Parenting is a tough job , and not every person does it the same way. In fact, there are many parenting methods people swear by. Some folks choose to be very easygoing with their kids, while others lean towards a striker upbringing. Neither one is wrong in my book.
But when a mom shared a few things she allows her kids to do, somehow she got flack from other parents. So let’s see exactly what she said.
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#1 – Boundaries
Cassandra, who’s a mom of four, recently went to TikTok . She shared a few parenting ideas that have raised eyebrows from fellow parents. This is the stuff that works in her family and she was happy to share them with her TikTok audience.
“My child does not have to give you a kiss, does not have to hug you, does not have to hang around you, does not have to do anything with you if they choose not to.”
Wow! What do you think of that? I love this idea.
#2 – This Understanding
“My kids can love/be with whoever they want. Color, race, gender, nationality. It does not matter. They can love and be with whomever they want, as long as they are treating each other right. That goes for my child treating them right and them treating my child right.”
Amen to that.
#3 – This Controversial Subject
“Our kids are allowed to swear. They know when they can swear, how they can swear, who they can swear around. They’re allowed to swear. If you think that the worst thing your child can do is swear, then you have another thing coming. I said what I said.”
This might be controversial to some but in the end, it sounds pretty harmless, no?
#4 – This Self-Defense
“If your kid hits my kid, my kid will knock your kid out and I will high-five them.”
Speaking of controversial ideas, here’s one for you. I definitely don’t condone violence, but this mom does have a point. In my opinion, kids should know how to defend themselves. That’s all.
#5 – This Bullying Response
“If my kids see anybody being bullied they’re to step in and help. It is not okay for any kid to put down another kid ever. I said what I said.”
As somebody who has experienced bullying as a child, I applaud this approach.
#6 – This Religion Stance
“My first two kids I baptized, but my last two kids I did not baptize. I will allow them to choose if they wanna follow a religion, if they wanna believe in God, if they don’t wanna believe in God. Whatever they feel is best for them.”
I agree with that.
#7 – Equality
“Our kids are to treat everybody equally while at the same time, know that everybody is not treated equally. If you understand what that means. We tell them to see color and not to ever say, ‘I don’t see color,’ because you do, you treat everybody the same, the same way you would treat a homeless person staying on the corner of the street is the same way you would treat the president of the US.”
I wish more people would see that.
#8 – This Teenager Approach
“If my kid, teenager, is out and they’re drinking with friends, and they call me, and they say: ‘Hey mom, I need you to come get me,’ I’m gonna get up and I’m gonna go get them. We will not talk about it until the next day. Let’s face it, peer pressure is real, and people can’t learn unless they make mistakes or do something they’re not supposed to do.”
I would totally do that too.
#9 – This College Choice
“College. We will not force our kids to go to college if they don’t want to. Let’s face it, nobody really knows exactly what they wanna do, ever.”
Truth is, not everybody is college material. And sometimes you learn more out in the world anyway.
#10 – This Sex Ed
“We teach our kids at a young age what sex is, what their parts are, what drugs are, everything. We teach them everything at a very young age. That way they know what the consequences are. They know what the actions are, they know what the positivity to everything is, and they don’t ever have to be ashamed of who they are.”
I love that!
#11 – This School Break
“If my kid needs a mental health day from school, whatever it is, I’m gonna let them take it. They don’t have to be sick. We don’t have to have something to do. We don’t have to have any of that. For my kid to stay home, all they have to do is say: ‘Mom, I need a day to myself. I need a mental health day.'”
My mom actually allowed me to do that and I’m so grateful to her for that.
#12- These Emotions
“My son is 18 and I have taught him that if he wants to cry, then let them tears fall. It is okay to cry and let them tears fall. This misconception of telling men that they need to man up or that they’re not a man because they’re crying is [nonsense]. That is the reason why a lot of men are the way they are as far as not being open and being in touch with their feelings, and not all but some men.”
Kudos to this mom for recognizing that.
#13 – Self-Expression
“Tattoos and piercings. Our kids are allowed to get piercings and they’re allowed to get tattooed, with one exception for the tattoo. They have to wait till they’re at least 16 and they have to have pondered on it, really thought about what they wanted, a good place for it to be at, and as long as the shop allows it at that age. Piercings, I feel like it’s a way they express themselves. I don’t see anything wrong with piercings.”
I got my ears pierced when I was about 10 while my mom was getting her hair done, haha.
#14 – These Hygiene And Beauty Issues
“I will allow my daughters to wear tampons. And I will teach them the proper way to wear tampons. I’m gonna tell you why. When I started my period, nobody had taught me how to wear tampons, and I was told I was not allowed to wear them, but I did because I wanted to be in my swim class. You know what happened? It got stuck. So I had to go to the emergency room and be embarrassed and have them take it out because I left the cardboard on.”
Yikes!
“Makeup. I never used to allow my daughters to wear makeup because I wanted them to see their beauty for what it really was. Being their natural self. But now I realize, no, I’m gonna allow them to try makeup if they wanna try it.”
Nice!
#15 – This Open-Mindedness
“Our kids are allowed to wear what they want. It’s their body, their style, their choice, whatever they wanna wear, they can wear.”
I definitely support that as long as the clothing is occasion appropriate, of course.
#16 – This Curfew Stance
“My kids don’t have a curfew. They respect that they have to be home at a reasonable time, and most of the time they’re always at home anyways.”
Guess what? I never had a curfew either, and I still turned out alright, hehe. There’s something called “trust” and if you give it, you will receive it back.
#17 – This Open House Rule
“People of the opposite gender staying the night. We allow it. Yes, we do. And I’m gonna tell you why. Because there are some kids out there that don’t have homes to go to or their parents kicked them out or stuff in that instance.”
I can definitely see where she’s coming from here.
#18 – This Life Support
“My kids will be allowed to live in my house bill-free after they turn 18 and whenever they’re ready to move out, they can go after the age of 18. However, I will not make them move out.”
Coming from Europe this is pretty typical. Back at home, people don’t kick their kids out just because they turned 18. That was shocking to me when I came to North America. Not everybody has their life figured out at that young age.
So, what do you think of these rules?
Do you agree with them? I have to say, for the most part, I can see where this mom is coming from, alright. These might seem controversial to some, but I definitely get her reasoning here.
She seems like a very loving mom who genuinely cares about the health and well-being of her four kids, and you can’t go wrong with that.
