20 Things Girls Will Def Get

It's all "Baby, listen" and "I love you, I'm sorry" until she starts swinging that thing around like a baseball bat ala Queen Bae/slay/lemonae.

Every girl understands the pain of a botched trip to the salon. What's a girl to do? Schedule your haircuts around hat season and hope you can rock the cute velvet baseball cap look, I guess.

Seriously, since when is this kinda stuff anyone else's business? How about you mind your own and worry about yourself instead of trying to wedge in your opinions about someone else's waistline.

You do your best to tread lightly, tiptoeing across the holes in a feeble attempt to avoid tragedy, but sometimes it's impossible to avoid. We will forever live in fear.

Strategic outfit planning is just part of the agenda. Throw in makeup, hair, nails, and accessories, and you've got yourself a uniform for game time. You just gotta make sure that the rest of your team knows to suit up, too.

If no one is seeing my legs, you better believe that shit is going to be long enough to perm. It takes a long time to shave, it grows back itchy, and razors are expensive. You know what? After making this list, I might just say screw it this summer. Leg hair, don't care.

I very vividly remember my favorite outfit in the ninth grade. It was an white tank top with the South Park characters on it, grossly oversized khaki cargo pants with a drawstring waist, and several butterfly clips in my pixie cut. This is really unfair.

I've eaten a $3 slice of pizza that I dropped in the grass, you better believe I'd crawl through broken glass for $40 eyelashes.

My ripped jeans are cuffed at the ankles and my calves are lookin' smooth AF, but don't be fooled...a mere two inches out of eyesight, I'm rockin' the winter leg from number 6.

Note to the editor: I'm sorry you had to read that, please don't judge me. And don't tell anyone else in the office, I'm really hoping this stays under the radar. Be cool.

A bad one, but a look nonetheless. It sucks, hopping out of the shower feeling fresh and clean, only to look in the mirror and lock eyes with the mascara monster, but it's better than the alternative, which is not taking a shower. Please continue to shower.

It feels like your sunglasses grew six extra arms and morphed into some weird accessory octopus, and all the tentacles are wrapped around pieces of your hair with their suction cups affixed to your forehead. They're hard to untangle, is what I'm trying to say.

Getting them both done at the same time means that you're easily adding an extra hour or two to your beauty routine. This photo speaks volumes.

You know why? Because I want you to stop taking my damn picture, but I also don't want to look stupid in the pictures you DO take, so I panic and start...doing things. We'll call it posing, but honestly, it's just torture until you stop taking my photo.

One time, I drew wings so big they wrapped around my ears, and on that same day, I won the lottery. Then I went to pick up my $5 billion lottery winnings, and the man behind the counter told me that my wings inspired him to pursue his life's passion. That man? Albert Einstein.

That applies to love, friendship, and boobs. Unless you got those fancy high-end celebrity boobs that are indistinguishable from real ones, but seriously, who can afford that? Except me, of course. I recently won $5 billion in the lottery.

...and that's the way your head feels after having a tight ponytail in for an entire day. Ow.

It's time to start your own reality show so that no one ever has to see you off-camera. Force others to view you through a lens. Bonus points if it's sepia-toned.

There's lots of stuff you have to consider, like angles and lighting. Want proof? Look at pretty much any dude's selfie — or better yet, the ones your parents take.

This poor girl must have been interrupted while she was getting ready, because there's no way that this hairstyle was intentional. Right guys? I'm not gonna have to do this to stay cool, am I? :(

You sleep there, what gives? Are you really cool with rolling around in whatever you walked through the day? I hope you're not sharing that bed with anyone, because if it were me, I'd be pretty choked.