Have you done the "Florida man" challenge?
Just plug your birthday along with "Florida man" into Google and see what you come up with. It's basically a surreal mad libs of felonious human behavior. Anywhere else, it seems impossible. But Florida isn't anywhere else.
Sometimes enough is enough. Sometimes bodily functions need to happen. I don't think anyone needed to pull a knife, but no one needed to complain, either. Mistakes were made on both sides.
Many of us have reasoned along similar lines: if you've just done something, what are the odds you'll get caught again? Well, in this guy's case, it turns out the odds were high.
You know, I don't think a hundred thousand words could convey whatever happened here. It just seems like something you had to see to truly believe.
This guy thought he had the perfect plan. Imagine his face when the cops, undeterred and unbamboozled, simply searched his car and arrested him for carrying all of the drugs.
Neighborly disputes are nothing new, but you can always count on the good people of Florida to add something new to the mix by using hedge tools in innovative new ways.
Everyone's had a difference of opinion with a fast food employee at some point. Usually things are resolved when a manager steps in and hands out coupons. The tactic shown above is never recommended.
It's a drastic move, but think of the gains! They'll have endless things of value, like, uh, brightly colored, oversized novelty teddy bears! It's definitely worth the hassle.
A threatening man with a penchant for dad rock who can only be soothed by the promise of delicious pizza? The story described by that headline is an absolute emotional rollercoaster.
It's easy to look at this and judge the guy, but just think about the fact that Van Gogh did basically the same thing with his ear and now he's legendary.
I would imagine that developing ways to scare off the random nude interlopers in your backyard is a rite of passage for any Floridian. This grandma is doing what she was born to do.
You know, those Big Mouth Billy Bass things were always a source of joy to me. It's sad to see that a fun novelty item has been an unwitting tool of violence.
When the munchies hit, sometimes they hit hard. And nothing quite satisfies like a delicious bowl of starchy ramen. The nudity, though, I can't really explain that part away.
A ride is a ride is a ride, and maybe they figured they were exploiting some legal loophole. But still, those things go, like, one mile an hour. Just walk, man.
I'd like to know the confluence of reasoning that went on in her head to lead her to shave her legs in the cold, cold water of a public pool.
When you see that stories like this, where a man joyously runs into a store carrying a live alligator while it's streamed on Facebook, it's easy to think that social media is a mistake.
In a sense, starting your own counterfeiting is an industrious (though almost adorably naive) thing to try. This guy did his best, but apparently the templates he Googled didn't pass muster.
Whether the drive-thru was a Taco Bell, a bank or, inevitably, the police station, one thing was for certain: this guy wanted tacos, and he wasn't picky about where he went looking for them.
To conclude this list, we'd like to feature this story. Florida, you eccentricities entertain us but at the end of the day, you're awesome. Please be kind to us, bionic Florida man.
