“My dog ate my homework” is a classic excuse, but what do you do when the dog actually eats your homework? In the days before camera phones, it was pretty hard to prove why you were tardy in getting something done.
It turns out that some of the best excuses aren’t made up at all, and yet they are so crazy that you just have to say, “Pics or it didn’t happen.”
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Nagol93’s boss should have believed them, but timing was everything.
” Me: ‘Boss, I’m going to be late. There’s like 3 cars on fire on the highway.’
Boss: ‘Dude, I was just on the highway 15min ago. There’s no burning cars.’
Me: (sends him a pic of the burning cars and paramedics.)
Boss: ‘When did that happen?!?!?!?’
Me: ‘I guess less then 15min ago.'”
Geese are evil. Period.
“There was several geese around my motorbike and refusing to let me on it. I ring my boss and they didn’t believe it until I came in with photos of hells geese hissing at me because it was their bike now!
I hate geese, they scare me.” — solo1024
Add this to the list of reasons I’d never live in a house boat.
After a storm raised the water level, the gang plank for IxAMxSHAKE’s house boat fell, trapping them aboard.
“My boss thought o was making it up until I showed him the pictures the next day,” they said .
“A house was in my way,” said teke367.
“Was behind a truck moving a “modular home” that had some sort of issue and was stopped. Obviously, if a car breaks down in front of you, you can usually just drive around it, but this took up pretty much the whole road. A cop had to direct traffic around it.”
“My printer caught fire.” —walkingcarpet23
“Final paper due at EXACTLY 11:00am.
I submitted it electronically before the deadline and showed up at 11:15 rather out of breath and was told it was too late. Professor said I’d get a zero.
I showed her the burnt paper, and a picture of my burnt up printer sitting on the sidewalk I took with my phone. Got an exception and was allowed to submit.”
Fire seems to be a common theme.
“I don’t remember if the teacher believed me,” said Screaming_Possum_Ian , “but someone had really stolen my parents’ car, drove it until the fuel tank was empty, and burned it in a field.”
“The bull got out and was hit by a gravel truck.” —Renbelle
“I live in rural suburbs near a major TX city. Think farmland being turned into subdivisions. This bull had a habit of getting out of his part of the field. Probably the most Texan reason to be late ever.”
Zeroone got away with it due to a technicality.
“I got a janitor to let me into the school and then to open the classroom door. I put it on the teacher’s desk. The next day, I told him I delivered it to him just before midnight, which should count as before end of day since he didn’t say “end of school day.” He sighed and told me fine. He didn’t consider it late.”
When in Alaska, moose can be a problem.
“I lived in a duplex but the only way to get to my side was up the only flight of stairs, my portion was above the garages,” explains Scalpoholic .
“Had a moose hanging out at the bottom of the stairs, just sitting there. Had to be late for work cause there was no way I was about to go down there.”
It’s hard to get a parent to believe that the school is on fire.
Bestprocrastinator describes the call like this: “‘Hey dad, I promise I’m not pranking you and that this is actually happening, but my school is on fire, can you come and pick me up?'”
“I was out of pants.”
When EggsOverDoug was a freshman, he went to retrieve his clothing from the dorm dryer only to discover someone had stolen it all. He was stuck with a single pair of shorts.
“It was winter in Wisconsin, and I wasn’t going to risk getting some kind of frostbite to take a test. I email my professor that all my clothes were stolen, and I wouldn’t be able to make it to class.”
“I got distracted watching the University swan eat a duck.” —Quetzel
Frankly, if there is one bird that could give geese a run for their money, it’s swans . They just hid their evil under a pretty face.
What a waste of monkey bread!
“My dad once threw some monkey bread outside,” said SamCarter_SGC , “It was winter. It froze solid over night. I tripped and rolled my ankle on the way out the door because a squirrel or something had picked it up and booby trapped our porch.”
“Was waiting for the bus when someone in a passing car threw an egg at me,” said Finemor.
“Got me straight in the temple. Had to go home and clean up, was an hour late. People at work called me egg head that day..
“Right before I had to leave for work my cat fell in the toilet.”
The mental image I received upon reading this excuse is just incredible. That cat must have been so upset!
User xmasusx “got lost walking to school. Very, very lost.”
Since these were the days before cell phones and Google Maps, xmagusx was forced to find a payphone to call their father.
After an awkward conversation, they figured out that he was several miles off track.
“This was in high school.
This was a route I had walked many, many times previously.
I just started thinking about something or another and started walking on autopilot for evidently quite some time before it dawned on me that I no longer recognized any of my surroundings.”
Animals have no consideration for our schedules.
“Was leaving a hotel to set up for a trade show. Near the entrance to the parking lot there was a pond and small bridge. Also a large sign saying to yield to the ducks/violators will be prosecuted,” said TheSexyMicrowave .
“The ducks did not want to move off the bridge despite me laying on the horn a few times. Had it on film and showed it to the people who were waiting on me and had a good laugh.”
“One time I had to miss a bunch of classes and was late for one because my cat grizzly bear maced me.”
Baby-Got-Books-1989 lived in a rough neighborhood, so her dad gave her mace in case of a break-in.
“Well, one day I left it on the table with no cap and no safety locked. My cat knocked it off. It landed on the trigger and went off on me. It was soooooo painful.”
Yes, you can get sun burned badly enough that you can’t walk.
According to ItsThatAshGuy , “Next day I tell them I still can’t walk and my boss needs a picture as proof. My legs were all scabbed and disgusting. He said to take as much time as I need.”
“I couldn’t find my car keys” seems like a basic excuse, except…
“They were in the ignition of my car. I was prestarting it because it was forty below,” Samalamaable clarified.
“I have never heard my bosses laugh so loud when I was explaining it.”
Aren’t birds the worst?
“My bird ate my homework. Had to redo the assignment because my mother would not let her straight A student show up without the homework completed.” — Macabalony
Be careful when there are politicians on campus.
RamsesThePigeon wanted to see Ralph Nader’s campaign talk, but had to duck out early in order to make it to class.
“I took a side door, which I’d hoped would lead me backstage and to an exit.
Instead, it led me right into the company of two Secret Service agents.”
They didn’t let him go to class until after Nader had left, but they just barely made it to class anyway.
“The professor, seeing that I was out of breath, asked me why I had been ‘almost late.’ I replied by saying that I’d really tried to be there on time, but that the Secret Service had stopped me.
My professor laughed and told me to sit down. Against my better judgment, I replied by insisting that I was telling the truth.
‘I know,’ the man answered. ‘It happened to me once, too.'”
He did not elaborate.”
