Kids can get up to all manner of shenanigans, whether they’re eating things they shouldn’t be, or doing one of the myriad other things that they shouldn’t be… look, there’s a lot of things that kids shouldn’t be doing okay!
However, more often than not, kids of all ages get caught doing things that they definitely don’t want their parents seeing. One person took to Quora to find out what some of the most alarming things are that parents have caught their kids doing, by asking: “What is one thing you caught your child doing that you wish you had never seen?”
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So, here are some of the most shocking stories that parents had to tell, some of which had these parents wishing they could bleach out their eyes or worse!
Torturing Barbie Dolls
“I came home from work one day to a horrendous smell. Following my nose to the kids’ bathroom, I saw my daughter, then maybe 9, with a Barbie doll. Barbie was naked, and her hair had been chopped off. My daughter was holding Barbie by her little neck over the sink, and had a lighter at Barbie’s foot.
“‘Talk,’ my daughter screamed, as Barbie’s foot melted into the sink. ‘I told you to talk!’
“‘What are you doing with Barbie?’ I asked her, trying to keep my voice calm. My little daughter’s eyes hardened and she nearly snarled ‘She won’t give up enemy secrets, so I have to torture her!’ This was out of character for my daughter, and we were not a household that condoned torture, under any circumstances, so that really took me by surprise.” — Eleanor Lang
It’s refreshing to know that you are not a household that condones torture! Well done you! Also, I kind of want to know what secrets that doll held!
Exhibitionism
“I walked in on my teenaged daughter giving her boyfriend a blowjob. In the living room, while our house was being packed by a team of movers. The boyfriend actually saw me looking at them and must have seen the shock on my face. I just walked right past and went upstairs, where I had been heading. But I could only stay there so long.
“When I finally got up the courage to go back downstairs, they were, much to my disgust, still engaged! I finally found some words to tell them to cut it out and find someplace private. My issue was not that she was sexually active. It was the exhibitionism of it and the boyfriend’s complete disregard for my embarrassment.”
The parent claimed that she asked her daughter how she would feel if she had walked in on her mother and father doing the same thing, to which she nearly “threw up”.
Stealing
“I have two stepsons who are now in their late thirties. They came to live with me and their Father in their early teens as did their younger sister. We had a house with a hallway down the middle and the master bedroom at one end of it and the back door at the other.
“One day my stepdaughter was out in the yard calling me from the kitchen and I stood at the back door looking out. Something made me turn around and I saw one of my stepsons in the hallway a few steps from me and the other one in the bedroom taking money out of my purse in the bedroom. The one in the hallway was obviously meant to be a lookout as he turned to call out to his brother in the bedroom but alas for them it was too late.”
Apparently the stealing happened on more than one occasion. However, she now says that they are perfectly normal, law-abiding, pleasant people in their 30s.
The Glue Fiasco
“Once when my son was only 3 and my daughter was 1 I was watching a movie and hadn’t noticed my son wandering off to his grandparent’s room.
“My son had gotten into his grandfather’s dresser and found some super glue. For reason’s I still to this day haven’t figured out, he had stripped his clothes off, and while super gluing together random objects (his grandfather’s glasses were glued to a plate) some of the glue had dripped into his lap. When I walked in, he was freaking out, desperately trying to remove his penis and scrotum from his leg where they were stuck. Within a couple of minutes, his grandparents had arrived home, and with them my brother in law, and we had a full house of people to witness this brief lapse in parental oversight.” — Eric Wilson
Kids playing with glue can only end in disaster! It’s a miracle schools still let them near it!
Defecating In Boxes
“This isn’t my experience as a mother, but as an older sister […] When my brother was around ten (I was then 13), he had an issue with sleep walking. Almost every night he would wander the hall looking for the bathroom, and usually, I would hear him and help him do his thing so my parents didn’t have to get up. But this particular night I was exhausted; I had spent the entire day going through the house and collecting all of my childhood books I wanted to keep for my own future children. I had collected them all into a plastic box that I had left in the hallway.
“I was pretty deeply asleep when I heard it. Something that sounded like water running. I dragged myself out of bed and opened the door to a sight that still makes me sad- my brother, sound asleep, peeing into the collection of my favorite books.” — Emma Will
I doubt this person will be giving a box full of books soaked in urine to future generations.
The “Secret” Drawer
“I had worked a long twelve-hour night shift. I came home and decompressed in the living room for a little bit. When I walked into my bedroom my six-year-old daughter was laying in the bed legs crossed fully dressed. I could hear my wife was taking a shower. I was getting my clothes together to go to bed. I kept hearing a buzzing noise.
“I was sleep-deprived and it took a minute to focus on the noise. We had a hidden jewelry drawer in our headboard. Like all bad secrets, my daughter knew about it. She had opened it to find my wife’s hard white plastic little vibrator. She was running it across her teeth” — Bob Nicholas
Apparently this person and his wife still laugh about this to this day!
Eating Stuff They Shouldn’t Be Eating
“My second son, now 21 was a handful as a child. As soon as he woke up, he’d start crying and wanting to get out of the cot. His older brother (2 years older) would be in his proper bed and they’d wake up together, shared bedroom […]
“I went into their bedroom in the morning as it was waking up time. Saw older son sat on bed, reading a book. Thought that’s odd, young son is quiet. Turned to look at young son. See brown all over his face and around his mouth. Think to myself, how did he get chocolate? […] I then see young son go into nappy grab a handful of poo and shove it into his mouth, grinning all the time! I both laughed and gagged at the same time.” — Dicky Hopkins
Good Lord, I’m gagging just thinking about this! How people could handle this sort of situation I will never know.
Plagiarism
“The thing that my child is doing that I wish I had never seen? My talented daughter is stealing ideas from another artist. This sort of thing can ruin her professional career before she even has a chance to start it, not to mention the financial and legal ramifications plagiarism can bring. What is really heartbreaking, though, is that she truly has talent. This all boils down to absolute laziness. Rather than developing her own ideas, she finds something she likes, emulates it, and claims it as her own. Simple laziness. Laziness that can have some extreme consequences.” — Dan Harvell
This person had to post an update due to the amount of people saying he was being harsh on his daughter. He explained that his daughter was beginning to make contacts in the art world, and he didn’t want her to mess up her opportunities.
Birthday Surprise!
“I came home early from work for my son’s 15th birthday. Bringing home a Speed Racer cake as a flash back to his childhood.
“I heard noises coming from his bedroom. So I opened the door to surprise him and found him naked and his girlfriend half-naked about to get busy. It was not the birthday surprise I was expecting to give him.” — Sharon Secord
I think I’m actually more shocked at the fact that anyone liked Speed Racer!
Suffocating Their Sibling
“I was in the kitchen of our small 2 bedroom apartment when all grew quiet. That is unusual when you have a 20 month-old daughter who is a monkey type climber, and a 4 month-old baby boy. So I went to their bedroom to investigate.
To my horror, I saw the 20-month old girl inside my infant son’s crib. She was sitting on her own regular-sized bed pillow which she had placed on top of the infant, from under which only one little frantically kicking foot was to be seen. She had a very guilty look on her face. I pushed her aside, picked up the pillow, and there lay my tiny baby gasping for breath. My first reaction was relief that he was alive. My second reaction was horror that the beautiful little toddler with the big innocent eyes was capable of murder.” — Liz Marsh
It is more than likely that the child didn’t know what she was doing; however, it must still have been a very terrifying experience, and the mother is lucky she caught them in time.
Disrespecting Nature
“My husband and I went out west with our 3–4 year old son. We were at some kind of park on a nature trail. As we’re walking we see a large group of people hunched over looking at something on the ground. It was some kind of bug, and it must have been rare or something because these people were amazed by it.
“As we get to the group they were leaving so we stooped over to look at this amazing creature too. Knowing nothing about bugs we just kind of took a quick look and started walking away. My son stayed a minute longer looking at this creature and as I turn around to tell him to come on, I see him take his little foot and stomp on it.” — T Blancke
According to their parents, this child is now very mindful of nature! Which is good!
Threatening Murder
“When I was 15, my nephew (my older sister’s son), was 5 years old. They lived 2 minutes away from us. He loved me; he could never get enough of hanging out with me and my younger brother, who was 12 at the time. We would have countless sleepovers […]
“One time, they visited us on a Friday. He asked my mom (his grandma) if my brother and I could go sleepover at his house, and come back Saturday My mom, for some reason or another, said ‘No, not this week. Maybe next week.’ He pouted and went to another room, visibly upset.
“I went up to him and asked him what was wrong. ‘I want you guys to sleepover,’ he said, pouting. ‘I know, but my mom said no,’ I replied. Then he said something terrifying: ‘Okay. Let’s kill your mom.'” — Kevin Singh
I’d be slowly backing away from that kid, right out of the room, and still backing away to this day.
Eating Worms
“He’s not my kid, but I have always been more of a mother to him than a sister. He’s been mostly a good kid.
“The worst thing I have seen him do is eat mud. Mud which had earthworms in it. And he was eating earthworms too. Yup, his tiny mouth was filled with mud and there were worms dangling from his mouth. He had such a gleeful glint in his eyes.” — Saumya Sharma
Everyone knew that one kid in primary school who would eat worms didn’t they?
Fixing Their Glasses
“I saw my older son repair his glasses with tape.
“I was mortified! He never complains, he doesn’t ask for much but I’d been so inattentive that I missed the fact he’d broken his glasses. This was a moment of failure for me as a parent.” — Tom Martin
I wouldn’t say this marks you as a failure as a parent. They might have only just broken them?
Weeing In Public
“We were at a carnival waiting in line for a funnel cake. My son at the time was about 3. I looked over to ask him if he wanted one and he was standing there peeing in line. It was by far the most embarrassing thing he’s done.” — Morgan Strebler
He must have really needed to go! Either that or he was far too excited at the prospect of funnel cake.
*Crunching Sounds*
“Both of these were stories my mom told about my siblings. I think the memories of my own children’s horrors are still mostly repressed.
“When my brother was a toddler playing outside in the garden, my mom came outside to find him with one of those big green tomato worms in his hand. Half of one. Munching and smacking his lips.” — Wayne Henderson
This kid must have watched the Lion King one too many times. Also, what won’t kids eat? There are so many tales of kids eating disgusting stuff it’s putting me off my tea.
Taking A “Nap”
“A few years ago I was dating this guy who was quite older than me. I was 21 and he was in his 40s. He had a son who was 13 at the time. We all rented a condo on the beach for the summer. Well, one day my bf went out to grab dinner and me and his son were left alone. The boy said he was going to take a “nap” which I thought was weird because it was later at night. When his father came home with dinner I went up to his room to tell him to come and eat. I caught him masturbating to my pictures of me in my bikini on the beach. I have literally never been more mortified in my life” — Amanda Benoit
Yeah, I can’t imagine that that relationship lasted very long.
Digging Up Pets
“Many years ago, when our three children were still young, our cat had kittens and produced a runt as well. The poor thing was in a state and the following day it died.
“The children were understandably distraught, and to try for a little closure, we gave the little one a respectful funeral in the garden. That went well I thought, until the next day I caught the youngest digging up the corpse.” — Gwyn Kemp-Philp
This wasn’t as creepy as it sounds. It turned out that the child thought it had been naughty and was just being punished, so was only trying to help it.
Animal Abuse
“I caught my two little kids being boosted up over the locked pool area fence by the two apartment complex bullies […] I screamed, ‘YOU KIDS GET DOWN FROM THERE RIGHT NOW AND COME INSIDE! TIME OUT, BOTH OF YOU!’ I was frantic and my heart was beating out of my chest with fright. They both burst into tears and came running into the house where they sat in their quiet corners for twenty long minutes. The bullies ran off laughing […]
“The next day I noticed the same neighborhood bullies out in the grass Commons tossing a football back and forth […] They smiled sweetly and yelled, ‘Hi, Wendi!’ I turned and waved at them amazed that these two little hoodlums were behaving themselves. It was then that I noticed the ‘football’ they were playing catch with was actually a tiny kitten.
“I yelled at the boys who grew scared and ran off with the kitten into their apartment. I banged on their door. Their disheveled mother answered the door with a baby on her hip. I told her what her naughty sons were doing to the poor kitten. She slammed the door in my face.” — Wendi Tibbets
“We still don’t know what happened to his clothes.”
“This wasn’t my child, but my youngest brother […] We lived on the south side of Chicago at the time, and my father taught at IIT. My mother was with me and my middle brother at the Student Union, my father was at home in our campus housing apartment. Chicago is a big, loud city, and the campus was equidistant between two fire stations, so sirens were the norm.
“That day, as my mother recounted it, there were even more than normal, and a traffic jam on Wabash Avenue in front of the building– a wreck, she supposed. At least until she was greeted by a very large campus police sergeant, who had my baby brother in tow. Naked. Apparently he had just been ‘arrested’, happily by campus cops who knew us and not by the CPD, for riding his tricycle down the center of Wabash Ave., stark naked.” — Francis C. Zanger,
