Unsplash | Ben White

Woman Seeks Advice After Admitting She's Having Cold Feet Over Fiancé's Parents

The story of one woman struggling to come to terms with her fiancé's parents meddling in her life gained prolific attention over the last week, as people across the internet, in turn, shared their own stories of in-laws who led to the end of a marriage.

The story came to light after the woman posted on Reddit seeking advice, explaining that "I'm getting married in 3 months but I'm considering calling off the wedding because of his parents."

A lot of people can turn to unusual places for relationship advice in times of crisis.

Unsplash | Kelly Sikkema

There is a lot to be said for seeking the counsel of strangers when it comes to facing a difficult scenario, and so Redditor u/Open-Dimension8766 took to the subreddit "Relationship Advice" for just such assistance.

She started by explaining that she is a 22-year-old woman currently engaged to her 21-year-old fiancé, with just three months to the wedding.

However, she has struggled to ever get on good terms with his parents.

Unsplash | Mike Scheid

"All throughout our relationship, I've always struggled to get on with his parents and the more people I meet who know them, I realise it isn't just me who can't stand them," she started by writing, also going on to say that she normally gets on well with people's parents.

"They are extremely religious (which I have nothing against) but it interferes tremendously with our relationship. We're never allowed to hang out just by ourselves as that means we may have sex before marriage. So everytime we want to go uptown or anywhere, someone has to come with us (which usually ends up being one of the parents," she continued.

Even though they've now bought a house together, they're not allowed to be alone together for even a single moment.

Unsplash | Tierra Mallorca

The woman said that even though she has moved into the house, he must be accompanied on any visits to the house — therefore, she spends a lot of time alone as her husband rigorously respects his parents wishes. She then continued:

"His parents are probably the worst, most childish people I have ever met. I had never met a 58 year old woman who sulks, throws tantrums and has the emotions of a 5 year old until I met his mother. Throw in the father (59) who stirs and causes trouble to get reactions out of his wife and encourages her behavior. He tries to get a rise out of me too all the time."

Ultimately, she wrote that she has had enough. Though she doesn't like coming between him and his parents, she cannot get past her and his parent's differences. And so, as a final question, she asked the internet, "Should I really call off my marriage because I can't stand his parents?"

The majority of the people responding were less than positive about the prospect of the marriage being a success.

Unsplash | Samantha Gades

Many individuals warned that this behvaior is unlikely to alter after marriage. The top comments came in the forms of:

"Meddling, abusive in-law parents compromised my marriage. The ex finished it off by refusing to stand up to them. I walked. Things don't look good."

And, "Majority of the time, this doesn't change after marriage. If he cannot stand up for his future wife and understand your feelings, he will likely not stand up for his wife. I see way [too] many marriages start and end like this. You are about to be his family, family that should come first after only himself, and definitely before parents. If he can't instill boundaries now there's a very tiny slim chance he will be able to do that after marriage. A piece of paper won't make a difference."

There were some people, however, who did think that things might improve post-marriage.

Unsplash | Sandy Millar

One of the few people to think that all is not lost posited, "If his parents behave in this way because of their religious beliefs, would you and your partner getting married not remove the current issues your facing?"

However, with the overwhelming consensus being resoundingly pessimistic based upon the facts that she had provided, the person behind the story suggested that a serious discussion with her fiancé was needed. Hopefully, they will be able to find a way to work through this issue.

What do you think of the situation? Let us know in the comments!

h/t: Reddit

Filed Under: