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    Dad carrying child on his shoulders (Unsplash | Kelly Sikkema)

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Friendships Have Red Flags Too, So People Are Pointing Them Out

by Jordan Claes
4 years ago
in Online Communities
Reading Time: 5 mins read
A A
Unsplash | Ball Park Brand

Unsplash | Ball Park Brand

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I once read something that said our friends are the family we choose; I always liked that. For isn’t the ultimate goal in life for our friends to be our family and our family to be our friends ?

However, not all friendships are meant to last while others should be broken immediately. It turns out that friendships have red flags too, and now people have begun pointing them out.

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Not being able to apologize.

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Refusing to apologize or being unable to accept when you’ve done wrong is a serious personality red flag. This is often indicative of an overinflated ego that will eventually infiltrate every layer of your relationship.

Excessive alcohol use and substance abuse.

Image credit: Unsplash | Adam Wilson
Unsplash | Adam Wilson

Everyone likes to party and have a good time every now and again. But if you have a friend who cannot enjoy themselves without drugs or alcohol, you may want to keep an eye on them.

“One-upper friends.”

You know the kind I’m talking about. They’re the kind of person who tells nearly the identical story that you just told, only slightly better . This is without a doubt one of my biggest pet peeves.

“Always asking for favours[sic] but never there when you need them to return one.”

Image credit: Unsplash | why kei
Unsplash | why kei

Do you have a friend who always seems to forget their wallet whenever you go out to eat? Do they ask to borrow your car or have you drive them around and don’t even have the decency to pay for gas? If you answered yes, then you have a user on your hands.

When they spend every minute you’re together totally absorbed in their phone.

Image credit: Unsplash | NordWood Themes
Unsplash | NordWood Themes

I’m not saying that there isn’t a time and a place, but if you just came over to my house so that you could play Fortnite in a slightly different setting — I don’t want it.

When someone can’t celebrate the other person’s success.

“Friends that only care to talk about their own success and aren’t genuinely happy for you and yours unless it amounts to less than their own,” wrote Reddit user 313JoJo

If they steal from you.

Image credit: Unsplash | Tyler Nix
Unsplash | Tyler Nix

I am hoping that this would already be painfully obvious to the majority of people here. But for those who are still holding on to false hope, a real friend will never steal from you, under any circumstance.

Turning green with envy.

“Really jealous and possesive[sic] friends. I’m a jealous person by nature, and even though my jealousy flares up when I see my friends hanging out with other people, I would never let them know.” Reddit u/user

Friends who only seem to pick up the phone when they need something.

Being a good friend means picking up the phone when a person calls you. Odds are, it’s something important that they need to discuss or get off their chest. So try and not to be so selfish next time.

When they don’t have your back in social or group settings.

Image credit: Unsplash | Samantha Gades
Unsplash | Samantha Gades

“Friends who are good to you when one on one but constantly put you down In group settings. This is a big sign of insecurity/jealousy,” Reddit user -MattTheRat- said.

Friends who constantly ask for advice but never heed it.

I’m not saying you have to listen to every word I say or treat it as gospel, but stop involving me in your stress if you’re not going to listen to a single word I say. I’m not here for your drama.

Loose lips sink ships.

Image credit: Unsplash | Adam Winger
Unsplash | Adam Winger

“Friends who gossip excessively. If they’re talking about other people, chances are they’re talking about you ,” explained Reddit user Jalaphi23.

Gossip is toxic; plain, and simple. Best to avoid it at all costs.

When they stop bringing out the best in you.

Image credit: Unsplash | Ben Wicks
Unsplash | Ben Wicks

It’s a fact of life that important people will come and go. Not all friendships are meant to be forever and that’s OK. How long you’ve known someone isn’t a badge of honor if you can’t even act like yourself in their presence.

When they don’t ever share in your interests

Image credit: Unsplash | Jed Villejo
Unsplash | Jed Villejo

“Being dismissive of all your interests and achievements. Meanwhile everything they do, no matter how mundane , is amazing,” said Reddit user TijuanaMccrory.

Friendship isn’t one person constantly giving 90% while the other person gives 10%.

Friends who get angry at you for having other friends.

Nothing can be more stressful than when you’re the mutual friend of two others who can’t seem to get along. What’s worse is when they try to guilt you for spending time with someone other than themselves.

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