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Mom On TikTok Who Calls Cribs ‘Tiny Jail Cells’ Says She Will ‘Never Enforce A Bedtime’

by Lex Gabrielle
4 years ago
in People & Society
Reading Time: 4 mins read
A A
TikTok l @comingupfern

TikTok l @comingupfern

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Many things about raising children are pretty universal, while other things are not. Some parents prefer to breastfeed while others prefer formula. Some parents like to have babies in daycare, while others decide to stay home with their little ones.

Some parents disagree on sleeping arrangements for their kids, too.

Image credit: Unsplash | Sidekix Media
Unsplash | Sidekix Media

Some parents prefer bassinets and baskets for their babies, while others put their newborns in cribs. Some even prefer co-sleeping above all.

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Many parents do agree that babies need a certain amount of sleep every night.

Image credit: Unsplash | Peter Oslanec
Unsplash | Peter Oslanec

Studies indicate that babies should get between 12-15 hours of sleep every day/night, with many taking naps throughout the day.

That’s why some parents opt for sleep schedules.

Image credit: Unsplash | Isaac Quesada
Unsplash | Isaac Quesada

Many parents decide to have sleep schedules where they feed and nap at specific times, to ensure their baby is getting enough rest.

Many parents seem to disagree when it comes to where their baby sleeps, however.

Image credit: Unsplash
Unsplash

There is a great debate in parenting when it comes to where babies sleep — in their own room in their own crib, or moving the crib to the parents’ room.

There are tons of parents who believe having babies sleep in their own crib and room is best.

Image credit: Unsplash | Courtney Kammers
Unsplash | Courtney Kammers

Experts recommend that parents room-share with their baby for the first six months or year. But, parents often want their babies to learn to sleep on their own and be comfortable in their own space, adjusting outside of the womb.

However, not all parents abide by this.

Image credit: Unsplash | Tara Raye
Unsplash | Tara Raye

Mom Alice Bender of Arizona shared a video on TikTok discussing her beliefs on how she believes children should “sleep” and why she forgoes the usual methods.

Bender says that “babies should not be forced to go to bed.”

Image credit: TikTok l @comingupfern
TikTok l @comingupfern

‘I don’t have a crib because I will never enforce my baby to have a bedtime,’ she said in a TikTok video.

Bender believes that babies should have the same bodily autonomy as adults.

Image credit: TikTok l @comingupfern
TikTok l @comingupfern

“Babies are people too, and forcing anyone to sleep when they’re not tired is inhumane,” she continued.

The mom also disagrees with parents who put their babies in cribs.

Image credit: TikTok l @comingupfern
TikTok l @comingupfern

Bender said that cribs are like “tiny jail cells” for babies, explaining that her baby sleeps in an open bed without railings. She also said they use a floor bed, so that her baby can move around safely if she doesn’t feel like sleeping.

The mom said many parents treat their babies like prisoners.

Image credit: TikTok l @comingupfern
TikTok l @comingupfern

She claimed that many parents use cribs because they allow parents to walk away and ignore the baby. Bender believes most nursery designs and products benefit the parents more than the babies.

Additionally, Bender says she promotes co-sleeping.

The mom says she’s following “attachment parenting,” meaning she never spends more than two hours away from her baby, as well.

Attachment parenting is something that is widely used by many parents.

Image credit: Unsplash | Zach Lucero
Unsplash | Zach Lucero

Parents respond sensitively to children and create and develop a deep and natural bond with their child. Many parents who follow attachment parenting breastfeed for longer periods of time and spend hours on end with their child, like Bender does.

Many who follow attachment parenting also follow co-sleeping.

Image credit: Unsplash | kevin liang
Unsplash | kevin liang

While co-sleeping can mean simply sharing a room with your baby, it can also mean safely bed-sharing for some parents.

If you plan on bed-sharing, be sure to consult an expert first as most recommend placing infants in their own bed to avoid serious injuries or death.

Bender shared with TikTok users that she does co-sleep with her baby.

Image credit: Unsplash | Isaac Del Toro
Unsplash | Isaac Del Toro

While she does not do so every night, she does promote co-sleeping for parents while discussing her views on parenting and sleep routines.

Bender’s controversial stance struck a chord with the parenting community online.

Image credit: Unsplash | Ashley Walker
Unsplash | Ashley Walker

Many comments have criticized her opinions, saying that kids need structure and routine.

Additionally, many pointed out that cribs and bassinets are recommended by experts to ensure that babies are safe while they are sleeping. The American Academy of Pediatrics advises against bed-sharing as it can lead to infant injury or death.

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