Sometimes, people do things with the best intentions , but they don’t always land the way they expect. There are many times when individuals want to help us, do us favors, or even give us gifts—but, we don’t want or need them. Even getting advice from others can mean well, but we didn’t ask, nor want it at all.
Cleaning up the stuff that’s not yours.
idunno324 shared that they cannot stand when people try to tidy up or clean up their things. People always have a specific way they like to have things done, like organizing and cleaning. If they decline, respect it.
Trying to change their mind about big decisions.
athenae99 shared that people are always trying to change her mind about having kids. That is a super personal and important decision that only one person can make on their own. No one should have a say in that.
Commenting on people’s body weight.
“People felt like it was their god-given right to comment about my body. Doesn’t matter where we’re at, if they noticed that I’ve lost weight, you’ll hear it. When I gain weight, you’ll definitely hear about it. Sometimes they mean it as a compliment but it always makes me feel uncomfortable and it’s never welcome,” shared Sure-Initial5224 .
Inviting people to intimate plans.
MaterialConference4 said that they dislike when you are supposed to go see a friend you haven’t seen in a while and they decide to invite someone else to the lunch or plans, saying, “the more the merrier.”
Unsolicited medical advice.
iusedtobefamous1892 said that they hate whenever people try to give them medical advice, or mental health advice, too. Especially when people are not doctors or professionals, they don’t really know the right answers or what advice is medically correct.
Being overly peppy and encouraging.
“I can’t exercise in front of my friends as a fat person. I know they mean well but when they’re overly peppy and encouraging when I’m sweaty and out of breath I just feel stupid. Once we hiked a mountain and I made them go off ahead of me so I wouldn’t snap at them,” shared paranoid-teeth .
Preparing or buying food for someone else.
Ayawa says that even though people are trying to be nice and mean well, not everyone understands what you like/dislike, and some people have dietary restrictions or choices. It makes things awkward if you turn down the food.
Saying, “it’ll all be okay.”
“I absolutely hate when people say it’ll be okay. I find it incredibly dismissive. If I have anxiety or deeply worried about something, telling me it’s going to be okay is just not helpful,” said valerieswrld .
Doing things that someone else is capable of doing.
Rando-Dragon shared that they hate when people do things for you when you can clearly do them yourself like, carrying things or opening jars and cans. Sometimes, we don’t need to be made out to be weak when we’re not.
Stopping on the road.
“As a pedestrian, I hate when people stop and wait for me to cross when there’s no crosswalk. It endangers me because someone might not know why they’re stopped and will go around to pass them, not to mention traffic from the opposite direction may not be clear so they have to wait for that to happen, too,” said Viggos_Broken_Toe .
When people gasp at your age.
Bobcatluv shared she is 40, but she doesn’t look 40. Whenever she says her age to people, everyone gasps and is in shock—they always have to make it a much bigger deal than it needs to be.
Telling people how strong they are.
“Being told how strong or resilient I am in the face of my health issues and the struggle to survive. Sometimes, it feels more like they’re saying, ‘You’re doing so great on your own, so you don’t need any help or support from me! thumbs up .’ Seems other chronically ill people have gotten the same vibe too,” said ayuxx .
Giving dieting tips.
Ok-Experience-8643 shared that when people give unsolicited dieting tips, it can be insulting to people who maybe aren’t trying to diet. Like, telling someone to drink an entire green juice that they may not even want.
Trying to give people a break when they don’t want one.
Fiddleleaffigure confessed that when she had a baby, everyone kept trying to take the baby so she can “have a break” and “go shower” or “go do things,” and she really didn’t need it or want it. After a while, it got annoying.
Not understanding when people explain what is wrong.
“When I express plainly to friends and family that I’m overstimulated and they try to be kind and check up on me. I appreciate the gesture but if the issue is I have too much noise and movement in my environment, adding another human to my immediate space who wants to engage with me is the exact opposite of what I need,” said imfamousoz .
