We all have people in our lives who we place our trust in. Whether they be family members or close friends, it is important to have people in your life who you can trust. However, sometimes people can betray that trust.
One person took to Reddit to uncover some of the biggest betrayals that people have experienced in their lives by asking, “What was the biggest betrayal you’ve ever experienced in your life?”
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There were a lot of responses gathered from emotionally injured people across the internet, who discussed with honesty some of the most awful things that people had done to them.
A Mother’s Resentment
“My mother telling everyone I had slept with her husband, not my father, among other things. She omitted me from her obituary when she died. She turned her back to me over 30 years ago and never spoke to me again. Out of nowhere. She never liked me.” — pamelakachmar
This person went on to write that they have carried this pain with them for their entire life and that at 57 they are only now strong enough to tell people about the pain this caused them.
Ditching Friends
“I made a new friend (who seemed to really like me and was really nice and funny) since I felt like my other friends were slowly getting toxic. I was still friends with my old friends but I was trying to distance myself from them. Then an incident happened which basically meant I lost trust in my old friends and my new friend told me to ditch them. Since my new friend seemed so great and trustworthy, I did. This meant that pretty much my only friend was with me all the time. A week later, my new friend ditched me as well which left me with nobody.
“I later found out that my old friends were actually friends with the new friend and told the new friend to do this exact plan of me ditching the old friends and then the new friend ditching me. Great.” — trukio
Defending A Murderer
“My 2-year-old daughter was run over by my intoxicated stepmother and died. My father stopped all contact with me because she wasn’t allowed at the funeral.” — Firefly713
The stepmother was never charged, and this person said that the police claimed it was simply a horrible tragedy and they needed to let it go.
Childhood Memories
“When my parents were separated, my mother used her child alimony and support money to pay for a car and a bunch of electronics for her sketchy boyfriend at the time. He also took over my brother’s room.” — soulfulskeptic
In an updated comment, this person said that they now have a better relationship with their mother, although it is very complicated.
Sexual Assault
“I was raped when I was younger. My friend who was the only one who I told liked the dude who did it. So by the end of the day, everyone was in his side and the fucker threatened to press charges on me. It was a long time ago.” — truecrimejunky2018
This person has been in therapy since then to help overcome PTSD, and they still do work advocating for women in similar positions.
Let Down By A Close Friend
“He had been my closest friend for thirty years. I was godfather to his daughters. After his divorce from a domestic abuser (she served time for this), I spent lots of time and money helping him get back on his feet. It turns out he drank most of the money away and did little to work on his business. Instead, he spent lots of time in an expensive rebound relationship, developing a taste for fine wines and dining out.
“I moved in for a while to help with the kids. He was gone for days at a time, but not out working on his business. Before I “came to” to the reality he is a thief, a drunk, and a liar, I was out $15k and my Mom was out the $5k he used to avoid foreclosure. He never even thanked her. My love for the kids blinded me and made me the fool.” — GreenBaySnackers
This person wasn’t being a fool, just a good person. Hopefully, they realize that they did everything they could to help this person, but some people can’t be helped.
Stealing From Friends
“A while back when I was in College, one of my longtime friends was living with me. At the time, his parents paid his bills mostly and he worked occasionally. My friend (we will call him Joe) rarely went to class and eventually dropped out. No big deal if you don’t go to school but you should at least work. Joe ended up having a falling out with his parents and with his low amount of hours could afford to pay his portion of the rent or other bills. Again, no worries we were friends and I had a decent paying job at the time so I helped out…for awhile.
“The betrayal part came into play when he consistently didn’t pay for bills and eventually stole from me while I was at work. Keep in mind that he was still living with me at this time and I was basically supporting him while he sat home most days and did nothing. To date, he owes me well over $2000 and stole two Xbox one games, tools and other electronics totaling close to $500.” — 812Hoosier22
Dropping Off The Map
“Had a best friend for 20 years. We were there for major events in each others lives. I knew everything about each other.
“After she married her latest husband, she went no contact. Didn’t even have the decency to give me an explanation as to why. Didn’t tell me to fu*k off. Nothing.” — Ghost_of_Askreddit
A lot of people expressed a concern that this person’s friend may be in an abusive/manipulative relationship and urged the person who wrote this to reach out to them one last time.
Suggesting Suicide
“My father told me I should kill myself when I was 13. Gave me a knife for the job, too.” — imnotfunnybutitry
Hopefully, this person cut their toxic father out of their lives. No one should ever have to have such a horrific statement leveled at them.
Leaving Just After 18th Birthday
“Grew up in a very supportive and loving home. My dad unexpectedly decided to divorce my mom. He waited until one month after I turned 18, just to avoid child support. I haven’t spoken to him since, and that was 20 years ago.” — Hepcatoy
This person said that their father simply walked away suddenly and never looked back. They also explained that they left their father a note asking for him to get in touch again with their phone number and email, however, the father never reached out. They’re still waiting in hope.
Mother Stealing From Children
“My mother stole 4 years of college tuition my dad saved for me after calling my university posing as me to get my housing canceled. She then told him that I blew the money & left town. My dad used to beat me growing up & we hadn’t worked through our issues yet. He believed her & her theft wasn’t discovered until years later.
“Honestly, that’s not the worse she’s done but it was the moment I realized she never was or will be a mom to me.” — ExothermicReckoning
Thankfully, this person wrote an update explaining that their relationship with their father is now much better as their father owned up to what they did and they managed to move passed their troubles.
Disappearing During Illness
“Had chronic insomnia for 6 years where I frequently went 3-5 days straight with no sleep. My ‘friends’ were more concerned that I wasn’t going out to the bars with them than they were with the fact that I had a debilitating sleep disorder.
“One by one they stopped talking to me because I wasn’t around anymore. Sorry? I just went 3 days straight with no sleep while working 35 hours and attending school full-time. Come the weekend and I just want to melt into my bed, regardless if I’ll sleep or not.” — AlphaPotatoIQ
Discovering Someone’s True Nature
“I directed a play at my highschool last year. It was easily one of the hardest/best things I’ve ever done. It was an 8 person cast and I had to turn away many people but did cast one of my friends. We knew each other since middle school and that year started playing dnd with him.
“He is a smart person and a really good actor. As soon as I was put in charge of him he shifted. I quickly began to realize how sexist and cruel he could be. It hurt a lot. He shit talked the show to cast members and classmates. Told people he didn’t think it would be good. Argued explicit stage directions in the play endlessly. (And only chilled out once we asked one of the boys in the cast to speak with him.) He skipped most rehearsals. It frankly was bad. It was the first show I directed and I didn’t know any better and I didn’t know how to stop it or what to do about it.
“Out of everyone in the cast and crew (maybe 12 people tbh) I was hurt the most. I considered him a friend and a close one too. Now I know how manipulative he can be and how many of the things he told us when we were friends was probably very skewed.” — Jeli15
Fake Name
“I dated a man for 14 months. Then I found out he had given me a fake name. Then I found out he had a fiance. This happened a month ago, still fresh and it still stings.” — runthereszombies
I don’t understand what his endgame was with being in this relationship? I mean, it was obviously going to end in disaster, so why toy with someone like that?
Assaulted By A Partner
“I dated a man for four years and was so in love with him. We planned to get married. He was my everything. One night, he gave me an edible. Said he ensured it was safe and I believed him. He got me to drink excessively. I blacked out. Then he assaulted me.” — thisismycourage
This person wrote an updated comment explaining that they have spent years asking themself why he did it. Hopefully, this person has managed to move past this horrific event.
Uninvited
“When my father remarried, my brother and I weren’t invited to the wedding.” — soulfulskeptic
Sadly this person is still very distant from their father many years later.
Leaving At Christmas
“My SO left me after 18 years for a younger woman he met at work. It was 2 weeks before Christmas. Even if it’s been a couple of years it still hurts. It’s really hard to trust anyone.” — sonia72quebec
Suffering such a betrayal, particularly after such a long-term relationship, can leave you with severe trust issues. And, while it can be difficult to trust again, it is important to remember that not everyone is the same, and there are people out there worthy of your trust.
Betrayed By Best Friend And Girlfriend
“Senior year college, long time girlfriend and bestfriend hook up during my birthday party. I find out the next day. Things get really ugly, they end up dating and getting married. Years later she cheats on him and they get divorced. Dodged a bullet. I guess I should thank him?” — sodapopis
I wouldn’t go so far as to say you should thank him, but you sure as hell dodged a pretty big bullet there!
Having An Affair With His Wife’s Daughter
“Found out my 12 year SO had been cheating on me with my adult daughter for over two years. She had abandoned her newborn twins with me and I had been taking care of them by myself while I worked full-time. She [eventually] signed for me to be their guardian. Meanwhile my daughter was riding over the road with my SO. She got pregnant by him and kept that child. When I found out, I started packing up and was in the middle of moving when he came home unexpectedly and called the cops telling them I didn’t live there and was stealing his stuff.
“The woman I paid to babysit for me knew about all this and was keeping it from me and her husband. She called a cop friend of her husband’s and he threatened me with being arrested if I came back and got the rest of my stuff. My daughter suddenly decided she wanted her kids back and tried to run around the guardianship I had, but, THANK GOD CPS stepped in and prevented it. Come to find out the two of them had planned to sell the twins to the woman who was babysitting for me.
“I moved out on Oct 31st and by Christmas he had broken up with my daughter, kicked her out, the ex-babysitter left her husband and took off over the road with him and he had dumped her off and was sending me a message trying to get me back.” — victoriagarden1
Infidelity
“Husband slept with a waitress on our honeymoon.” — Jordan_mahon
This person discovered the betrayal on that very evening and left that evening. They were divorced within the week.
The Double Betrayal
“My birth mother walking out on me when i was eleven years old because she did not want to pay 87 dollars a month in child support. I let her back into my life when i was 21 only to have her do the exact same thing for another reason that she felt was a good reason when i was 24.” — Krylonstreamz
Letting someone back into your life after they’ve let you down is a tricky situation. There are some people who can change with time, and can seek to repair the bridges that they have burnt. However, there are also sadly a lot of people who never change.
Running Off With Family Member’s Girlfriend
“The time that my brother ran off with my GF to get married in Las Vegas Comes to mind. He was the big loser in the end.” — RonSwansonsOldMan
I always hate reading about instances where people have cheated with a family member’s partner. I can’t help but imagine a truly awkward Christmas dinner in absolute silence.
Missing A Promotion
“The director of education told me that I was in line for a promotion to the school superintendent. I felt pretty good about it because I believed I had the experience and skills to be a superintendent. Went through the interview process and I did not get the job. It was given to a junior member with fewer skills and experience.
“I was crushed and confused about not getting the job, particularly after the “support” from the director of education. I asked the director what happened and she told me that I ‘did not clearly articulate my leadership vision.’ OK, fine. Found out later that the director was f*cking the guy who got the superintendent job and that her husband left her as a result. So much for articulating your leadership vision!” — Potential-Initial
And people think that a profession in the education system doesn’t have its own share of internal politics!
Becoming Someone’s Best Friend For Manipulation
“In high school, I became good friends with a girl. Over the next year, she and I grew really close. I began getting feelings for her, and she confessed that she had them for me. However, she told me that she wasn’t sure if she was ready to date yet due to her still being upset over her breakup with her long term boyfriend which had happened nearly a year ago.
“School gets out for the summer, I suddenly get an email from her with some of the nastiest stuff I’ve ever read. It’s just full of all these really mean put-downs and her making fun of the insecurities I had told her about. I emailed her back, hurt and confused – the day before, we had been talking like normal. She never responded, and I went into that summer break wrecked.
“About a month and a half or so later, her best friend messages me and tells me what had happened: it turned out that, pretty much the whole time, she had been using me as a way to make her ex-boyfriend jealous to try to win him back. Once she thought she had leeway with him, she dropped me.” — SirNectarine
Calling Security On A Friend
“Complicated long story, but the only person I ever told I was raped by a family member, was a friend, mentor, and boss at my college. She said she loved me and would come give me a hug when I was having a bad day. To put it mildly, she had some boundary issues.
“Then she wanted nothing to do with me. I had minor anxiety one day and she called campus safety on me and I was never allowed to come back to work and she refused to ever speak to me again. I already had PTSD, but it is way worse now and multiple trauma specialists have said they don’t know how to help me.” — Loveteas
This person went on to say that their friend was also gaslighting them on behalf of the person in the story. Who knows what caused her emotional shift.
Betrayed By Their Pet!
“My biggest betrayal was when my dog took a massive sh*t on my bed right after I gave him his favorite dog treats!” — a_toe_infection
Thought this one could offer a bit of respite from the more haunting ones. Our pets are our best friends until they have gotten their treats, then we are nothing until they next need treats!
Sexual Harassment
“Started dating a guy. Told him I didn’t want to participate in sexual activities yet, cause I just wasn’t ready. He keeps pressuring me into uncomfortable situations that leads to an entire night of him sexually harassing me. I started to avoid him, trying to figure out how to break up with him. My friend who he was close with comes forward and tells me that he had plans to go see his ex-girlfriend since he couldn’t get sex from me.
“Later that day, I was with a group of three friends trying to figure out how to confront him. My bf messages me asking me what I’m doing. When I tell him I’m hanging out with friends he accuses me of lying. We get into an argument in which I confront him about sexually harassing me […] I told him I knew about him cheating on me, and I blocked him because I was sick of how he was twisting the truth and acting like a victim.
“A week later, several of my good friends have blocked me on social media. They refuse to talk to me and are calling me a cheater and scum and untrustworthy. Everyone in the friend group believes I was cheating on my ex” — rebeltwist
“My Ex-Best Friend Of Nearly 12 Years Betrayed Me.”
“I had just gotten married a few months prior to the incident. My husband had lost his job right before our wedding but found employment after searching. We attended church together, and one night my husband was working so I had to go to church by myself. I walk in best friend didn’t see me, but she was gossiping about how stupid my husband was, how he couldn’t provide an income, how I was taking advantage of her, etc. I immediately walked out feeling absolutely horrible.
“I sent her a message a few days later pretty much asking if it was true, she replied with yes adding a few more things to it. Like how I was a faker, I used her over the past 12 years, I was stupid for marrying him. She also had the nerve to blame me for my miscarriage. She was actively telling people what a horrible person I was.” — coffeeandjesus1986
And, to be gossiping in this way in a church as well, that’s not very Christian!
Credit Card Fraud
“Parent opened up credit cards in my name. Ended up having to report them for fraud.” — A_Dry_Californian
This person ultimately got their credit score fixed and their parents had to pay the money back like a loan. They also said that there are still trust issues between them and their parents as a result of it.
Abandonment During Sickness
“So when I was 12 yo my mom got pretty sick. We didn’t know what it is and eventually went to the hospital. Turns out she had terminal cancer and would die in some months. Me my brother and my 2 sisters stood with her but my dad didn’t, he just disappeared like a smoke bomb ninja just cause my mom had cancer. She died 2 months later after my dad had left us.” — ALilSadPotato
You’d have to be some level of cruel to abandon your children and your wife at a time as difficult as this.
Introduction To Their New Family
“The main one that comes to mind will always be with my father introducing me to his new family.
“My father took me to our housekeeper’s house and kissed her and took her, her kids, and I to an amusement park. That was his way of telling me that he was separating from my mom. I only found out that she and her kids were moving into the house when the youngest child (around my age; 12) asked me how I felt about them moving in.
“The worst part was my mom having to find out all of this from me because my father never told her that he was through with their relationship.” — Additional-Seat
That is a lot to put on a child without warning, and for their mother to have to find out from their kid is just cowardly on the father’s behalf.
Cheating As Punishment
“My ex girlfriend ditched me in a city neither of us live in to go f*ck some dude she knew to punish me for being too nice to a girl I had gone on couple dates with (that clearly went nowhere) when we happened to cross paths on the street.
“It was my birthday and we were on the way to link up with friends and family so they could meet my new girlfriend. Real fun explaining to them all where my girlfriend went.” — polkemans
I wouldn’t have bothered meeting up with her ever again after that!
Mocking A Friend Behind Their Back
“When I was in 5th grade, a girl (let’s call her C) had transferred and I was chosen to show her around and befriend her. We always played at recess, we’re partners, etc. C and I had drifted apart until about September of this year. We started Snapchatting. C was talking about how good of a person I am and that I don’t deserve the hate I get. (Context: I’ve been bullied a LOT.) She also said that if I ever needed someone to talk to, she’d be there for me. It meant a lot to me at the time.
“Now, I have anxiety. I get panic attacks that happen frequently in school (and C KNOWS this.) C had posted on her private story. She was making fun of me. About faking my panic attacks. It hurt me, it really did. When I confronted her, she said never to contact her until further notice and that she wouldn’t surround herself with me, my boyfriend, or friends.” — thatonekeller
This betrayal has sadly given the person who wrote this trust issues to this day. It is shocking how cruel young people can be to each other at times.
Spying On Children
“Growing up (ages 8 through 18) I found video cameras hidden in my room in obscure places by my mom. She would also often read my diary and go through my trash. I would find papers I had written or drawings I made and thrown away hidden in her dresser drawers under clothes (as a kid I would often borrow her clothes to wear if my laundry was dirty).” — Throwaway4511984
The notion that someone could be watching you is a fear that a lot of people develop. I can’t imagine how much something like this would make you distrust your surroundings at all times.
Faking Being In Love
“I’m gay, (bragging intensifies), and I’d recently broken up with my S/O. I later found out that they weren’t in love with me, but rather just wanted to use me to say ‘I am bisexual’, or ‘was gay at one point.’ I was pretty heartbroken, and I no longer date, but rather just dream about an actual relationship…”
Lying about being in love with someone, especially for such shallow purposes, is just downright evil.
Threatening To Take Their Spouse’s Children Away
“So, my stepfather was an abusive alcoholic who used to touch me inappropriately and say suggestive things, and I moved out at 16 because he tried to rape me. Fast forward many years, and I was married to my kids’ dad. We were having marital problems, and he was becoming abusive, and he actually told me that he would tell the divorce judge that, because of what happened to me as a child, I was crazy and that I would be promiscuous and allow other men to touch our children.
“I have been separated from him since 2013. Now that my son is 18 and daughter is 20, and he no longer has custody or visitation issues to hold over my head, I am going to save for a divorce. He’s never paid a penny of child support, and it’s been tough, but I’ve made it, so screw him and his nasty thoughts.” — BigRedKetoGirl
The faster that divorce comes through and this person is away from her toxic husband’s manipulation the better!
Incorrectly Suspecting Partner Of Infidelity
“Time for my moment of shame. I was the one who did the betrayal. I began to suspect that my son wasn’t mine, so I blatantly accused my ex-wife of infidelity and forcing her to agree to and pay for a paternity test. She was telling the truth, she never touched anyone else, and my son is mine. After all, the results came in and I realized the truth, she kicked me out and filed for divorce.
“She now has full custody, I’m only allowed to see him once a week, he wants nothing to do with me, and I’m a miserable, depressed mess. I destroyed my marriage and relationship with my son over nothing and I’ll never forgive myself for as long as I live.” — Arcadia9009
Stealing Someone’s Crush
“In college, I was super into this guy who I became pretty close to at one point. I also had another friend (unrelated) who I always told how much I liked the other guy. We all ended up having a class together so they met. I’m very shy and the friend was very outgoing, so she said she’d try to hook me and the guy I liked up. For months I vented to her about everything I felt, and she continued to tell me that she was gonna help me see how he feels and giving me advice on what to do. After that semester ended I started hearing rumors about the two of them and denied them greatly because they both told me otherwise, and more importantly because these were my friends, and I trusted them.
“I defended them for months. But I was wrong. They lied to me and were together for god knows how long. I never got any clarity or closure. Both of them knew my feelings the whole time. Needless to say, I ended up getting ghosted by my two ‘best college friends’.” — xanente
Pressuring For An Abortion
“I learned that I was pregnant with my third child and was so excited to break the news to my then-husband. He ripped up the sonogram and said, ‘you’re going to get rid of it’ while jabbing his finger in my chest. We had a huge fight and he walked out. The divorce was finalized literally just hours before I went into labor with our daughter.
“I still have no idea why he suddenly turned on us like that. One minute, he was a loving, caring husband and father, and the next, he completely shut down and acted like we were nothing. It was like a switch flipped inside him. I went from having a happy life to being a struggling single mom practically overnight.” — OkRemote5
There is no way to imagine how this person must be feeling in the wake of such a sudden shift in their life. However, there is always a chance they will meet someone who will love both them and their daughter in the future.
What Happens In Thailand Doesn’t Stay In Thailand
“Ex-husband deployed to Thailand. I had saved up money to take my three small children back home to see family. He had just recovered from a near-death experience and I had just had major neurosurgery and our youngest child was only three months old. I loved my family and thought my husband was a saint. While on my trip to Texas to see family, I am buying diapers and my card gets declined. A friend pays for my diapers and I immediately check my bank and am overdrawn. I contact the red cross to have my husband call me.
“He tells me that the Army has made a mistake on his paycheck and he will try to fix it. It did not become fixed. I had to borrow money from relatives to get back home with my children and feed them till the next payday. A couple of weeks later, husband comes home and we are scheduled to attend this big formal ball. During the festivities, one of his friends alludes to him having three girls at once. When I question him he panics and explains that when he was in Thailand he spent all the money I had saved on prostitutes and now he was afraid he had an STD and that I would need to be checked. I remember being thankful for my friends because I didn’t get out of bed for about three days. Total and complete devastation.” — Heyjo76
Sadly, this person went on to get married again to someone who abused them physically. They are now single again and much happier.
