I think I should start by being fair and admitting that the lead-up to a birth can be a stressful affair for everyone involved.
I've supported someone through a pregnancy that seemed like it was going to be tragic and we all shared in the relief when that turned out not to be the case. And I wasn't even in the delivery room where exhaustion, sympathy pains, and other concerns can be tougher on a supportive partner than many people tend to realize.
But at the same time, when we don't have a frame of reference for how pregnancy, labor, and the act of giving birth feels, it can be surprisingly easy to inflate our own experiences and forget that it's hardest for the one actually going through it.
And since that person has a better idea of what they need than we do, they should be the ones who call the shots for how this will all proceed.