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    Dad carrying child on his shoulders (Unsplash | Kelly Sikkema)

    Simple Cardboard Vase Activity Encourages Kids To Explore The Great Outdoors

    Grandma crocheting

    Forget Flowers And Gift The DIYer In Your Life A Yarn Bouquet Instead

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    Home Depot | www.homedepot.com

    People Are Writing Hilarious Reviews For Home Depot’s $1500 Crab Sculpture

    Unsplash | Robin Wersich

    Woman Shares Hack To Help Keep Our Gardens Green All Summer

    Unsplash | Sandie Clarke

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    Gardener’s Genius Hack: Using A Kiddie Pool As A Flower Bed

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    Unsplash | Aubrey Odom-Mabey

    Woman Sets Out To Try All The Recipes Left On Grave Markers

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    Unsplash | Towfiqu barbhuiya

    Here Is The Perfect Peanut Butter And Pickle Sandwich Recipe

    Unsplash | Quin Engle

    A Man’s ‘Demonic’ Way To Cut Pizza Has Divided The Internet

    TikTok | @thewirelady

    Here’s The Perfect Hack For You To Make Chocolate Croissants With An Air Fryer

    Unsplash | Katie Smith

    People Are Dishing Out Their Favorite Lazy Cooking Cheats, So We’re Taking Notes

    Canva

    Disney’s Olaf Hot Chocolate Bombs Are Like A Warm Hug In Every Mug

    Instagram | @lacroixwater

    LaCroix Is Launching A Limoncello Flavor, And It’s The Perfect Mix For Cocktails

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    Unsplash | Aubrey Odom-Mabey

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    Reader's Digest | Paramount

    Cooking Mistakes We’re Probably All Making

    Unsplash | Towfiqu barbhuiya

    Here Is The Perfect Peanut Butter And Pickle Sandwich Recipe

    TikTok | @thewirelady

    Here’s The Perfect Hack For You To Make Chocolate Croissants With An Air Fryer

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    People Are Sharing The Worst Homemade Meals They’ve Ever Had

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40 People Dodging Bullets Just Like Neo

by Diply
8 years ago
in Humor
Reading Time: 8 mins read
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Most people believe that the Matrix movies are fictional, but that’s not entirely true. Some people are born with the same ability as Neo to slow down time and dodge bullets. No matter what situation they find themselves in, they seem to always find a way to come out on top.

Don’t believe me? These pictures are the proof!

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‘I Didn’t Do Anything Wrong’ Says Woman Who Jumped Into Monkey Enclosure

1. Their parents must be elated. This is definitely a major milestone to celebrate!

Image credit: Reddit | Reddit
Reddit | Reddit

“Please let the cooties stage last forever.” You better hope they think Justin Bieber is a “dorkhead” forever.

2. What are the chances? Whoever was in that thing when it went down should buy a lottery ticket!

Image credit: Reddit | felix33
Reddit | felix33

Like, immediately. Go. Maybe we can both go halfsies on a ticket, though. I need some of that luck to rub off on me.

3. HAHA! I tricked the cookie system!

Image credit: Reddit | blakblob
Reddit | blakblob

These fortune cookies sound like my sisters giving me advice. Honestly, though, what kind of dark fortune cookies actually tell you that, for all of eternity, nothing good will happen in your life? Not cool, man, not cool at all.

4. Couldn’t have been more perfect.

Image credit: Imgur | ThatPickleOverThere
Imgur | ThatPickleOverThere

This could have been tree-cherous. Mother Nature is like, “I’ll just leaf this right here.” What’s freaking me out more than this incredible luck are the three nearly identical cars on this street.

5. That could’ve been a train wreck.

Image credit: Reddit | fanofstuff66
Reddit | fanofstuff66

I’ve watched this over and over and my body still tenses every time I see that incoming train. It’s given me a freight !

6. Nice save.

Image credit: Imgur | iamdavidrigby
Imgur | iamdavidrigby

But your mom knows you better than that! She knows full well that your favorite thing to have in your mouth is her homemade lasagna.

7. Great way to the test the waters.

Image credit: Imgur | jefjac2003
Imgur | jefjac2003

Smoooooth. if only all my cringeworthy texts could be blamed on grammar.

8. That could’ve gone downhill quickly.

Image credit: Reddit | zeb1
Reddit | zeb1

And by downhill, I mean into an angry, raging river. Close call!

9. 8/10 on the landing.

Image credit: Imgur | Tsmith95
Imgur | Tsmith95

If I had 1/1000th of the grace this boy has, I would have a full-ride scholarship to Julliard for ballet.

10. Bless up.

Image credit: Imgur | reaaaally
Imgur | reaaaally

Although this could work out well for her in the end, too. When they break up, she won’t even need to crop him out of the pic.

11. Checkmate.

Image credit: Reddit | Scott_Bash
Reddit | Scott_Bash

I can’t stop watching this. I swear, it gets better each time.

12. Good try…but I bet he didn’t buy it for a second.

Image credit: Imgur | DarkSyed
Imgur | DarkSyed

But guess what, dude? Sara’s dad LOVES karaoke. How are you gonna dodge that ?

13. Nailed it.

Image credit: Reddit | tinybell
Reddit | tinybell

People ask me why I wear iron boots in the dead of summer. I show them this picture.

14. I think this dude might actually be Neo.

Image credit: Imgur | ThatOneMusicGuy
Imgur | ThatOneMusicGuy

If you break down this gif and study it frame by frame, you can see the plug in the back of his neck where the Kung Fu was downloaded.

15. Dad’s the Gatorade dealer.

Image credit: Twitter | @housel_emma
Twitter | @housel_emma

Shoulda asked for 3 gs. One for you, one for Dad, and one for the sister who told the entire internet what’s up.

16. It would have been an honest mistake…

Image credit: Reddit | MLBM100
Reddit | MLBM100

If your pancakes taste a bit lemony, don’t look at me. I’ll be sitting on my butter-flavored chair over here.

17. It’s a good thing he forgot to take those pills!

Image credit: Reddit | daemoncel
Reddit | daemoncel

Go home, bed. You’re drunk.

18. These are not interchangeable in the least.

Image credit: Reddit | ccraddock
Reddit | ccraddock

I can tell you that I’m definitely not sleeping through this. Or worse, you’ll find me asleep on the toilet.

19. That would not have been pleasant.

Image credit: Reddit | Timeoffguy
Reddit | Timeoffguy

I recall pulling something like this on my dad as a kid. He still hasn’t forgiven me.

20. You’ve got to be quick on the draw, lest our parents have time to check Urban Dictionary.

Image credit: Instagram | @nikkeilaa
Instagram | @nikkeilaa

This recovery is as quick as they come! Always double-check who you’re texting!

21. Probably dropped from two feet.

Image credit: Imgur | nae6
Imgur | nae6

Would hate to ruin that pedicure. If she hadn’t been able to save her toes, she’d at least be able to save some nail polish later on.

22. This could’ve been souper annoying.

Image credit: Imgur | danceswithsarcasm
Imgur | danceswithsarcasm

Nothing like seasoning your meal with whatever bacteria happens to be lurking on your fingers as you fish your spoon from the bottom of your bowl.

23. Now that’s quick thinking!

Image credit: Reddit | Art_Van_Delay
Reddit | Art_Van_Delay

24. Here’s a situation that’s best caught earlier than later!

Image credit: Instagram | @douch.e
Instagram | @douch.e

That could have been a terrible third date conversation. Luckily, they found out just how much they had in common within the first few texts.

25. Then there’s this clever guy who just wants to make a friend

Image credit: Instagram | @nochill
Instagram | @nochill

There are very few friendlier people you’ll meet than, well, someone who just wants to reach out and make sure you’re okay.

26. Hate to see a dinner go to waste. Time to come up with a new creation!

Image credit: Twitter | @WORLDSTAR
Twitter | @WORLDSTAR

This was basically a minor mistake, but it led to perhaps a very important invention! The hamdog… smh.

27. Got out of there just in time

Image credit: Reddit | alexdagreat15
Reddit | alexdagreat15

28. Phew! That was a close one.

Image credit: Imgur | usernamenotrelevant
Imgur | usernamenotrelevant

Nothing can ruin a day like a yellow Starburst. If you say your fav is yellow, I’ll fight you.

29. They never saw it coming…

Image credit: NY Daily News | NY Daily News
NY Daily News | NY Daily News

Seriously though, they’re lucky it missed the windshield!

30. Sometimes, you’ve got to rely on the kindness of strangers.

Image credit: Twitter | @Ainahss
Twitter | @Ainahss

The catfishing game just ain’t as easy as it used to be. Luckily for her, ladies got each other’s backs!

31. Nice save! I guess this Christmas has a Jurassic Park theme

Image credit: Imgur | damsell
Imgur | damsell

32. Another great example of wall art that saved the day…or at least saved a dry-wall job.

Image credit: Reddit | Rwolinski
Reddit | Rwolinski

33. Can I axe you about your window?

Image credit: Imgur | Bigfloppy
Imgur | Bigfloppy

Quite the axe-cident, amirite?

34. Welp. That was a close one

Image credit: Reddit | dizzle93
Reddit | dizzle93

35. Good thing you turned the bathroom light on before wiping…

Image credit: Imgur | MadMexican
Imgur | MadMexican

Similarly, this is why I don’t wipe my butt when I’m drunk

36. Hopefully the landlord appreciates it just as much as I do

Image credit: Reddit | [deleted]
Reddit | [deleted]

37. He’s dodging greasy bullets with this one

Image credit: Reddit | hades0401
Reddit | hades0401

38. Good thing you read the labels before making cereal this morning

Image credit: Reddit | DorkasaurusRex
Reddit | DorkasaurusRex

Ever want to know what it would be like to eat cereal drenched in snot? This experience would comparable

39. This is why you double-check your alarms before bed!

Image credit: Reddit | Divamergency
Reddit | Divamergency

Thankfully my phone defaults to AM for alarms, which is particularly charming when I try to set a 4 PM reminder to start dinner…

40. Tattoo removal can be tough, but if you can figure out away around it, you win!

Image credit: Reddit | MustardTiger99
Reddit | MustardTiger99

Like this guy who, after his breakup with Lauren, decided to class the tat up a bit!

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