As heartbreaking as it is for some people to think about, there can be any number of reasons why a family doesn’t stay together.
Sometimes a parent will disown their child if they grow up to contradict that parent’s values , while some children will intentionally lose contact with their families once they’re old enough due to problems they saw in their upbringing.
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But while it’s not exactly impossible for estranged parents and children to reconnect later in life, that’s something that both parties have to want and something that can only last long if it involves a serious mutual understanding of what went wrong.
If it’s happening more because the parents in question want to see their grandchildren , that’s usually not lost on the estranged child. And since that’s what one woman is suspecting in her case, she’s set quite the barrier of re-entry.
The woman we’re about to hear from grew up in a family that had a rigid idea of traditional gender roles.
As she explained in a Reddit post , this meant that her parents would not let her be anything besides a housewife. So while they paid for every college expense her three brothers would incur, the woman was explicitly told that she wasn’t even allowed to go to college.
Nonetheless, she applied to one in secret and was awarded a partial scholarship. So she spent some time planning her escape and waited until the week before she moved out to inform her parents she was leaving.
This meant that when she went for her engineering degree, she had only what some friends had given her and struggled to work and fulfill her scholastic obligations at the same time.
But while this arrangement would put her in debt, she nonetheless succeeded and is now on track to start a family of her own.
Although she hadn’t spoken to her parents in years by the time this new family was in the works, they recently contacted her. After they met in a park, they said they were sorry “if they caused [her] pain” and wanted a relationship with her again.
As the woman put it, “I asked them specifically what they were sorry for. They wouldn’t elaborate and just said they wanted to move forward.”
That wasn’t going to cut it for the woman, so she said the only way this could happen is if they give her the same $100,000 they would’ve spent for her education if she was a man.
Although her mother cried at this and her brothers have since called her immature and hurtful, the parents refused these terms.
She feels as though she acted reasonably, but reached out to Reddit to see if she’s wrong for thinking so.
But as far as the majority of commenters could tell, there isn’t much reason to believe her parents are any different from the people she left behind.
As one user said , “As far as I can see, your answer to them was perfect. It was very fair, and if they have fixed their appalling bigotry issues, they would be falling all over themselves begging you to take the money. Since they clearly have not fixed their bigotry, you don’t want them around your child.”
Another agreed, believing that they just wanted contact with any future grandchildren. As this person put it , “Thats a generic ‘Sorry you’re upset’ non-apology. They are just around now because they want to influence the baby.”
h/t: Reddit | DaisyChained89
