In need of a good laugh? You've come to the right place!
From hitting on their doctors to speaking in a foreign accent to making shocking confessions, people truly say the wildest things when they're out of it. One person even thought they were a ghost!
So come laugh at these anesthesia stories that will have you absolutely cackling!
This Redditor broke the tension in the room with his divorced parents in the most hilarious way.
After his sister pointed out that his junk was hanging out of his hospital gown, he said, "if my balls are hanging out. That makes this a ball gown.’"
"Had a patient come into recovery after surgery. She farted so long and loud the entire 20 bed unit heard her. Then she said 'I was trying to clear my throat, excuse me. And I want a vanilla latte, I got a headache.' As medical professionals, we had to hold in the laughter but that didn't stop patients from turning into hyenas." -u/deleted
"Patient came into the ED as a trauma, got ketamine sedation for an emergency procedure: 'I’m deaaaaaaaad' 'No, you’re ok, we’re taking care of you' 'I’m a ghoooooost. Whooooooo!” wavy arm motions. Ok." -u/talashrrg
This Redditor experienced a patient who announced to the room, “I’m preparing to salsa dance." LOL. They must have been moving and shaking it like they were a professional dancer in their dreams.
"As I am getting her ice chips she starts to go “I hate to see you leave but I love to see you go”. As I disappear to get her some ice chips she starts crying real tears that she scared me off and how sorry she was." - u/darksidemojo
"Eighteen-year-old girl 'recognized' the (male) anesthesiologist from tinder last week and accused him multiple times of not showing up to their agreed date - while randomly falling half-asleep in between." - u/SpectacularSociety
In the middle of wrist surgery, a 65-year-old woman developed a thick Northern Irish accent.
She said, "Did you just fill me up to me head with vodka? gimme a wee bit more boy, I'm loving this [expletive]."
"Anesthesiologist here. During recovery from general anesthesia, I called one of my patients by his full name in a loud voice. He opened his eyes suddenly jumped upright and sit on the bed and he said something : Sir, yes sir! He was under military service at that time." -u/kabourayan
"When I was a toddler, my mom fell off our roof and broke her back. Apparently she was terrified she was going to become a vegetable, because after her back surgery she asked the nurse, 'Am I a broccoli, or a cauliflower?'" - u/tananda7
When this Redditor was getting his wisdom teeth done, he asked his dentist why he chose that profession.
After the dentist told him a great story, he looked this man in the eyes and said, "Well that's a stupid [expletive[ reason to become a dentist."
"A woman was absolutely distraught that she was going to be made to eat asparagus and was repeatedly telling us that she did not like asparagus, especially with eggs, and was politely rejecting the asparagus she thought we were constantly offering her." - u/affogatohoe
Some family tea got DROPPED when this woman undergoing C-section under spinal anaesthesia + ketamine said, "Show my baby first to my brother-in-law, he deserves to see her first." Someone needs to get Maury in here.
"The most memorable funny one was a guy who sat bolt upright, mime rolling a cigarette and tuck it behind his ear 'saving it for ‘ron' when I asked what he was doing. Anesthesia can be a wild trip." - u/neeeeerrrrrddddd
"Oh god I woke up sobbing. I was convinced that I was married to Cedric Diggory and he had just been killed by Voldemort. I’m cringing so hard just thinking about it. I was inconsolable." - u/JamesLilian
This quote comes from a dog! Yes, really. One vet tech said that when a husky came out from anesthesia, it lifted his head and said, “thank you."
"The other tech and I just looked at each other and said, “holy [expletive], did he literally just say that?!?!
"When my brother was waking up after a surgery, my mother was there taking care of him but he couldn't stop laughing. When he was finally able to squeeze out a few words he said: "mom, hahaha, mom your so ugly!" - u/Feisty_Monkey
"When I woke up, the nurse was going through the routine to make sure I was not brain dead. She asks me my name by saying 'who are you?' I respond with, 'I’m a lesbian.' My parents were in the room. They didn’t know at the time. That was how I came out." -u/PLANETshaker22
"Yelling for his brother then whispering loudly to him 'Check to see if I still have my dick... I think they took my dick' then proceeded to flash the whole room." -u/Krinder
