Sometimes, there are little things wrong with the world. Like how my landlady keeps moving the front steps of my building, which is the only explanation for how many times I've tripped on them in the last month.
Maybe...I don't have a good handle on this concept.
But there's wrong and then there's wrong. And even I know what's going on in this list.
Frankly, sir, you were entrusted with a great responsibility here, and you've shirked it. I have no sympathy for you.
Even being honest wouldn't help, because "I like the feeling of denim under my feet when I go upstairs" just raises more questions. Questions I don't want the answer to.
The Home Improvement theme is all messed up, Jill's spaghetti, more power... It's just a lot to process.
To be fair, there's a lot of stuff that falls in that category for me.
If I could be trusted to make a salad, I wouldn't order out for every meal.
Not in every area of my life. Just kitchens, and apparently the front steps of my building.
Because by the looks of this monster, within five years, tomatoes will be eating us.
As long as the denim stairs person also disagrees that bread stairs should not be a thing.
I mean, I love Sriracha, but if you've got the ability to spray it as a mist, that's dangerous.
Wait, what?
Costumes?
Oh, OK. That's not as cool. Yeah, go ahead and look into that.
While you're there, say "Triceracop" three times and he'll appear.
I need a giant butler and a stroller.
If you count "terrified of falling into the abyss" as a good reason.
Unless it's right at the tip of a U-turn, I don't know how people come close to this thing. I'd have it in my rear-view ASAP.
This is when Carol from HR starts hunting down who's responsible, Liam Neeson-style.
Whether you're facing subway trouble or stuck working with the Joker, it's just never a bad idea.
