In the case of big families, Thanksgiving dinners come with a lot of fun and drama. Perhaps it’s the alcohol courage at the table or years of built-up resentment coming to a head at the sight of triggers, but something encourages people to spill secrets during this holiday.
A Reddit user shared his story on Am I The A-Hole about walking out on thanksgiving dinner for a similar reason. His story caused a debate as other Redditors weighed in on the disrespectfulness or otherwise of the situation.
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The Redditor explained that he’s one of two sons born to his Italian mother, who wanted a girl. It didn’t help that he and his brother also had sons, so their mother transferred her affections to a neighbor’s daughter.
Throughout their childhood, the Original Poster (OP)’s mother became a foster mom to the neighbor’s daughter, Lily. She taught Lily to speak Italian and French and paid her private school tuition.
Once the boys came of age, they left home and built their own families, but they visited during holidays. Meanwhile, Lily stayed at home and became even closer to their mother. This thanksgiving, the Redditor and his sons visited as usual with plans to stay for a few days, but a disagreement thwarted those plans.
According to his story, he parked in the driveway upon his arrival, but when Lily got home later that day, his mother asked him to move his car to the street and allow Lily to park inside because “that’s her spot.” The Redditor packed his things and left with his children.
Now he wants to know if he overreacted.
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With this dilemma, Redditors split their analysis, with one group supporting him for leaving and another saying he overreacted. Let’s look at both sides.
Group one supports the Redditor based on years of feeling like a second choice to his mother, especially to a fostered child who had her own family. Frankly, I’m with this group because the mother made her choice when she favored Lily over her boys for whatever reason, and there comes a time when something has to give!
The other group mentioned Lily’s devotion to their mother, saying they built a close relationship based on mutual acts of service. However, that’s not enough reason for the OP’s mother to fuss about parking in the driveway.
Since Lily lived there, it wouldn’t hurt to accommodate the “visitors” for the holiday until they left in a few days, but the mother couldn’t help herself.
She showed her favorite once again and expected her son to roll over as usual. Too bad he got tired of that!
If she wants a relationship with her boys and grandsons (before it’s too late), she should give them equal treatment. I know it’s a stretch, and parents can never love all children equally, but they can try, and that’s what matters.
