Dating today can be a really tough journey. Since there are so many things that women are looking for in a life partner, it can be hard to check all of those boxes. Many women compromise and give up some of their “wants” in a man. However, there are some qualities that they just cannot look past.
Sometimes, personality traits, habits, and qualities instantly turn us off to a person. It’s those “red flags” we just cannot get around. While you may think, “Nothing can be that bad!” we bet that you’ll look through this list and find yourself saying, “Yup, same!”
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Spitting
Jodi Manship and many others agreed that spitting is definitely one trait that turns us off completely. No one wants to be taking a walk with someone and all of a sudden, they turn to the right to spit a loogie on the ground. It’s gross and also unsanitary!
Lack of empathy
Compassion and empathy are two huge qualities that everyone looks for in a life partner — or even someone to casually date. Empathy is an attractive personality trait, as is caring about others and seeing the bigger picture in life. No one wants someone being obsessed with themselves and stuck in their own bubble.
Moving too fast
Sharon Kay Scruggs wrote that when a man wants to come over to your house too quickly or vice versa, it’s a turn-off. No one wants to be pressured to move too quickly and be pushed beyond their comfort zone. Plus, there are some obvious reasons that they want to come over so soon.
Smoking
Smoking is a habit that can die hard with some people. There are many individuals in the world who could never date someone who smokes. Not only does it give off a foul odor, but it is also unhealthy for him and for those around him, too.
A big ego
Em Kate Ebert admitted that when a man talks about himself constantly, it’s a no-go. Let’s face it: some men just have huge egos, and they think that they are the greatest gift that life has to offer. Newsflash: they’re not! Dating someone who constantly talks about themselves and only wants to discuss their life can get stale and boring quickly.
How they treat certain people
Emma Woolliscroft pointed out a big one: how a man treats a service worker. A huge tell-about someone is how they treat customer service people — waiters, valet workers, gas station attendants — and anyone providing a service. If someone is rude and nasty to them, it shows that they feel the job and the person is “below them.” Hard pass.
Being too clingy
Everyone needs space, despite wanting to be in a loving relationship. There has to be a good balance between spending time together and getting some alone time. No woman wants to be with a man who wants to spend every waking moment with you — you need some space. A clingy guy is a needy guy and no one has time for that!
Trying to control you
Anna Ramström shared that when a guy is too controlling, it’s definitely a turn-off. We are our own people, despite dating someone else. When someone wants to control your every move — e.g., tries to order for you, makes plans without confirming with you, or speaks for you — it’s definitely a “no.” You need someone who respects who you are, not who they want you to be.
Bad breath
Dental hygiene — and hygiene in general — are important factors in a person’s appearance. Having foul breath and not taking good care of your teeth can be the first thing a person notices. Who wants to lean in for a kiss when a guy’s mouth smells like the dump? Not us!
Constant complaining
Ellen Welch admitted that when a guy complains all of the time, it’s grounds for “nope.” We all have problems in our lives, we all have reasons to complain. But why do we want to hear about it constantly? No one does. If everyone walked around complaining all of the time, everyone would be miserable.
Wandering eyes
If you are with a guy, you want his eyes to only be on you. Jennifer Falvo Currao shared, as did many others, that a guy who looks at other women is definitely not the guy you want to be with. If his eyes aren’t on you, what are you two even doing together? A woman should feel lifted up by her man, made to feel like she is the only one in the room. No girl wants to have their boyfriend or husband looking at the woman sitting at the table next to them.
Lack of ambition
Many women pointed out that a guy who is complacent and lacks drive can be a huge red flag. We want to be with someone who is a go-getter, who wants to get further in life and provide for himself and his woman. Lazy guys can be huge turn-offs because we don’t want to sit around and have the same old, day after day. Watching a man succeed and be hungry for success can be a turn-on!
Sneaky snakes
Laci Lou revealed that it’s a huge no-no whenever a taken man goes out flirting and speaking with other women as though they’re single. No woman ever wants to be the other woman, and when guys manipulate their life story to get us into that messy situation, it’s not only a turn-off but absolutely revolting.
Lack of respect
All women want to be treated as equals in any relationship, whether it be a romantic relationship or a friendship. When a guy lacks respect, and talks down to women because they feel as though men are superior, no one needs that. No woman wants to hang out with a man who preaches misogyny and male privilege.
Living at home
Cortney Renée shared that unless a man is living with their parents because they are taking care of them for a health issue, there is no world where it’s okay for an adult man to live at home with his mom and dad. It showcases a huge lack of responsibility and independence if a person can’t rent or own their own place. Of course, if they are helping care for their parents, that’s a different story. But, shacking up at home in your childhood bedroom? Pass.
Being too jealous
A little jealousy here and there can be healthy and even sexy. But too much jealousy can be crazy and controlling. When a guy gets jealous, it can be for a plethora of reasons, including a lack of confidence. When someone is insecure, it can bleed into a relationship and become really unhealthy.
