Every house has its unique quirks, but most won’t spring their surprises on their owners until they’ve already signed the paperwork and moved in.
For these houses, however, the areas that need improvement should be pretty obvious. In fact, they shouldn’t have happened in the first place. What were the builders thinking?!
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1. Do you think it’s taking safety a bit too far to have a fire hydrant in the driveway?
Sure it’s convenient if your house ever catches fire, but that’s literally the only time it’s convenient.
2. Stairs/balcony not included?
Or “some assembly required,” at least. Either way, pretty sure it’s not up to code — but wouldn’t a small part of you want to put a trampoline just below?
3. Great house if you hate shoveling driveways and parking your car in the garage.
Not such a great house if you hate gardening, I suppose, but you can’t have everything, can you?
4. You want a challenge course for a driveway? This is the house for you.
Unless you’re parking dirtbikes in that garage, you’re not even getting over the curb and around the pole to get onto the chute of the driveway.
5. Not the most subtle facade on the block.
I mean, it’s a nice facade, don’t get me wrong. I’m sure it looks great from the curb. Might need a little work from an angle though.
6. When you can’t decide which street you want your garage to access, I guess you just don’t decide?
And you end up with three doors on your two-car garage, which is…what, a conversation starter?
7. You don’t realize what a big deal symmetry is until you see a house like this.
Then, suddenly, symmetry is a big deal — and you think, wow, I’m so lucky to live in a house that makes sense.
8. Would love to know the decision-making process behind this nightmare.
“Welp, we can’t just cut down the tree, and every house needs a garage, so what the heck, just build it and let the buyer sort it out.”
9. The cabinets in this kitchen defy all logic. Also the countertops and whatever’s going on by the ceiling there. And that’s just the beginning for this house…
Try to uncross your eyes here.
10. Is that bronze covering the rest of the kitchen?
And drapes below the counter? I don’t even know where to look, or what I’m seeing when I settle on something.
11. And scraps of fabric as decor in the dining room? What is even going on here?!
The chairs must be homemade because I can’t imagine a store selling them. And the walls? Pure catastrophe.
12. Hope there isn’t a car in that garage.
And if it is, you’d want the Duke Brothers in it to get the car out — and then you’re never, ever getting it back in.
13. “My town put a new 4-way traffic signal at a 3-way intersection. The fourth light directly faces a house and blasts it with light all day.”
Note the for sale sign on the lawn. That’s a brave realtor!
14. So the path leads up to a blank wall instead of a door, and the balcony above has no support beams holding it up. What could possibly ever go wrong?
15. This house features the ever-popular staircase to nowhere, or possibly the mayor of Munchkinland’s secret entrance to Oz.
More likely, the peaked roof was added on top of an original flat, adobe-style roof.
16. When is a door not just a door? When it’s also a test of your ability to jump and squeeze into a tight space.
Maybe an ideal house for an Olympic gymnast?
17. It’s really only a matter of time until somebody opens the wrong door and finds themselves 10 feet above the driveway.
Maybe they could just grab the staircase from #15?
18. You really have to hope this house wasn’t built someplace that gets particularly icy in the winter, don’t you?
Because when those stairs get slippery, that’s an awful landing at the bottom.
19. Obviously there were some architectural risks taken in this design. Not sure if they paid off.
You have to admit, it might be fun to live in this house — but maybe not to tell anybody you live there.
20. Maybe I put too much weight on traditions and norms, but I feel like something is missing here.
Can’t quite put my finger on what… don’t think they get many salespeople here, though.
21. Best of luck shoveling that in the winter!
You know, unless you want a super dangerous happy fun slide to reverse down into the street, in which case don’t even bother!
22. Is there a new trend for garages that don’t reach the driveway that I don’t know about?
Sure, at least this house has both ample parking and a garage — they just don’t meet up.
23. How to ruin a 150-year-old house with a single addition.
Just goes to show you: sometimes less is more, and more is just ugly. Such a shame — there must have been a better way.
So, would you buy any of these houses? Do you have enough trips to Home Depot in you to fix them up?
Because wow, they need a lot of work.
