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“I Got Back at My Bullying Coworker – But Now I’m Worried I Went Too Far”

by Lex Gabrielle
8 months ago
in People & Society
Reading Time: 6 mins read
A A
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Share on FacebookShare on TwitterPin This Post

Being bullied can be a very traumatic experience. For many people, it begins in childhood, when someone pokes fun at them for something that they oftentimes cannot control. When you’re bullied as a child, the feelings that come along with it can stay with you for years to come — far into adulthood.

That is why many people who are bullied as adults find it very challenging to cope — it brings up unresolved feelings from their youth that they haven’t quite dealt with. However, when they’re older, they know that they can fight back more so than when they were kids.

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When we feel we’re being picked on, there are many ways we try to “fight back”

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As children, we may have cried or hid our true feelings. But, as adults, we can retaliate and speak up for ourselves especially if we were the type of child who never really stood up for ourselves in the past — it forces us to make a change and have a backbone.

There is a fine line for standing up for yourself, though

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Many people who are being bullied want to prove a point and put their bullies in their place. However, it can be a gray area on how to do so. The bullied don’t always want to become the bully — they just want to make sure that everyone knows they can’t treat them badly.

However, do two wrongs make a right?

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A moral question always comes into play when people want to stand up to their bullies. Are they just as wrong as their bully if they do so? Is it going too far when they want to prove their point?

Sometimes, it can be even worse

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When someone finally gets the ammunition to speak up for themselves, they can take things a bit too far. That newfound power and adrenaline can take things a little too far and in the end, they are left feeling even worse than before.

Recently, one woman opened up about this situation in her office.

man and woman sitting on table
Unsplash

The 35-year-old mom shared that her co-worker, Debbie, has been picking on her for a few months. Admittedly, she says she does have a “stockier build,” but she’s never felt badly about it.

However, Debbie made her feel bad

a woman standing in a field at sunset
Unsplash

For three months, Debbie has made comments about her weight, she shared. However, she could never really “prove it” to have any repercussions because it was all verbal comments with no paper trail to be found.

One day, she had enough

hanged white printing paper
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She decided to play a little prank as revenge. She went over to Debbie and said that the boss was busy but wanted her to deliver a note to Debbie. She handed over the paper.

What was on the paper? Easy

Apple MacBook beside computer mouse on table
Unsplash

The note simply said: “Debbie, you’re fired. Signed, the boss.”

Well, Debbie didn’t take that news too well. The blog post says, “she burst into tears and ran out of the building crying and screaming.”

The author wondered if she took things “too far”

thinking hard gif
Giphy

Feeling a little guilty, she wonders if she handled the situation okay or if it was taking things too far to make Debbie think she got fired. There were mixed reviews on whether or not the author took things too far, though.

One person said yes

The Office Yikes Gif
Giphy


Andrew B(112)429788) said that the author was just as much of a bully as Debbie — however, she made things worse by putting it in writing. They also asked the author how they would feel if Debbie really believed she was fired and decided not to show up to work, etc.

Another disagreed

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Unsplash

Sarah-marie P said that the author didn’t really do anything wrong, she just “lied” to Debbie. “Just because you didn’t have proof of her saying unnecessary remarks about your weight you still could have reported it to your boss,” she wrote.

However, she did add that if Debbie files an unfair dismissal lawsuit, they could be in a lot of trouble.

Do you think she took things too far?

Tags: bullyingOnline CommunitiesPeople & Society

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