Everyone has something that they’ve kept from their parents at some point or another — and if you haven’t, then congrats on being just the most painfully wonderful person ever. However, someone posed the question, “What is the biggest secret you’ve kept from your parents?” and received a plethora of responses.
It should be highlighted that the person posing the question asked for serious responses. So, while there may be some funny ones, a lot of the responses that people gave from anonymous accounts contain quite serious subject matter.
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The Real Reason Their Laptop Broke
“I actually DID know why my laptop wasn’t working. I spilled a fair bit of Jack Daniel’s on it.” – dramaticeffect_
I’d love to know what reason they really gave, and how they answered the question, “Why does it stink of whiskey?”
Being Arrested
“My mum doesn’t know I’ve been arrested twice, one time with my dad”
Now there is a story behind here that I need to know. Fair play though for managing to hide this from your mother. My mom would be onto us immediately thanks to all those detective novels she reads.
The Classic
“That I used to sneak out of the house from our second story bathroom window to go nightclubbing with my friends after my parents went to bed.” – Vyzantinist
Okay, I think the amount of people who were guilty of this must be staggering. You’re not alone.
The Fake Girlfriend
“I just pay escorts to show as my ‘girlfriend’ so they would stop telling their friends to hook me up with their daughters. Every gathering they would show up meet everyone and always have to leave early.” – joblagz2
Discrete Suspension
“My dad doesn’t know that I was suspended due to grades for a semester in college.” – _ohhello
I personally never understood suspending someone from school, for this reason, clearly they need more help, not less.
Discrete Pizza Parties
“Okay, this is pretty tame compared to these other comments… I sometimes grab lunch or dinner on the way home from class, and I don’t tell them. If I did, I’d probably get yelled at for ‘wasting money when we have perfectly good food at home.’ My mom’s cooking is great but…sometimes I just want to grab some pizza.” – Kent_Knifen
While on the surface this may seem “tame”, having time to ourselves to do something just for us is nothing to be ashamed of, and, heck, pizza is great so you do you!
Stealing Pokemon Cards
“When I was at Walmart with my mom, and I stole 2 of those big cartons full of Pokemon Cards. took the cards and stuffed them in my back pocket. I planned the whole robbery a week before. I was the best robber at 9” – j-benz
I found a loaf of Pokemon cards when cleaning an old room out the other day and decided I may as well sell them for a little extra cash. Instead, I spent about three hours looking through them and kept them all.
The Computer History
“When I was around 14 I overheard my parents arguing. My mom was yelling at my dad about some porn searches on the computer. It was really me that was going on the computer in their room and watching porn. He kept denying it and she kept calling him a liar. He slept in the guest bedroom for a month after that fight.” – postedUpOnTheBlock
Wow, either your Dad was doing an amazing cover job there, or he was probably watching something a little risky as well.
Sexual Orientation
“That I’m a lesbian. And that that “friend” who I don’t invite home anymore is actually my ex…”
Thankfully the world is becoming a slightly more tolerant place; however, there are still a lot of people out there whose families do not accept the LGBTQ+ community.
Money Problems
“I make more money than I let on. My parents have and will always be the “I take care of you all your life, time for you to pay it back” type of parent. Except there is no end to this “debt.” So I hide money from them so they can’t take advantage of me” — Nagaisbae
This is a really tricky situation, and very unfair on the person who wrote this. The fact they feel that this is necessary is heartbreaking.
Drug Use
“I snorted my Ritalin prescription for 7 years before I finally started taking it normally again. I was in so deep and they never even knew”
Nowadays there are plenty of websites, forums, and support meetings for people struggling with drug addiction which can be located online, or through a counselor.
Late Night TV
“I used to watch Southpark when they thought I was sleeping” – [deleted]
I think the first thing I watched that my parents probably wouldn’t have been happy about was Alien . I was scared witless, but it’s still one of my favorite films.
DNA Tests
“I met the guy my mom told me was my real father. We did a DNA test and there is a 0% chance. He even took me on a white water rafting trip with his wife and son. I’ve never told her.” – the_nightcourt
For some people, sometimes it’s simply easier to accept and move past something.
Infidelity
“I know that my mom’s cheating on my dad. He doesn’t know it’s happening (to my knowledge) and she doesn’t know that I know.” – throwaway28386472828
People were quick to suggest that they tell their father; however, it must be a horrifically unpleasant situation for them to find themselves in.
Friends
“My mom always wondered why I didn’t have friends in high school and it is because we were broke and I knew she was struggling so I refused anytime people wanted to do things so I wouldn’t ask for money then in my last year of high school I worked full time so I had no time to make friends” – winenotbecauseofrum
Hopefully now, in later life, they have more time to spend with friends and family.
Mental Illness
“That I’m diagnosed bipolar.” – bllaaushpibu
Being diagnosed with mental illness can make you feel isolated, but you aren’t.
Even if you feel like you cannot talk to your parents, talk to your friends or other relatives. People will often be more supportive than you think in your head.
Not Another Teen Secret
“When I was 17 I rented Not Another Teen Movie watched it and returned it without them finding out. They wouldn’t have approved.” – somemetausername
I can safely say I have never seen it; however, I googled it to see what it was. All I could think of was there are so many better movies to rent at that age that your parents probably wouldn’t have approved of. Trainspotting for instance.
Parent’s Drug Use
“I found my dad’s cocaine. I feel like I don’t know him anymore. I never want him to know I found it. I’m still a minor and still live with them.” – rhinoceroblue
Recording Over Important Home Videos
“I recorded Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz over my sister’s high school graduation video. It’s been about 18 years, but I still feel bad.” — sheldonowns
Wow, I can imagine that was a harsh moment of realization! This sort of thing is a problem that today’s generation will never understand.
Siblings Secrets
“That my sister is gay. She openly admits it to everyone, except for my family. She opened up to me, eventually but both my parents and older brother don’t know about it. Since then we’ve become a lot closer than when we were kids.” – vkuma
While we may argue with our siblings as kids, they can really become our closest family in later life and offer much-needed support.
Career Choices
“They had no idea I left my job with the cable company to sell cars / write up oil changes for almost a year. I was emotionally burnt out from the bullshit and couldn’t take it anymore so I tried switching careers. Didn’t really pan out, but it did get me away from that toxic shithole of a company.” – Lyn1987
A job should never make you feel like that. The idea that no one likes their job is a myth. There is something out there for everyone, you just need to look for it.
There’s A Baby On The Way!
“I’m pregnant. Right now. I plan on telling them really soon. Just waiting until the time is right. They’re gonna be so excited.” – pinkcamo37
This one is a lot more positive than the rest, and I’m sure that they’ll be over the moon!
Religious Beliefs
“I’m not a Christian. They don’t know, and I don’t know how to tell them I’ve chosen hell over blind faith.” – claraboldlygoes
A person’s faith if they chose to have one should be their choice, not forced upon them by family or circumstance.
Getting Clean
“I told them that I was doing an extra on-site learning course for uni in which I would be away for 31 days interstate. My husband sorted out the kids so he was fine. I actually went to a residential rehab and got clean and sober. Didn’t tell them until I was released. They literally had no idea.” – millypilly83
Well done for seeking help and seeing it through. There is nothing to be ashamed of in receiving help.
Petty Theft
“I Stole money for weed and regret it to this day,” this person writes, “My lazy a** should’ve just gotten a job instead.”
We’ve all done things that we regret, and dwelling on those things can have a tremendous negative impact on our lives.
Dark Thoughts
“That I constantly fantasized about murdering my verbally and physically abusive stepfather,” this person reveals, “Of course, I never did. Thankfully, he and my mom separated less than a year after that incident. My depression was minimized tremendously after that.”
Food For Thought
“I have an eating disorder,” this person writes, “I’ve had one since I was 11, and I even went to the hospital for it. They still don’t know.”
The Bottom Line
“That I don’t love them,” this person reveals, “I care about them in the way I care for a hurt stranger but I won’t be crying when they die except for over the stress of handling the funeral and finding a place for their kid and animals to live.”
Assault
“Being sexually abused by my cousins. Which my mom would leave me at their house to go to the casino a lot as a kid” – Sad_Mars22
Go Hard Or Go Home
“The fact that I work out, hard and heavy,” this person writes, “My Mom thinks that muscles on girls are gross, and for the years that she knew I worked out she treated me like I’m gross too. It was heartbreaking for me. So now I pretend that I lost interest in lifting weights and I’m much happier this way.”
Til Death Do Us Part
“I lived with my girlfriend/fiancé for 1.5 years in a house, 45 minutes from where my parents lived prior to us being married,” this person shares, “They are very conservative and would have likely not attended the wedding had they known.”
No Tears Left To Cry
“How much I cry,” this person writes, “They have too much to deal with and I’ve learned to handle it on my own and get back to my normal smiley self.”
Emotional Motion Sickness
“That I got a mental health screening three months ago and found out I’d been suffering from depression,” this person reveals, “For the past 7 years.”
Cut Off
“That I genuinely have no desire to have a relationship with them,” this person shares, “If it wasn’t for the wife planning dinners with my mother I would have no relationship at all. Father left in my teenage years and is a pathological liar, so I’m better off without him too.”
Amateur Author
“I’ve read or written fanfiction since I was 16 years old,” this person writes, “I have no idea what they thought I was laughing at on my laptop for the last ten years but I’m glad they didn’t know the truth. Some of it is preeeeetty explicit.”
Late Night Calls
“I was a phone sex operator in University,” this woman reveals, “I told everyone I took phone orders for The Bay (department store in Canada). One day my dad asked me if they were hiring. Nope. We were not.”
Being Falsely Accused Of A Crime
“I was accused of rape when I was 17 (legally an adult in Texas so they didn’t have to tell them) and a detective took my phone for the school day to verify the texts proving the encounter was consensual were real. Really weird time in my life, having to deal with the fallout at school and not telling them the truth.” – bow2lepermessiah
Pregnancy
“I got someone pregnant and I’m pretty sure she kept the baby and didn’t tell me.” – LonelyPauper
Imagine not being sure about the latter part. It’s amazing the things that we can keep from our closest family.
