colors revealed in unsettling interaction with female friend.

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Skeptical of deceased uncle's supposed good deed, calls out motive.

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Calling out the truth about a deceased family member 💔

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Navigating family dynamics and morality, am I the a**hole?

automaticyak3618 | automaticyak3618

Deceased uncle praised for kindness, but was he really good?

In this post, a man shares his experiences with his deceased uncle who had a habit of leering at his younger nieces and only hanging out with much younger, attractive women. The funeral service mainly focused on the uncle's work accomplishments and his selflessness, but the man couldn't help but feel like his uncle's true intentions were being overlooked.

The man shares a story about his uncle helping a 19-year-old friend of his cousin move furniture, but suspects that his uncle used his female friend to make the young woman feel more comfortable about him coming over. When the man brings up his suspicions, he is met with shock and disapproval from the rest of the family.

The man is left wondering if he was in the wrong for speaking out. Read on for comments and reactions to this controversial situation.

Being honest about a deceased family member, even if it's not pleasant 👍

Electric_Tampons | Electric_Tampons

Outing a creepy uncle and the adults who turned a blind eye 👀🚫

Skippy2716 | Skippy2716

Acknowledging the truth about a deceased relative and supporting victims. ✊

[deleted] | [deleted]

Deceased uncle's true nature questioned, NTA for speaking truth

xgozax | xgozax

Speaking up at a funeral - ESH or necessary closure? 🤷🏼‍♂️

[deleted] | [deleted]

Commenter criticized for speaking ill of deceased uncle at funeral.

jpcats | jpcats

Did OP have a chance to confront uncle's behavior?

Cent1234 | Cent1234

Being honest about a deceased relative. 💯

[deleted] | [deleted]

Maternal grandfather was an AH who sexually abused his daughter. NTA.

MysticJediLady | MysticJediLady

Debate on confronting deceased uncle's true character at funeral.

dk3001 | dk3001

Sharing your perspective on a deceased relative's behavior 💭

AnonAndHappy | AnonAndHappy

Speaking out against lecherous behavior 👊🚫

fluffypinkblonde | fluffypinkblonde

Don't speak ill of the dead, even if they were bad 🤐

[deleted] | [deleted]

Calling out OP's cowardly behavior with a touch of humor 😏

Jack_Russo | Jack_Russo

Breaking the code of silence on creeps needs support 👍

no_no_nora | no_no_nora

Is speaking ill of the dead at their funeral ever okay? 🤔

snorglehorf | snorglehorf

Deceased uncle praised, but OP struggles with his true character. 😕

pixelunicorns | pixelunicorns

Standing up against sexual abuse at a young age 🙌🏼

Plantsandanger | Plantsandanger

Deceased uncle was a creep, but YTA for speaking at funeral 😬

-lufepoh- | -lufepoh-

Calling out inappropriate behavior towards kids, NTA wins!

FirebirdWriter | FirebirdWriter

Speaking out against abuse - important for healing 💯

bubblessugarcheeks | bubblessugarcheeks

Death doesn't absolve a**hole behavior 💀

YeetusDeletus-Feetus | YeetusDeletus-Feetus

Commenter criticized for speaking ill of deceased uncle at funeral 🤐

fuck2020intheeye | fuck2020intheeye

The ugly truth behind praising the deceased 💀💰

chatondedanger | chatondedanger

Speaking ill of the dead? NTA says it's okay 👌

Im_not_nice81 | Im_not_nice81

Speaking up earlier could've avoided this awkward situation 😬

Hannnaaj | Hannnaaj

Accusation of uncle's behavior causes family tension. YTA.

AndrewWaldron | AndrewWaldron

Sometimes honesty is the best policy 🤷‍♂️

va_texan | va_texan

Honesty over loyalty? Family values questioned. 🤔

chakabuku | chakabuku

Commenter defends their criticism of deceased uncle, no drama ensued.

ExitingBear | ExitingBear

No pretending necessary, NTA! 👍

levraM-niatpaC | levraM-niatpaC

Don't be shotty and expect a good funeral reputation 💀💩

[deleted] | [deleted]

No sympathy for a deceased pervert. 💀

TheDukeOf_Donuts | TheDukeOf_Donuts

Breaking the stereotype: Attractive women in finance industry. 💰💄

HelloYouSuck | HelloYouSuck

Calling out a deceased predator - NTA 😠

vali_riversong | vali_riversong

Commenter receives backlash for calling deceased uncle a pig 😬

[deleted] | [deleted]

Calling out a deceased relative's manipulations. NTA 🙌

PasDeTout | PasDeTout

Praise for uncle met with harsh truth in comment section

Square-Concept | Square-Concept

When a controversial person dies, is it wrong to speak the truth? 🤔

DrPikachu-PhD | DrPikachu-PhD

Acknowledging the truth about a deceased abuser 👍

Qi_ra | Qi_ra

You're not the a**hole! 👏

JustAReminder1194 | JustAReminder1194

Funerals are for the people left behind, not the deceased 💔

BiryaniGaming | BiryaniGaming

Standing up against family defenders of creepy uncles 👏

_stelmaria | _stelmaria

Dealing with a deceased abusive parent, grieving for a lost childhood 😔

talkabi | talkabi

Hypocritical glorification of the dead: outdated or respectful?

nebunala4328 | nebunala4328

Why do we pretend bad people were good? 🤔 #NTA

iceyone444 | iceyone444

Why do we pretend bad people were good just because they died? 🤔

Jekyll_1886 | Jekyll_1886

"Death doesn't erase flaws." 🙌

angstywench | angstywench

Deceased uncle praised by family, but commenter remembers abuse. #NotAGoodGuy 😔

ThrowAwayAnyMouse | ThrowAwayAnyMouse

Validating younger family members brings joy. Spread positivity! ✨

[deleted] | [deleted]

A blunt and controversial comment about a deceased uncle.

[deleted] | [deleted]

Calling out family's hypocritical eulogy at a funeral. 🤔

cashmerejasmine | cashmerejasmine

Honesty is the best policy, even when it comes to the deceased 💯

---jordan--- | ---jordan---

Honesty is the best policy, even when it comes to the deceased 💀

[deleted] | [deleted]

Uncle's dark past exposed: NTA for speaking the truth 💔

[deleted] | [deleted]

Facing family delusions: honesty over placation 💯

BDThrills | BDThrills

Commenter praised for not pretending deceased uncle was good guy

SnooMemesjellies7547 | SnooMemesjellies7547

Funeral not the time to speak ill of the dead 💀

Werpoes | Werpoes

Speaking up against a creepy uncle. NTA 👏🏻

2manycandles | 2manycandles

Speaking ill of the dead? NTA, younger cousins agree 🤔

ima420r | ima420r

Standing up against creepy uncles - NTA! 👏

muhanX | muhanX

Honoring the dead: A thoughtful approach 🙏

Tricorder2 | Tricorder2

Being a rock-star aunt/uncle is the ultimate goal! 🌟

rednrithmetic | rednrithmetic