When it comes to planning your dream wedding, there are only two people who should be 100% satisfied with the outcome, and those are the two who will be saying “I do”.
For everyone else in attendance, you simply cannot expect to be happy about every single aspect of the event because it simply wasn’t designed to suit your needs and interests.
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After all, you’re just a guest.
It may not be what you want to hear, especially if you’re the kind of person who thinks the world revolves around you, but that day is not for you.
You’re supposed to just show up, toast to the happy couple, eat some food, and hopefully dance, if the DJ happens to be particularly good at their job.
But of course, some people simply aren’t content to just sit back and enjoy a wedding — they have to make waves.
As one poor bride-to-be quickly learned, those waves can be made over just about anything and everything that has to do with the big day , including the menu.
No, seriously. Of all things to possibly get upset about, some people choose the food they’ll be dining on the night of.
Look, if you go to a restaurant and your meal is not to your satisfaction, I can understand feeling a little peeved.
But at a wedding ? Come on. That plate in front of you is free, courtesy of the individuals getting married. I don’t care if you’re not “particularly fond of spinach” — you didn’t have to pay for the meal, so kindly put a sock in it.
The bride in question shared her grievances online in the hopes of determining whether she’s the asshole in this crazy situation.
In a post submitted to the subreddit r/AmITheAsshole, the unnamed bride begins by explaining she and her fiancé are tying the knot next June, and both happen to be strict vegans.
“Although we don’t judge those who are not vegan, we wanted to serve vegan food at our wedding,” she wrote. “We found a vegan caterer.”
Along with the wedding invitations, guests received a note that informed them all food being served at the reception will be vegan.
Additionally, the couple encouraged anyone with specific dietary restrictions to reach out so special arrangements could be made for them.
Of course, they meant people who may have a serious food allergy or food requirement. Not someone who simply doesn’t feel like forgoing meat with their meal for one evening.
However, when some family members got their invite, that was exactly what they reached out to complain about.
The bride’s aunt ended up phoning her “in a huff” to let her know that her uncle can’t eat vegan food and “needs to eat meat.”
Trying to keep the peace and accommodate people, like she said they would, the bride asked her aunt what medical condition her husband has that requires him to eat meat instead of one vegan meal.
The aunt’s response? Apparently the uncle’s reasons are “cultural”, which means he absolutely must eat meat.
To that, the bride replied, “That’s not really a good enough reason, we all come from the same culture and it’s not like it’s a sin to not eat meat with every single meal.”
She also told her aunt that she wouldn’t mind her uncle eating meat at the wedding, except that would mean bringing in a new caterer for just one meal , and also having to pay for a meat-based meal, something she, as a passionate vegan, just isn’t interested in doing.
The conversation ended there, presumably because the aunt understood that it’s the bride’s day, after all, and one vegan meal won’t kill her picky husband.
But then three cousins reached out to the bride to say they eat low-carb diets, so she made sure the caterer knew this ahead of time and was able to come up with a totally vegan, totally low-carb option for those relatives.
Problem solved, right? Well, almost.
The aunt we heard about earlier got wind of these arrangements and immediately phoned up the bride again.
This time she demanded to know why the cousins’ meal requests were catered to but not her own husband’s, prompting her niece to recite every single food that will be served at the wedding that she is certain her picky uncle will eat, including coconut, vegetables, and nuts.
After admitting that no, her husband is not allergic to any of those foods, the aunt continued to demand that changes be made to suit her husband’s need to eat meat.
It’s safe to say this is the point where the bride finally reached her breaking point.
Which I think is understandable, given how unbelievably patient she seems to have been up until this moment. But we all have our limits, and clearly enough was enough now.
As she wrote , “I told her that if he’s so adamant about the meat he can buy himself McDonald’s and eat it at the kiddy table.”
Well, that’s a mic-drop moment if I’ve ever heard one.
After all, if dear old uncle whoever doesn’t feel he can muster through one meal without eating a piece of meat, then perhaps he belongs at the same table as all the other picky eaters in attendance (such as the 6-year-old flower girl and her snot-nosed brother, AKA the ring bearer), so he can eat his 10-piece McNugget meal in peace.
Of course, the bride’s aunt was not happy to hear this, and has since refused to talk to the bride at all.
But she has been talking to other family members to slam the bride and her fiancé for their vegan-only menu, prompting her niece to reach out and tell her and her uncle that “they are welcome to simply not attend the wedding if they’re going to bitch about the food.”
With all this drama going on, the bride is worried she’s coming off as a “pushy vegan”, but also reasoned that’s it’s just “one meal that is FREE.” So with all this in mind, she wants the people of Reddit to tell her if she’s the asshole in this situation.
Not so surprisingly, Reddit responded that in no way is the bride the asshole here.
“Like you said, it is one meal and it’s FREE,” this user reasoned. “And most importantly, it is YOUR wedding.”
Another added, “Exactly. Would it make sense to go to an Indian wedding and fuss that you’re not served tamales or cheeseburgers? “
Many others pointed out that vegan meals can actually be quite delicious, even to omnivores.
“I went to my Godson’s wedding last year and it turns out his wife is vegan, so it was a vegan meal.,” this user shared. “The food was stunning and I only noticed it was vegan when people on my table started grumbling about it halfway through.”
Indeed, I can share that I’ve been to a strictly vegan wedding reception and actually had one of the best meals I’ve ever had there. Just because it’s missing ingredients you might expect to be included doesn’t mean the dish won’t still blow your damn mind.
Ultimately, the consensus was clear: the bride’s uncle needs to grow up and eat the meal, bring his own meat-based dish, or simply not attend because he’s too picky.
This user perhaps said it best when they wrote,
While it’s unclear whether the bride’s uncle and aunt will show up on the actual day or not, we’ve definitely heard a few stories of guests being outright *banned* from the day entirely.
In this tale of pre-wedding drama, the groom took to r/AmITheAsshole to reveal he’s threatened to ban his own brother from attending his wedding, all in an effort to avoid what he feels is sure to be a disastrous display.
As it turns out, that brother revealed that he actually plans on popping the question to his girlfriend at the wedding reception!
At first, the groom thought his brother was surely joking. But after his own bride was told about the plans, he sought out his brother to find out once and for all if this was actually going to happen.
The answer was a very serious “yes”, and the explanation proved these plans were way more nefarious than they initially seemed.
The reason the brother wanted to propose at the wedding was not for love, but for *revenge*.
“He claims it’s ‘getting even’ for when I announced our engagement at the same family dinner he brought his girlfriend to meet the family,” the groom wrote , adding that when he made that announcement, he wasn’t even aware his brother and new girlfriend had even arrived.
The groom took his brother aside and took him that if he still wants to propose at his wedding, then he and his girlfriend (soon to be *fiancée*) are no longer invited.
In fact, if he shows up at the wedding and tries to drop down to one knee, the groom said he will immediately be kicked out.
Naturally, an argument ensued and the brother has since told the whole family that he’s essentially been banned from the day. Now the groom has to deal with phone calls from furious relatives who want to know how he could possibly ban his own brother from his wedding.
So he asked Reddit one question: is he the asshole here?
The answer was a very firm, “no way.”
“It’s your wedding,” one person reasoned . “Besides, proposing at a wedding is super awkward. The wedding is about the couple, not someone who’s going to be getting married in the future.”
Someone else added, “”A marriage that starts with a revenge proposal probably isn’t going to last. If he feels like he needs to one-up his brother, he can’t be that secure or happy in his own relationship.”
Telling your aunt and uncle, or even your own brother, not to attend your wedding is bad. But what about your own *parents*?
One woman took to the r/AmITheAsshole subreddit to find out if she’s truly an asshole for uninviting her mom and dad from her wedding because they tried to make an incredibly huge decision for her.
What decision was that? Well, I’m glad you asked. The bride’s parents actually want her to share her wedding day with her sister, who happens to be engaged to someone the bride positively hates.
Yeah, this one’s definitely filled with drama so I suggest you go refill your popcorn.
As the woman wrote , a few weeks after she got engaged, her younger sister (code named Rosie) got engaged to her terrible boyfriend, code named Mick. What makes him so terrible? Apparently he’s hit on the bride in the past, “slut-shamed” her, and made fun of her children.
So yeah, he’s pretty terrible.
The bride and her groom-to-be were able to secure a venue, but Mick and Rosie haven’t had the same luck, and the earliest they can get married will be 2022.
Apparently, that just doesn’t work for this couple who would rather see their big day fast-tracked . So that’s when the girls’ parents got involved, and pulled t he older sister aside to implore that she and her fiancé have a double ceremony with Mick and Rosie.
The woman quite understandably has refused, but has since been branded “immature” by her parents who say she needs to “share the spotlight.” So she told good old mom and dad that if they really feel this way, then they can consider themselves uninvited from her wedding.
In the aftermath of this blow up, the woman wants to know if she was being an asshole when she banned her parents, but Reddit decided the answer was, “no frickin’ way.”
“What the hell are the parents smoking?” one user implored. “Demanding that you share a wedding is beyond outrageous. Maybe, just MAYYYYBE, I can understand sharing a reception (I mean I still don’t…), but a wedding?”
Another agreed and wrote, “If OP hadn’t put her foot down now chances are that every little detail would have been nitpicked over because Rosie and Mick wanted different colors and decorations and menu modifications and on and on.”
What do you think of all these stories? When is it reasonable to tell a family member not to attend your wedding, and when is it just plain ridiculous? Let us know!
